Don't own em but grew to love'em and am grateful I can still enjoy em.

The Honor is Mine

It had been a quiet night at station 51 but the three alarm fire they had responded to just before bed had taken enough out of them that it was still hard to throw their covers off when the wake up tones sounded. Still everyone at the station managed to pull their feet onto the floor, stretch for the ceiling and yaawwnn. Everyone that is except Chet Kelly who lay on top of his blankets with full turn outs on staring at the ceiling as if he were in a trance.

Across the isle the station's two paramedics noticed his lack of movement and John Gage was quick to walk over and was about to slap the bottoms of his boots to rouse him when he noticed the way Chet's arms were guarding his right chest area.

"Chet, Are you all right?" John asked and his partner Roy was quick to try and see what would invite such a response.

"I'm fine," Chet declared unconvincingly as he quickly threw his feet to the side of the bed and sat up still holding his side.

"What d'ya do to your ribs?" Roy asked but he also noticed the moisture around Chet's bloodshot eyes.

"Nothin," Chet snapped, "Absolutely nothing, I'm fine." He got to his feet and headed for the locker room when Captain Stanley who had overheard the conversation stopped him.

"Sure you don't need to be checked out?" He asked. "I seem to remember you going down on your knees during that fire last night. Did you get hurt when no one was watching?"

"No Cap," Chet tried to move his arms away from his side but even that effort seemed stiff and unnatural. "I really need to use the facilities," He tried to push past his crewmates and leader but they were reluctant to move. "You wouldn't want to cause me to have an accident now would you?"

At that John turned and allowed him passage but once he was out of the room the remaining five shift mates shared questioning looks with each other. Their normally joyous, prankster of a shift mate had been extra quiet all shift. Having just returned from vacation he spent most of the shift off on his own anywhere his crew mates weren't and quiet. Everyone had been afraid that he was planning some great joke on all of them and they were all walking on egg shells being extra careful when ever they opened a door or a cupboard the whole shift but now as they thought back on the shift they realized he really hadn't been himself.

Now as they looked at each other they were all in silent agreement of one thing, something was wrong.

The morning coffee was made and everyone was keeping a careful watch for their worrisome shift mate but the next time they saw him was when the Claxton's chimed calling them to an MVA with injuries. That's when he came running from the dorm dressed in his uniform and climbed on the engine.

Johnny kept a watchful eye on his friend as he pulled his equipment from the squad and thought there was something amiss in his movements but the victims were the higher priority and it took everything they had to get the patients to the hospital alive even though one of them didn't make it long after they arrived.

John had deliberately requested Kelly bring the squad in for them in hopes of getting him checked out but he refused and the doctors couldn't force him to accept treatment.

Back at the station the rest of the shift was changing into their street clothes except for Captain Stanley who was standing in the door way to his office waiting for his remaining crew to return.

Roy recognized the hopeful look in the captain's eyes and shook his head negative to the unasked question as he got out of the squad.

"Kelly, how about coming into my office for a moment," Hank asked hoping to get the young man to open up and feeling guilty for not having done so a lot sooner.

"A cap, I a, really need to go," Chet stammered.

"Chet, I'd really appreciate it if you'd come to my office," Hank persisted, "It won't take long."

"Cap," Chet gasped, "I really can't talk about it right now, I have an appointment I really have to go."

"Can you at least give me a clue what's going on here?" Hank pleaded.

"Not right now cap, Please." Chet was begging and Hank reluctantly gave a nod releasing him to go get changed.

The two paramedics and their captain leaned on the hood of the squad in worry as Chet jogged into the locker room. Soon Mike the quiet engineer joined them but no one knew what to say.

"Well," Hank broke the silence. "We have twenty four hours off and then at the beginning of the next shift he will talk to me or, or I'll call in the department shrink."

"Guys come quick it's Chet," Marko called running from the locker room and pulling the compartments of the Squad opened.

"What is it?" Hank asked as his paramedics joined in grabbing some of their equipment followed by the medics from the next shift.

"I don't know, he's doubled over grabbing at his chest and can't catch his breath." Marko reported in shear panic.

They all raced into the locker room carrying gear to find the place empty. Chet's locker was standing open and his uniform shirt was tossed uncharacteristically reckless in the bottom of it but there was no Chet to be found. While they were checking the shower and toilet stalls they heard a car started in the drive and hurried out to see Chet's van pull out with Chet leaning on the steering wheel as he drove wearing his t-shirt.

"Do I try and follow him?" Johnny looked to his captain for advice, orders, anything.

There was a moment of silence as the Captain thought, "He doesn't want to be looked at you'll never catch up to him. You'd probably cause an accident trying."

It didn't really feel like they were off duty, each one of them made several phone calls to Chet's home all of them stopped by once and four of the five of them made two trips to their friends apartment. John had managed to get the manager to open up and let him in and had just swept the place looking for his friend when Cap and Marko came by ready to do the same.

"Do you think he wrecked his van someplace?" John questioned remembering how Chet was slumped over the steering wheel while he was trying to drive.

"I've already called the police they don't have any reports of an accident with his license plates." Hank answered.

"He has been complaining of heart burn off and on for a while do you think it's his heart?" Marko asked

"He was favoring his right side," John tried to remember; "if it was his heart it would be more likely that he would be favoring his left but it's not impossible. Do you know when his last physical was?" John looked to his captain who didn't readily know.

The three of them stood outside Chet's apartment in frustration for several more hours. Finally when the sun went down they gave up and went home but each of them still made several more phone calls before they gave up at midnight and tried to get some sleep in preparation of going on shift the next morning.