Endings
Disclaimer:- Don't own them just borrowing!
Episode:- None
Pairing:- Jean/Mr Innocent
Rating:- M
Achieve:- http(:/) . /group/rebeccafrontlewisffarchive/
Summary:- As she closed her eyes and let the warm water wash over her, washing him away this time for good she felt confident that no matter what her punishment in the life beyond it would be worth it to finally feel able to move on in this one.
Author's Note:- The third and final story with the same two opening sentences, you don't need to have read the others to read this they aren't connected other than starting the same. This is rated for sexual content and language so if that's not your thing stop now you've been warned! Otherwise enjoy and reviews would be lovely.
He was drunk. If there was a grand cosmic court that took account of your misdemeanours in life and asked you to explain them that would be his defence. She was not so in the same situation she was pretty sure she was damned. When the door knocked that night he was the last person she expected to find on the other side when she opened it. She wasn't even sure why she let him in other than the fact that no matter how much you've grown to hate someone the fact that you spent half your life with them grants them a little courtesy. He'd said he wanted to talk about their son otherwise her hatred might have outweighed that desire to be fair. That was why she'd not closed the door in his face. She'd done it for Chris he was still his father after all. In truth she knew that was no defence for what happened once he was inside. That had nothing to do with her son what she'd done, what she'd allowed to happen had been all about her, about them and what he'd done to her in the past. It had been all about revenge and so she knew damnation was assured.
"Richard if you have an issue with Chris I don't know what you expect me to do about it he's twenty four years old the days when I was able to tell him what to do and not do are long gone." The way he'd turned on his heels, the venom with which he stared at her should have served as a warning but they'd had so many blazing rows before and since their divorce that the only thought that had gone through her head was "here we go again". This time it was going to be different though she just didn't know it yet.
"So the fact he still won't take my calls or even answer a fucking email is nothing to do with you? He always was a Mummy's boy but this is taking the piss. Are you trying to tell me you haven't been getting in his ear about what a bastard I am and how saintly and hard done by you are?" The anger that had immediately taken over had swallowed whole any desire she might have had not to fight with him again as she stared back at him.
"Unlike you I don't use our son as some sort of stick to beat you with Richard if he's still ignoring you then you can rest assured it's nothing to do with me. Hard as it will be for an ego as big as yours to hear we don't spend any of the time we spend together talking about you these days and I have never nor would I ever suggest that he treat you any differently just because you are a lying cheating bastard!" He'd actually sneered, moving too close and breathing the smell of stale scotch into her face as he laughed and for a second she couldn't remember a single reason why she'd ever loved him. The man in front of her wasn't the man she'd married nor the man she'd actually loved for most of their lives together.
"You're so fucking sanctimonious it's sickening."
"And you're so fucking drunk. I think it's time you left I'm sorry Chris hasn't contacted you but that's between you and him. I'm sure Suzanna is wondering where you are that is if it's not past her bed time." She'd genuinely wanted him to go, that much was in her favour she reasoned. The fact that he was so close that their fingers were almost touching was making her skin crawl. She couldn't stand the thought that his presence was again sullying the house they had shared for so long and that she had worked so hard to wipe any trace of him from since he left was almost more than she could take. All that said she could never have been expected to know how the night would end nor what she'd not only let happen but actively participate in for reasons she knew where more than worthy of celestial retribution.
When he'd refused to move, when the effort of trying to stare him down had finally become unbearable she'd been the one to walk away the refuge of moving anywhere even if it was only to the kitchen being more necessary than air at that moment. When he'd followed her however she'd realised he wasn't done yet, he wasn't prepared to walk away until he'd said what he had to she'd accepted that. That had been her first mistake. The fact she ignored the little voice in her head that reminded her he had always been able to push her buttons in any argument, that he would say things she didn't need to hear again and had almost stopped believing had been her second. Yet she'd decided to stand her ground in spite of it all. Another mistake but not the last she'd make that night.
"Don't walk away from me! You could fix this if you tell him to speak to me he will you just don't want to you prefer to be seen as some sort of paragon of virtue. If he knew how hard it was to be married to you he'd give me a fucking medal for not having walked out on you years ago."
