Disclaimer: I do not own the School of Rock characters or the Baudelaire Orphans. Whatever I have written is clearly fiction, it has not been researched by Lemony Snicket.
The ASOUE parts are based on the movie and have nothing to do with the books what so ever. The story takes place after Count Olaf escaped from his alleged Wedding and now the Baudelaires have been sent to live with their new guardian Dewey Finn who is somehow down the line related to the orphans. Btw, Dewey has nothing to do with VFD for those who have read the books.
Chapter One
The Baudelaires were in their usual predicament on that murky Monday morning- in the back of Mr Poe's car being taken to their new guardian. They didn't know much about him. All they knew was that his name was Dewey Finn and he was a working musician. In the back of the car on the left was Violet. Violet was 14 and was one of the best inventors around. Anyone who knew Violet could tell she was thinking up inventive ideas when she tied her hair in a ribbon. Violets inventing skills had saved her and her siblings a lot in the past. When they were under Count Olaf's guidance, she had made a sanctuary for her, Klaus and Sunny, so they could get away from all of the problems around them. When they were trapped in Count Olaf's car with the train coming, she had invented a device that moved the tracks so the train didn't hit them. When staying at Uncle Monty's house, Violet had invented a way to give Uncle Monty a message without saying it in front of Stefano aka Count Olaf. And when trapped on the remains of Aunt Josephine's shack above the freezing, dangerous Lake Lachrymose, Violet had thought up an idea that got them across the dangerous remains of the house and onto safe land.
The Middle Baudelaire, Klaus, was sat on the right. He was 12, nearly 13. He had excellent researching skills and had read more books than some adults. As Violet's inventing skills had saved them in the past, so had Klaus' researching skills. He had the idea to move the tracks even though Violet invented the device. He had also decoded Aunt Josephine's suicide note and had found out it contained the message "Curdled Cave". Finally, when Sunny was trapped in a cage, and Violet was forced to marry Count Olaf, Klaus thought about what his older sister would do and managed to invent something to climb up the wall and save Sunny from her cage.
The youngest Baudelaire was Sunny. She was sat in the middle. Sunny was still an infant but had four sharp teeth. As you've guessed, her pleasure was biting things. You may think "biting things? So what?" but Sunny's biting had actually come in handy for the Baudelaires. When they were trapped in Count Olaf's car, it was Sunny who bit the head of the toy elf, and that head was used to hit the device which moves the tracks. Also, at Uncle Monty's house, if it wasn't for Sunny approaching the Incredible Deadly Viper, no-one would have believed the Baudelaires that Stefano murdered Uncle Monty and that it wasn't a snakebite. So, you can see that for her age, Sunny is a remarkable person, or should I say, biter. Although Sunny was a good biter, she still couldn't talk properly, which wasn't expected of someone her age anyway. She spoke in a range of words that only her siblings could translate like "gack" which once meant, "look at that strange figure in the distance."
So the Baudelaires were asleep in the back of the car when suddenly the car stopped, causing the Baudelaires to nearly bash their heads on the seats in front of them. This, obviously woke them up.
"We're here" said Mr Poe who then got out his handkerchief to have a few coughs. "This is…cough…cough…Dewey Finn's…cough…cough…house."
Violet, Klaus and Sunny got out of the car and stared up at where Dewey lived. "This isn't a house," Klaus said. "It's a flat".
"It's so small" Violet whispered. "It must be the size of a bedroom at the Baudelaire Mansion."
"Caki" Sunny replied, which probably meant "I bet it's much nicer inside."
"I hope so" Violet said.
Violet, Klaus and Sunny walked up the steps to the door. "Klaus!" Mr Poe called. "Cough…cough…give me a hand with the…cough…luggage…cough…please."
"Sure" Klaus replied so he walked back down the steps while Violet, with Sunny in her arms, carried on.
Violet put Sunny down and rang the buzzer. "Who is it?" A man asked.
"Erm…" Violet thought maybe she should have waited for Mr Poe but it was too late now. "…This is Violet Baudelaire. I'm here for a Dewey Finn."
"Oh right, he's on the first floor. Just go right up, he's expecting you" replied the man. He must own the shop below, Violet thought.
