Najine was three years old when her mom left their house for several days, as she'd just had her baby and needed to rest for awhile before coming back. That left only Najine herself and her dad back at home, which made the rooms strangely silent, she thought. To be fair, their house was of the naturally calm type, with the main colors pale pink, brown and cream, giving off an aura of peaceful – and occasionally boring – quiet. However, paintings kept the walls from becoming mundane or looking too big, and various trinkets were scattered around the shelves and windowsills, which was something Najine enjoyed staring at, occasionally asking her parents how they got them. All in all, she liked her home, and wasn't used to this new sense of slightly eerie nothingness. She hoped their family would be united again soon, so the loneliness that had appeared in the air would go away, and she could see their new family member again.
It was during one of those silent few days of waiting her dad sat down in front of her at the kitchen table, and asked her something very peculiar.
«What do you think his name should be?»
For some reason, Najine hadn't ever even thought of that. The idea that you could simply choose a name for a baby seemed so impossible, because names were part of a person, and no one could have the power to decide that for you. That would be like deciding someone's gender, or eye color, or who their parents were. It wasn't something you decided, it just was. However, her wonderment wasn't going to prevent her from coming with suggestions, as the possibility that she could be the one to choose a real life baby's name was not something she was going pass up just because it was too amazing. Especially since it was her own little brother they were talking about.
Therefore, Najine threw herself at the question with vigor, suggesting anything and everything that came to mind that didn't sound too bad. However, her dad never really seemed to like her names. After about ten of them, with each and every one getting swiftly rejected, he came with his own suggestion, «Kanè». Kanè. What kind of name was that? Well, she supposed it was a pretty regular one, but Najine wasn't really that fond of it. She quickly tried coming up with something else, but her dad stuck with the name, and as time went by, she realized she was fighting a losing battle. In fact, she thought he might have decided on the name before he even asked for her opinion. And so, after finally giving up on her most favored idea, Sif, after her favorite stuffed animal, she accepted the Kanè would be her brother's name. Grudgingly.
Later, when Najine was exaggeratedly complaining to her mom about dad asking Najine for her opinion when he'd really decided on the name already, and making such a fuss about it that it might as well have been the end of Naboo she was talking about, her mom told her that the reason they chose the name Kanè was because that in her dad's family, it was tradition to alternate between Kanè and her dad's name for the eldest son. Then, that son would give his own son the other name, and so on. This meant that her little brother was actually named after her grandfather! Her mom said. Najine, however, had been caught up with something else from earlier in the explanation.
«Dad has a name?» she asked. Her mom laughed and nodded, telling her that he was called Kephan. Najine pondered this for a moment, before looking back up at her mom and asking whether she had a name, too. She did. Her mom's name was Neka.
Later, Najine thought it over, and concluded that she was a little happy she could choose whichever names she wanted for her kids when she got some, partly because she might not like the ones the tradition would have told her to use, and partly because it would be pretty fantastic to be able to choose a name all by herself. Or rather with only her husband, she supposed, but she wasn't really sure she wanted one of those.
Kanè screamed a lot. He screamed and cried and took up so much attention from their parents, it was a wonder one little baby could manage it. Usually, though, Najine didn't really notice. Whether he was smiling or frowning or laughing or wailing wasn't really important to her, as she couldn't see much of a pattern to it, and therefore supposed it was just a baby thing, like he had to get used to all the different moods so he could use them properly when he grew up or something. So even though she preferred to have him giggling, blue eyes shining as they took in the world surrounding them, she didn't notice much of Kanè's crying as their mom or dad cooed at him and tried to make him happy again. No, she was much too busy staring at him to do that.
The little thing was a miracle. That much Najine knew as she would stare intensely at it, trying to understand. A little baby that had lived in their mom's tummy, and before that not even existing. So how could it be here now? How could it wave it's chubby arms in the air, be dressed in the galaxy's smallest clothing, react to what happened around it, and actually be a real, thinking, living being? It just didn't make sense. No matter how much she thought about it, and no matter which way she looked at it, she couldn't understand. Therefore, she spent hours and days around her little baby brother, watching and thinking, trying to solve this new, impossible puzzle. And though eventually, she accepted that the complex greatness of life would never be something she could truly comprehend, she never really got over her wonder of living things, many times revisiting the corner of her mind reserved for pondering this.
When Kanè first learned how to walk, Najine stuck to him like a shadow. She would sit on the floor and watch his progress as he stumbled around, taking great joy in reaching for the things he'd never been high enough to get a hold of before and laughing like a maniac. She decided he was old enough to know when to use the right emotions now, and loved seeing him smile. Sometimes, she would hold his hand, and together they would slowly walk around the rooms or the different places they visited, with big grasslands being a particular favorite.
