Eleanor can't sleep. While yes, she's always been a restless sleeper, she shouldn't laying in her bed, wide awake at heaven-knows-how-late. She glances at the other side of the bed, and like always, Philip isn't there. She doesn't know if it would make much of a difference if he was.
Rachel Chu has lost to her. On purpose. Only a fool folds a winning hand, she repeats her own words to herself nonsensically. She sighs and flips to her right so she won't be reminded of Philip's unoccupied side of the bed.
She squints in the darkness, even though she won't be able to see anything because it's completely dark. The monkeys around Tyersall Park are silent, and Eleanor wishes for once that they'd scream, hop around the roof, anything to make her stop feeling like such a failure.
Neither of them really won, Eleanor realises. Rachel just lost to prove a point, but what was that exactly? That she was better a better person than her? That she was actually what Nick needed, and that Eleanor wasn't the one Nick needed?
Perhaps she's over-analysing this, and it means nothing at all. Really, it's likely just an act of childish defiance, something to spite Eleanor. But there was a kind of significance in the last, long look she gave Eleanor. Challenging. Surrendering. Impressive.
"I don't need this right now," Eleanor says aloud, to no one in particular. "What I need is to sleep."
Then she stares up at the gold-leafed ceiling before she eventually falls into a turbulent sleep. Eleanor's annoyed that her dreams are no less stressful than reality.
~x~
Eleanor sleeps much better the next night. In fact, she manages to go a whole forty hours without even thinking of Rachel Chu. Then she tries to talk to Nick after breakfast and Rachel Chu's ruining her life again, even from all the way across the world.
"You don't get to do that," Nick tells her furiously, refusing to look at her. His eyes are trained on the green-carpeted staircase to the left, where Eleanor informed Rachel that she'd never amount to anything. "You- you don't get to dictate what I do, who I marry, because you're the one who dumped me with Ah-Ma right after I was born. You gave up your right to tell me what to do." His voice is bitter, and it hurts Eleanor more than she'll ever admit. But she just gives him her most placating smile.
"There's nothing that can be done now," is all Eleanor tells him gently. "She's gone." With that, Nick walks off without a word. Eleanor watches him leave, powerless to stop him. He's right, she supposes, but it still stings.
When she rejoins the table, she smiles tightly as Nadine Shaw excitedly recounts a story about her nephew, and all the ladies burst into raucous laughter. Eleanor doesn't hear her, and barely touches her pineapple tart. She wonders what could have happened if she'd let Nick marry Rachel.
~x~
Eleanor's restless. She's been pacing up and down the cabin of their private jet for the entirety of the flight to New York. She doesn't know why she's worrying, because there's nothing there that she needs to be afraid of. The chances of her running into Rachel Chu are very slim.
Her friends- well, she thinks of them more as travel companions- seem to pick up on her mood. "Aiyah, lah, why so kan cheong?" Daisy Foo pouts. "We're going on a shopping spree. Chanel, Dior, Versace, everything worth buying. We have fittings with Alexander Wang tomorrow!"
"If I were you, I wouldn't spend my money on such frivolous things," Eleanor growls, and that shuts her up. The other ladies speak to each other in exaggerated whispers around her, and Eleanor can't help but roll her eyes.
She really can't believe she associates herself with such hare-brained women, but they are part of the Young family, and work alongside Philip. It would be wise to stay on civil terms with them, especially once Nick inherits Tyersall Park and the Young Corporation. If they're friends, then there'll be less motivation for them to try to steal what was rightfully her son's- and they were fully aware of who she was, and the things she was capable of, if any of them dared to step out of line.
Jacqueline Ling, the least stupid of the bunch, offers a cucumber finger sandwich to Eleanor. She reluctantly accepts it. "Eleanor, what's on your mind?"
Eleanor sighs. "I'm not sure. I deeply regret agreeing to this."
Jacqueline laughs lightly. "Oh, same here, lah. Carol hasn't stopped for air once so far, won't stop lamenting about Bernard and how much she prays for him." They both shared a chuckle over this.
"It's Nick," Eleanor says. "I don't know what to do with him. He's so angry with me, it's been something like two months, and he won't talk to me."
Jacqueline makes a sympathetic noise. "Ah. I've given up with Amanda, good-for-nothing girl doesn't ever visit Singapore. Haven't heard from her since the Khoo wedding." Eleanor smiles bitterly. "At least she doesn't hate you."