"Jesus Richard do you think for a second he doesn't know exactly what you're like? I don't need to bad mouth you to him that's what you don't get. He's not a child anymore and I'm damn sure he doesn't think I'm some sort of saint either but however unhappy you made me toward the end I wasn't the one who cheated! I still believed in the sanctity of our marriage vows. I wasn't the one fucking anything with a pulse!" The argument was old and the emotions nowhere near as raw but yet they never seemed to be able to avoid it and that night was no different as her heart raced and he laughed again the sort of contempt laced laugh that only caused her anger to peak.
"You were never here and when you were you had become such an uptight frigid bitch do you blame me for looking elsewhere? You got more excited about the latest crime stats than about me. As for not cheating who'd have taken you even if you offered yourself on a plate you've spent so long crawling around in the dregs of life it's sucked all the life out of you you're….." her hand had moved on instinct the sound as it made contact with his cheek sending a surge of exhilaration through her that had not diminished as he'd grabbed her wrist backing her toward the wall until she slammed into it with a force that should have brought her to her senses and yet didn't. Nor had she allowed her common sense to step in when he'd kissed her with a forceful violence that left them both breathless. She'd ignored the screaming danger siren going off in her head as he fumbled with the zip at her back and it was drowned out completely by her desire to prove that for all he said he still wanted her when he gave up and pushed her dress around her hips.
The anger and tension in the room had been at such a level that as he tore and her panties and she pushed his trousers and boxers down his legs she wouldn't have told him to stop had they heard the world would end any second. There was nothing tender about the way he grabbed her thighs lifting her toward him as he thrust into her and that was exactly how she'd wanted it. The muttered string if expletives that he's uttered when he was encased deep inside her, the way he'd completely contradicted everything he'd said so far by telling her how good she felt, how much he missed her, how mad she drove him had been her undoing. It had set off a chain reaction that ended in an explosion of fury laced pleasure that left her digging her nails into his shoulders in a way she knew would leave a mark. When he continued to pound into her with a force that verged on painful she'd let him reach his climax as her conscious mind slowly regained control of the situation. She'd smiled as he buried his face in her hair her name forming a rhythmic mantra as he pulsed inside her his grip on her legs weakening with each wave until her feet were back on the floor and he pulled out of her leaning against the kitchen wall for support.
"God Jean you always were a bloody good fuck." The extra time she'd had to recover from her own climax had given her the upper hand as she moved away rearranging her dress before leaning back against the kitchen counter and looking at him unable to stop the satisfied smile that crept over her face.
"You should go and if I were you I'd stay in town tonight rather than going home to Suzanna you were always terrible at not making it obvious that you'd been screwing her when you came home to me." The shock on his face as he fastened his trousers with still trembling hands had left her mentally punching the air in triumph and the fact it was only increased when she moved out of his grasp when he tried to reach for her had made that triumph all the sweeter.
"I don't have to go….we could….. you know old time's sake and all that." At that point it had been her turn to laugh at the fact her still knew her so little and that even though they'd spent a quarter of a century together he still thought she could be so naïve.
"The irony of this is completely lost on you isn't it? You spent years fucking her behind my back and now you're doing the same thing to her. God I almost feel sorry for her she has no idea what she's gotten herself into with you has she?" That was the point at which she'd closed the gap between them again resting her hand on his chest and lowering her voice until it rang with icy calm. "You're right Richard I am a good fuck, I always was, but you chose to forget that. I hope you'll remember tonight though because it'll never happen again. Make sure to close the front door on your way out."
As she walked away leaving him standing alone in the kitchen, mounted the stairs and started a bath running in the en-suite she'd already known she'd signed her own cosmic execution warrant. As she heard the front door close and sank into the hot bath water she'd realised she truly didn't care. She'd spent the last year since they had finally split doubting herself, letting his snide comments about her attractiveness and her desirability chip away at her self-confidence and now she had never felt more confident in her life. She knew the long, possibly endless list of reasons why there was no excuse for what she'd done and more importantly why she'd done it but she could only focus on the smile that she seemed unable to remove from her face and the contented sigh she gave. As she closed her eyes and let the warm water wash over her, washing him away this time for good she felt confident that no matter what her punishment in the life beyond it would be worth it to finally feel able to move on in this one.