When she was watching over something this fragile and valuable, Najine felt important. She hadn't ever been entrusted with anything that even came close to this important before, and when she thought about how her mother used to tell her how she and Kanè were the most important things in her whole world, she didn't think she would ever get the chance again, either. And so she watched over Kanè, prepared to protect him against anything and anyone, even if she didn't really know how she would do that if something actually happened. But she wasn't going to fail here.
As time went by, the two children grew closer. Kanè would come to Najine when he wanted to play, and Najine would come up with something. What they did varied greatly. Sometimes they would run outside, or play hide and seek, or shoot at each other with their hands acting as guns, while other times they would use real things to do something, like puzzling, or drawing together, or even making houses out of blankets. When Kanè was afraid to go to sleep, Najine would check for monsters under his bed, and then tell him of the story she'd created a long time ago about how the three moons of Naboo were actually magical, and their purpose was to protect little children from monsters at night. Every now and then they would have a fight, but neither of them liked it when they had to avoid each other, and as they weren't very good at holding onto their anger either, they always got over it quickly.
One day, their dad had decided to buy them cake, for no specific reason. This wasn't something that happened very often, and to Kanè and Najine, it was a gift from above. The cake turned out to be one of the smaller, flatter types, and so they were given three pieces each. Najine finished first, with Kanè having a whole piece of his own cake left. He noticed her sad staring, and after looking at his last slice with a mournful sort of contemplation for a moment, he turned back to face her, placing the piece on her plate. And he smiled. Partly so she wouldn't be worried about him for taking his cake, but also because he wanted her to be happy, and by giving her his food, he could make her so. Najine handed the cake back to him, making sure that she was smiling too, so he wouldn't insist on her taking it. And if her smile was ever so slightly sad, that wasn't because of the cake. That was because her heart had broken just a little by seeing how easily Kanè would put others before himself, not even giving it a second thought. She didn't really mind not getting the last piece anymore, either.
Najine and Kanè were different. Not just in names and looks, but also in personalities. Najine sometimes had slightly bossy tendencies, spent a lot of time simply thinking things over and marveling at the bigger things, always made sure that everyone felt happy and included, was perceptive and usually saw stories from more than one side, and while she wasn't particularly brave, she was incredibly protective.
Kanè, however, usually took things at face value and was helpful, brave, caring, accepting, eager, actively trying to make others happy, became sad when others were, and while he didn't always think before he did something, and thereby sometimes hurt someone, he always tried to make up for it afterwards. He wasn't too observant, and so often needed help to notice it when someone didn't really appear all that cheerful, but he immediately reached out to them when it was pointed out to him. He was also naïve, believing that as long as he was nice to others, they would be nice to him in return, and as he instinctively believed in people and what they told him, words could easily hurt him. Or, at least, they could have easily hurt him if Najine hadn't been there to protect him from them.
As they grew older, both siblings met more kids around their age, especially when they started school. Najine hadn't realized it before, but she hadn't stopped protecting Kanè since she first began watching his attempts to walk. She still kept close to him, standing a little in front of him when they faced strangers, helping him along when someone asked him a question he had trouble with, and most importantly, made sure he was happy. Because as long as her little brother still had that brilliant little glint in his eye, the world would somehow always find a way to keep spinning.
But then he started school too, and there they went to different classes, and how was she then supposed to be there for him? Kanè was the most optimistic, helpful, smiling person she'd ever met, but as he was all too easily breakable, Najine had been very careful with not letting anyone crush him by telling him terrible stories about people and how the galaxy was a dark place and that his take on life simply wasn't possible. She would make sure that until he could protect himself from potential onslaughts of words, and put up an argument for himself, she would be there to do it for him. But if she wasn't there, how was she going to do that? Naboo was a peaceful planet that valued pacifism and rationalism above all other virtues, but somehow, the attitude of a bully always seemed to peek through here and there, no matter how nice the people.
In the end, she supposed, she'd just have to trust that Kanè was ready to defend himself. And, of course, watch extra closely for signs of a withering spirit. Nothing was going to step on this little sprout and walk away unscathed.
While going through the years of school, Najine became well-liked enough, though she was never especially popular. She was of the sort that no-one really disliked and a few made slightly distant friends with, and so was usually invited into games where many participants were preferable, but there was never any contest about teaming up with. Najine wasn't really sorry about this, however, because for there to be a contest, two people were needed. And while she didn't have two close friends, she did indeed have one.
