AN: This was originally written about two of my original characters, but I re-read through it and decided it fit Randy and Ted. So I changed the names and other things and here we are! Enjoy!
If I couldn't sleep could you sleep?
Could you paint me better off?
Could you sympathize with my needs?
I know you think I need a lot.
I started out clean but I'm jaded,
Just phoning it in,
Just breaking the skin.
Bent - Matchbox Twenty.
I could feel the trickle of blood running as I slid the blade down my arm. I don't know how I got this way. I was a normal teenage boy before he came along.
I remember the first time I met him; I was a freshman in high school while he was a junior. I sat behind him in my advanced English literature class. On the first day, he turned around and smiled that gorgeous smile of his. His silver blue eyes sparkled with mischief before he turned around to face the front of the class.
As the year went on, Randy and I got closer and closer. Randy spent more time facing the back of the class instead of the front. My grades started to plummet, but I didn't really mind. Nothing my mom or dad could say could keep me away from the blue eyed boy that became my obsession.
The first time Randy asked me to hang out with him outside of school was to go to a junior party. I eagerly said yes, watching his blue eyes sparkle with that mischief I saw on the first day I met him. I lied to my parents, saying that I was sleeping at a friend's house. They would've never allowed me to go to a party much less a junior party.
When I arrived, he greeted me with a hug and a slurred 'Ted you made it' fell from his lips. He offered me a red plastic cup filled with an unknown liquid. Timidly, I took a taste, the amber liquid running down my throat, burning it. I sucked it up since I wanted to impress him. It seemed like it worked since he was grinning at me and pushing another red cup in my hand.
I don't remember much of that night besides Randy pushing red cups upon red cups into my hand. Not long after I arrived was I drunk; a slurring, stuttering mess. And in that mess, I didn't noticed the smirk on his lips and the smug look he gave to his friends.
He grabbed my hand just as I finished my last drink. I looked to see our fingers laced together and I couldn't help but getting the feeling of butterflies erupting in my stomach. He lead me upstairs, passing many couples making out in the stairs and in the halls. I think I murmured something about how he had pretty eyes. Randy lead me to an empty bedroom and my intoxicated mind didn't register what was happening.
I was sat on the edge of the bed, giggling like a school girl, watching through blurry eyes as he locked the door. I still didn't register what was happening.
Randy strode over to me, sitting down next to me on the bed. He looked like he had sobered up considerably. His hand made its way to my knee slowly tracing its way up my thigh. I couldn't help the shiver that went down my spine. His lips crushed against mine while he moved me to lay down on the bed.
The next morning, I woke up alone in a bed that wasn't mine and a room that wasn't mine. I had a pounding headache and my whole my body was sore. I quickly gathered up my discarded clothes from the floor before rushing to the bathroom.
I vowed to myself as I walked down the stairs, clutching my aching head, that I would never drink again in my life. My vows were stopped short as I heard laughter come from the living room. I peeked around the corner to see Randy and all his friends sitting there.
"So, dude, did you go through with it?" A boy with shorn blonde hair questioned.
"Yeah." Randy smirked, "It was so easy to get him drunk. He is so naive."
"Isn't he, like, in love with you?" Another boy with a blonde fauxhawk asked.
"I have him wrapped around my finger."
"Freshman's are so gullible." A boy with long brown hair laughed.
I stood there shocked. All this time he was using me for some stupid bet. He never cared about me. He never wanted to be my friend. All I was to him was just meaningless sex. I couldn't help the salty tears that ran down my cheeks.
I quickly ran from around the corner, slipping on my pant leg as I went by, but that was the least of my problems. I just wanted to get out of there, away from him. Randy stood as he saw me running to the door.
"Ted!" He yelled.
"Don't," I said, walking out the front door and slamming it behind me.
The rest of the weekend I spent crying in my room. I couldn't help that I had fallen for him. His silver blue eyes lured me and trapped me in. I had fallen and I wasn't sure if I could get out of the spell he put me in.
When I walked into my English class on Monday, I didn't make any contact with Randy. I could feel his eyes on me as I swiftly walked passed him and sat down in my seat.
During the whole class period, he kept looking back at me, a sympathetic smile on his lips. I knew he could see the bags under my eyes and the emptiness that reflected in the blue orbs. I just stared blankly ahead, the teachers ramblings going in one ear and out the other.
I quickly got up when the bell rang, gathering my notebook and my messenger bag off the floor. I tried to get out of there as quick as possible but the warm fingers that wrapped around my wrist stopped me in my tracks.
"Ted," he whispered.
I winced; I hated the way he said my name. I hated how he made it roll off his tongue so easily.
"What?"
"I'm sorry about Friday night. I'm sorry that I hurt you. That was the last thing I wanted to do."
"Well you did."
"How much did you hear of that conversation?"
"Enough."
"Ted," he sighed.
I winced again, but this time it was because my mind flashback to that night. I shuddered.
"Ted," he repeated, "I know you'll never forgive me but please just think about it."
I meekly nodded before snatching my wrist out of his hand and walking out of the classroom.
Which brings me to where I am right now in the boys' bathroom, watching the blood run down my arm and land in the porcelain sink. I skipped my next class which was math to be here. I had math with him and I didn't want to spend another forty-five minutes staring at the back of his head.
"Ted?" Randy's voice floated through the bathroom. I looked up in panic; I didn't want him to know that I had cut myself because of him.
I watched through the mirror in horror as Randy walked around the corner. His blue eyes widened in shock before he came to stand beside me. The shock that was in his eyes was quickly replaced with anger as he took the blade out of my hand and threw it in the sink.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" he shouted, "Why are you doing this?"
"Why do you think I'm doing this?! I'll give you a hint; this person used me."
"You're cutting because of me?" he questioned in a whisper.
"Don't act so surprised about it!"
"But why?"
"In case you haven't noticed I'm in love with you and to know you used for some bet broke me."
What happened next shocked me; he took my arm with the cut on it and placed it up to his lips. He placed soft, gentle kisses on the cut while his blue eyes stared into mine.
"I'm sorry," he murmured with every kiss.
The kisses moved up my arm to my shoulder to my neck and then finally to my lips. This kiss was different to the one we shared that night. This was softer, gentler and not needy and hurried.
"Do you forgive me now?"
"...Yes."