"I don't think Nicky is capable of hating anyone," is Jacqueline's amused reply. "Let alone you. Give it time, he'll come around."
Eleanor nods. "Thank you, Jacqueline."
"Anytime, lah."
It isn't until they touch down in New York that Eleanor realises that she's miraculously more concerned about Rachel Chu than she is about Nick.
~x~
Eleanor's immensely relieved she doesn't have to share a room with anyone. They'd all learned their lesson on their trip to Jeju-do last summer, when Carol thought it would be "cute" to share a cabana with someone. It was not cute, and a squabble over who was using all the Wi-Fi nearly resulted in bloodshed.
Once Eleanor gets settled in, she checks her phone, and grimaces when she sees all the messages from Nadine, Daisy, Jacqueline, Lorena, and Carol. They want her to join them for dinner. Eleanor types back quickly to stop the barrage of texts.
I won't be joining you for dinner, I have other plans. Have a nice evening. - Eleanor
Her phone promptly explodes with a torrent of outraged messages, and pursing her lips, she simply shuts her phone off. Eleanor won't be needing it for a while, her driver is already waiting for her outside, and she plans on going to see Rachel Chu.
Eleanor's been trying her best to avoid this, which is ridiculous. If she wants this fixation with the girl to end, she needs to confront the problem. There's just something about the thought of Rachel that makes her stomach clench unpleasantly. She knows that in a way, this is stupid, and frankly a waste of time, but she desperately needs closure. This girl, this commoner, has been the epicentre of her life for the past three months, and Eleanor intends to make her pay.
~x~
"What are you doing here?" Rachel asks. Eleanor can't detect any anger, or bitterness in her voice. The girl's head is tilted at her, her expression curious, but not hostile. Interesting.
"I don't know," is the only answer Eleanor can supply. She's here to tear down Rachel, but she can't bring herself to. Or maybe that's not why she came at all, and that's only what she's been telling herself to justify this.
"Oh."
Eleanor stares at Rachel, whose gaze is equally intense. "I was wrong about you."
Rachel looks surprised. "What part were you wrong about?" Her eyes narrowed. "Was it that I'll never be enough? That I'm not what Nick needs, or that I'm garbage because I didn't come from a rich, snobby family like you?"
"No," Eleanor's voice comes out quiet. "No. I was wrong about you. You aren't enough. You're more than that, in fact."
Rachel doesn't say anything for a while. Neither does Eleanor. They're not looking at each other.
"Okay," Rachel says slowly. "You have more to say, I'm pretty sure you didn't come here just to tell me that. What else is there?"
Eleanor exhales. "I've been thinking about you a lot recently." Her face is getting warm, and she think she might be blushing. She doesn't remember the last time she's blushed.
"How much?"
"Too much," Eleanor sighs. "Every second of the day for the past couple of months." Her heart is beating faster than it should.
Rachel raises an eyebrow. "Really? Hm." Eleanor wishes she knew what Rachel was thinking, so that she knew what to say to her.
Then to her shock, Rachel says, "I've been thinking about you too. Maybe not every second of the day, but still pretty often."
"Really? Hm," Eleanor says mockingly, which elicits a smile from Rachel. "Yeah. But I don't know. It's been a weird couple of months, and nothing has seemed real since spring break." She rolls her eyes. "It only took one week for my whole life to fall apart."
"I'm typically a good judge of character," Eleanor says, even though she knows that it has nothing to do with the conversation they're having now. "I thought I knew who you were, but I didn't. I still don't."
"If it's any consolation, I don't know who the hell you are either, lady." Rachel pauses. It's clear she has more to say, but it looks like she's debating whether or not she should. "We should get to know each other better."
"And what exactly would that entail?"
"I'm still trying to figure that out," Rachel admits. "But whatever it is, we can figure it out together, right?" She gives Eleanor a small smile, one that's warm and sincere.
Eleanor thinks of Philip. She thinks of Su-Yi, Nick, her family, her social circle. They'd all urge her to say no, to turn down Rachel's- proposition. That's been her whole life, to ask herself what other people expect from her, what everyone else thinks of her. She's tired of it.
"Yes," Eleanor replies, and with one word, she feels freer than she's ever felt in her entire life. "Yes, we can."
