Shrek was eating jummy jimmies. But, these weren't just any jummy jimmies. These jummy jimmies had been made with Shrek's own sperm. Shrek had been looking forward to eating his jummy jimmies for days, and today was finally the day they were done incubating. As he ate them, he thought, I won't let anyone take these jimmy jimmies from me. But then, he heard a voice.
"SHREK!" the voice screamed, "GIVE ME THOSE JUMMY JIMMIES"
"NO!" Cried the ogre. Hmm, that was strange. Usually Dora's voice sounded much softer.
"Then, I'll take them." Dora said. Thump, thump, thump. Footsteps. "Giant!" Shrek exclaimed, "Dora is giant; her footsteps were so loud, her voice was so loud." Dora pulled off the roof and reached down. The grabbed the plate of jummy jimmies and ran off. Shrek knew what he had to do.
"OY DONKEY!" he shouted.
Donkey, who had just run up to Shrek said, "Yes, sir?"
"FOLLOW DORA!" Shrek screamed. Donkey started running. And running. And running. They were coming up close behind Dora when she turned around. She smiled at Shrek.
"Do you want your jummy jimmies back?" She said sweetly.
Shrek, in tears now replied, "Yes…"
"Well you can't have them" Dora laughed. Then, with a flash of green lightning, she disappeared. Jummy Jimmies and all.
"Donkey? Take me home to West Virginia, along the country road, to the cliff that I used to sit at as a kid." Donkey nodded and, they were off. Traveling the fastest they could.
Two hours later, they were atop the cliff. Shrek knew that he couldn't bear to wait another two months for the next batch of jummy jimmies. He stood up. He t-posed for the last time and let himself fall over the cliff.
"I know who to call," Donkey yelled, "Shag—," that's all Shrek could hear before he hit the cliff's rocky bottom, and blacked out.
To be continued…