Violet opened the door and then picked up Sunny. "He's on the first floor!" She called back to Klaus and Mr Poe. "We'll go straight up."
"Ok, and remember to be polite Violet…cough!" called back Mr Poe.
Violet and Sunny went up the stairs and stopped at the first floor. "Well, there's only one door so I guess this is Dewey's place" she muttered to herself.
She knocked on the door but then slightly opened it calling "hello?"
"Come right in" said a voice she guessed was Dewey's.
Violet walked in and saw two men. One was plump and was holding a guitar, the other quite thin reading the newspaper. "Hey dudes, I was just rockin' out with my guitar" said the one who looked plump. "Hey wasn't there 3 people?"
"Yes, he's just bringing up our things." Violet replied. "I'm Violet Baudelaire, nice to meet you."
Dewey was silent for a minute. "What you're holding…" he began. "…Is that a doll, or is it real?"
Violet was quite angry with that comment but didn't say anything. Sunny said "gawar" which meant "I'm Sunny, do I really look like a doll?"
"Awh, isn't that adorable?" Said the man with the newspaper. "Oh I'm Ned by the way. Dewey's flatmate."
"So I guess you're Dewey?" Violet asked looking at the other guy.
"Ye-hah. That's me." Dewey replied.
There was silence for a moment. "Oh this is Sunny, my little sister." Violet said.
"hello" Sunny said.
"Can she speak?" asked Ned. "Properly I mean?"
"No, she just says random words. Only my brother Klaus and I understand her so it might be a bit difficult for you to communicate with her."
Just then, Mr Poe and Klaus came in with all the luggage. Mr Poe put his luggage down and approached Ned.
"Poe" he said sticking out his hand. For once he didn't say where he worked and talk about his job. "You must be Mr Finn."
"Actually I'm Mr Schneebley" Ned replied. "That's Dewey Finn." He said looking at Dewey.
"Oh I am sorry" Mr Poe said, making his way over to Dewey. "Poe" he said again, holding out his hand. Dewey shook it. "Finn" he snarled.
"Right…well cough…This is where I leave you children cough remember cough…cough…you can contact me by phone cough…or by fax. Good day." And so Mr Poe left.
"Wow, he was nearly as fat as I am!" Dewey called. "Dewey!" snapped Ned.
Violet, Klaus and Sunny who had now been put down stood there uncomfortable. They didn't know what to do without being rude but it looked as if Dewey was just gonna sit there playing his guitar again.
"Erm…would you mind showing us around?" asked Violet.
Dewey grunted. "Dewey, this is no way to treat your guests" Ned said. "Come on kids, I'll show you around."
"Me too!" shrieked Dewey who put his guitar down and was now standing up. "There's nothing much to see but lets begin the tour!"
Klaus put down the luggage he had been holding and the three Baudelaires walked up to Ned and Dewey. "First thing you gotta know is that the flat is like one big room. Not separate rooms. Well they are separated, but only by walls and curtains." Dewey said.
The Baudelaires tried to put on a brave face but it looked like Ned knew how they were feeling. "We're sorry it's so small Baudelaires. It's just, we're very poor at the moment and we don't have much money coming in. Dewey gets paid a few cents for rockin' out and I do the occasional teaching job, but that's about it really."
"Meduso!" Sunny shrieked which probably meant, "You're not going to try steal our fortune are you?"
"Of course they aren't" Klaus reassured her. "These are our guardians." Then Klaus remembered Count Olaf. He was their guardian too, but that didn't stop him causing the Baudelaires pain and grief. "I'm sorry, it's just my sister, she thinks you might try to steal our fortune."
Ned laughed. "Sunny, of course not. We've promised to look after you and that's what we're gonna do. Your parents would want us to look after you."
"Excuse me" Violet interrupted. "How are you related to our parents?"
"It's not me, it's Dewey."
The three Baudelaires stared at Dewey. He really didn't look the type to be related to the Baudelaire Parents but he was.
"Dewey?" Violet asked. "How were you related to them?"