Mun, was his name. The two of them were quite possibly the closest in the whole class, having hit off immediately on the first day they met. When given something to solve, Mun would dedicate all his concentration to that one thing, usually not even noticing others talking directly to him, which meant that during class, Najine had to make sure he looked up whenever the teacher started talking. This extreme focus was something he seemed to carry with him everywhere as long as he had something to aim it on, and even when holding a conversation, Najine had to take the lead if they were walking to make sure he didn't crash into any trees. This ability of his was so complete, that when they one day had decided to play magical children living in an enchanted forest, and Najine had broken it off by saying that it was getting late and they should probably go back, he had, for a moment, wore a look of such complete confusion that she could have sworn he'd forgotten that he wasn't actually magical at all.
Kanè managed to best Najine in the friend-making area, gaining many distant friend and two closer ones. Najine was pretty sure he'd invited everyone in his class with him home at least once, but the most frequent visitors were Rakita and Mindro. Najine had talked to them both and seen them around the house and at school, and had, in the end, reached the conclusion that Kanè had chosen his friends well. Mindro was a quiet, curious boy with a silent kind of kindness, reaching out to people by simply sitting down beside them and wordlessly offering a shoulder to lean on. Rakita was much louder, openly speaking her opinion about most things and thereby often having to correct herself, but also learning a lot about different points of view. She was also fierce and protective, which was the main reason Najine liked her, as she was confident that Rakita would not let friends be bothered or bullied, instead yelling her throat and the unfortunate foe's ears soar, before marching off with a pair of stunned friends following in her wake.
From the time when they shot at each other with their hands functioning as guns, they still hadn't stopped playing and coming up with new variations of their role-plays. Now, they were usually Jedi attempting to save the planet, or the leaders of a magical people trying to survive the evil powers surrounding them, or running from the corrupt, magic-hating bosses in charge of the galaxy. Sometimes, Mun or Mindro and Rakita would join them, with Mun being the most common participator of the three of them, but usually they played alone.
It was common that they only barely survived, sometimes with the help of a blast of extreme power exploding out of one of them, or maybe even a heroic sacrifice where one of them dies to save the other and the mission, if it hadn't been completed the moment the dramatic act was executed. They would talk in weird accents, make up monsters as they went along, and sometimes randomly find rare artifacts buried in the ground close to where they lived, or given one by a grateful king. Their fighting was always the best of the best, their names well-known throughout the galaxy for their amazing deeds.
Najine had always thought that she wanted to be what she pretended she was during the role-plays. Therefore, it came as a bit of a shock when she realized that her assumption was, in fact, incorrect. Sure, she would have loved to save people and be brave and valiant, but as she lacked the traits needed, the job itself wasn't something she wanted. She didn't yearn for the action or the recognition of being a hero. Instead, she dreamed of a normal life, working in a shop or as a teacher or at a museum, having kids and simply cherishing life. And when she thought about it, it really shouldn't have been that surprising – how many other children didn't she know that wanted the exact same exciting life, and how many heroes were there actually out there compared to the normal people? But Najine was fine with that. And while she continued to enjoy playing heroes, becoming a person that she in all reality wasn't, she really didn't mind that it was all just pretend.
On Najine's sixteenth birthday, Kanè spontaneously decided that he wanted to give her a present. Not having much time, and not being particularly gifted when it came to making things, he looked up the prettiest picture he could find in a nearby magazine, cut it out, and wrote a quick greeting on the backside. Then he handed it over to Najine, who had been sitting right beside him while he was working, and apologized for his poor gift.
What Najine never told Kanè, was how much that picture meant to her. It showed the dark silhouette of two hands holding each other in a firm grip close to the camera, with a beautiful city in the background, its lights shining brightly in the night. On the backside, some sort of recipe was listed, with «Happy birthday, Najine! You're the best big sister in the galaxy!» scrawled over it. What Najine valued so much with that gift, was not only that she knew Kanè meant every word he'd written, but that he'd made it for her. Whenever he had made something before, whether it be a drawing or a piece of bark with a smiley face on it, it had been given to their parents. Never before had he given something like that to her, and while she hadn't minded, hadn't even thought of it before in that moment, she knew that she would keep this picture for a long time.
Najine had a very happy life. She enjoyed Naboo, and planned on staying there rather than moving away. She loved her family, and wanted to live close to home when she moved out. She appreciated life, and intended to spend it with the people she deemed worthy of living it with. She worked in a flower shop not far away from home, and she liked it there. In the end, there was only one thing that was starting to bug her ever so slightly, minor problems aside. If she was going to have kids, she needed a husband. And as she did want to have kids eventually, she would need to find one soon. Of course, she was still only nineteen, but she had to have known the one she married for a while before marriage, to be certain that this was the one, and she wanted kids while still relatively young. Not yet, she knew, but she had always been one to think of the future, and the idea that if she didn't find anyone soon she might very well never have kids in her whole life suddenly didn't sound so far-fetched, even though she knew this was just her imagination making a minor problem seem like a major threat to her plan for life.
And so, when she was complaining to her dad about this new, overarching problem that her mom obviously wasn't taking seriously as she simply said Najine wasn't being realistic and that it would pass, and he immediately informed her that she was going to marry Mun, in a voice suggesting that this was as clear as the sky was blue, he had unknowingly stopped what could have become a full-blown – and completely unnecessary – panic attack. And in the end, he turned out to be right. At twenty-one years old, Najine married Mun.
She should have seen it coming. They had pretended to be superheroes, dreamed of travelling the stars, and discussed what kind of weapons would be coolest to fight with. But when Kanè, at nineteen years old, announced that he was going to follow his dreams, Najine was still shocked.
Her most immediate reaction after that, was wondering why she was so surprised. Kanè could choose whichever career he wanted, so why did she react so strongly to it? Eventually, she came to the conclusion that after realizing that she didn't want to travel from planet to planet after all, she had simply assumed that, with time, Kanè would do the same thing. That he would realize that saving people and taking chances were for brave people. But then, Kanè was brave. She knew that, but the two thoughts just hadn't connected before. And now he was joining the Royal Naboo Security Forces. He said he'd try working there for a while, maybe take some classes in fighting, before he would start travelling to see the different planets out there. The latter part of that statement hurt. Once again, Najine wondered why. She had always wanted Kanè to be happy, and if travelling the stars was what it took for him to be so, shouldn't she be glad for him? What made this time different, so different, in fact, that her reaction was the opposite of what it was supposed to?
In the end, the answer was easy. She just hadn't wanted to admit it to herself, subconsciously keeping herself from reaching the obvious conclusion. The reason was that his happiness, for the first time, ruined her own. Her perfect future included the people she loved, and if Kanè left the planet, how was he supposed to be in it? Sure, he promised that it was only temporary, that he would come back, but Najine had a sneaking suspicion that it might just become the other way around. Mostly travelling, sometimes coming back on a quick visit, and maybe even dying on a dusty planet somewhere where she would never be able find out about it. How could she let him disappear out of her sight like that?
But she knew that this wasn't her choice. And while Najine was certain that she could convince Kanè to stay, as he would cancel his plans the moment she told him how sad she'd be if he left, she wasn't going to destroy his future like that. And they would still keep in contact, so it could have been worse. Knowing Kanè, he would send her transmissions daily telling her all about the amazing things he'd seen and all the fantastic people he'd met, and she would answer that it was great that he'd finally met people as crazy as himself. They would pull it off. But the most important reason she wasn't going to do anything about his impending departure, was that his happiness would always, always come before her own.
Naboo had been starving for a month. The Trade Federation was blocking any access to and from the planet, leaving the streets quiet and with an almost tangible sense of panic hanging over them. Najine was pregnant, worrying herself sick over the baby's future. Would the Trade Federation ever let up their blockade? Was the baby even going to see sunlight before all of Naboo was silenced forever? Was Naboo going to be silenced forever? She wished Kanè had left already. Then he would be safe, away from this creeping feeling of death looming over them, a feeling she'd never believed could quite possibly be associated with Naboo. But things would get better soon, she hoped. They had to.
Things didn't get better. Soon, she was trapped in a slave camp, with steely, cold walls and little to no food. Mun did his best to help her, but nothing he did could diminish her worry, because the baby wasn't going to survive, and Kanè wasn't in the same camp, and he could be dead, and she was supposed to protect him but she wasn't and why was that and nothing was okay and nothing would ever be okay again because she had failed at protecting the little boy that had stumbled around the kitchen floor so long ago and she just wished she was back there again and she had a baby and where was her happy ending now and –
They were saved. Suddenly, the droids just stopped, like a game someone turned off with no warning. Soon, rescue teams arrived, but Najine couldn't calm down. The first thing she did when she got out of the dark hole of a camp and arrived back home was call her brother. And then, after all her worrying and incoherent thinking, she would finally get to hear his voice again, and know he was alright.
Except…
Three months later, she had her baby boy. And she named him Kephan, after her father, because nobody else was going to.