Dewey stared at Violet. "To be honest Violet I didn't really know your parents. It was my dad. He knew your grandparents cousins in law. He was like their third cousin."
"Right…" Violet said. "Erm…are you by any chance related to Count Olaf?"
"No, no, no" Dewey said. "I'm on the other side of the family tree to him. Don't worry, I'm not gonna ring him up in the night and say you're here, ha ha."
"Please, finish your tour" Klaus said.
"Sure" Dewey said. "Well this is the main sitting area and over there, that table, is where we eat. That cabinet area over there is like the mini kitchen and behind those curtains is my bed. Well my mattress on the floor."
"Gucci?" Sunny said which probably meant "Where do we sleep?"
"I'm sorry?" Dewey asked.
"She means where do we sleep?" Violet translated.
"Argh…That's the problem." Ned started. "We don't have spare beds so two of you will be on the sofa's and the other…well…there's always my bed." Ned pulled a look as to say "it's not as bad as it sounds."
"You mean with you?" Klaus asked.
"Yes" Ned replied. "I don't think you should Violet as you're a lady and Sunny would probably prefer to be with another sibling so… I guess you can Klaus."
"Don't worry, it's very big" Dewey said. "Patti used to sleep in it you see and she liked to sprawl out."
"Who's Patti?" Violet asked.
"My Ex-girlfriend" Ned said quietly. "But let's not talk about her."
"Oh…I'm Sorry" Violet replied.
"It's ok" Ned said. "We broke up months ago."
"It was for the better" Dewey said. "I was always telling Ned to dump her. She was a right stuck-up cow."
"Dewey! Not in front of the kids!" shouted Ned. "Sorry about that. Dewey's kinda…like that."
"And what's that supposed to mean?" Dewey asked.
"Where's the bathroom?" Klaus asked trying to change the subject.
"Oh it's through there, I'll show you" said Dewey, and the tour resumed once again.
"Yeah, it needs a little TLC but like Ned said. We just haven't got the money."
"I'm really sorry you're having money troubles" Violet said considerately. "If I had the money I'd give it to you but we don't get any of it until I come of age."
"Relax you're children" Ned replied. "You shouldn't pay for things like this. Anyway, instead of talking about the bad things of the house, let's talk about the good things. First of all we have a nice, clean shower which is much nicer than a mucky bathtub don't you think?"
The Baudelaires remembered the several en-suite bathrooms of the Baudelaire Mansion with its delicate hot tubs and gold taps but agreed anyway.
"Oh yeah, Shower's are better…"
"Yeah, they are quicker"
"Clanny!"
"Oh good" said Ned. "Do you like the walls too? We thought the wallpaper was disgusting so we covered it up with all these posters."
"I don't even know who any of these people are" replied Klaus.
"Me neither" said Violet.
Dewey stared at them. "What? You don't know the great Jimi Hendrix? And the story of Sid and Nancy? And…and…the Ramones, Led Zeppelin, MOTORHEAD?"
"Um…no" said Violet and Klaus in unison.
"They are the Gods of Rock!" said Dewey. "How can you not know them?"
"Well they're not exactly our decade of music" Violet replied.
"And besides, with our ordeal, we haven't really had time for music or any fun as a matter of fact" Klaus said.
"Go easy on them Dewey" Ned said. "Remember the School of Rock kids? They started like this and look at them now."
"School of Rock? What's that?" Violet asked.
"They're my band" Dewey said. "And we rock!"
"But, doesn't school give off the fact that it's a band of kids?" Klaus asked.
"It is a band of kids" Dewey replied.
"But, you're in it?" Klaus asked.
Dewey nodded. "Dewey's the main guy" Ned said. "He sings and plays rhythm guitar. The rest of the band are kids."
"I see" Violet said.
"We'll tell you more later" Ned said. "Come on, lets go out for a bite to eat, I'm starved."
"Hey that's my line!" Dewey shrieked.
"Whatever, Come on Kids get your jackets. We're celebrating."
"What?" Sunny asked.
"Erm…we're celebrating we have new flat mates Sunny" Ned shrieked. "Let's go!"
Yeah, sorry it was long. I just got carried away and didn't know where to end, so yeah. REVIEW!