AN: Hello, My name shall be confidential, my nickname however is Craig (yet i'm not the role of craig in this story). And i'm about to tell you about the fucked story of my life. As the title says, there's no happy ending in this shitshow. I just wanted to show you all the caliber of how hard this story hits home. I will be represented as tweek in this story, and i'll be going over the hopeless romance, depression, abuse, destruction, and uncontrollability in my life. Due to my grades and my stress, I'm probably going to be very slow posting this.
Just an FYI, this story is rated T right now, but could easily be changed to M if i want to go deeper into the hellhole of my sadness. As a Homosexual male, i wanted to find a way to stay anonymous (ish) online and tell my story and ask for anyone's advice. I also wanted to be heard by a community of people who could give me support and hope. There may be typos here and there because I'm not a poet, I'm a stressed out and fucked up individual.
I want to tell you all to keep your head up and spread positivity because one positive remark can possibly be the deciding factor of a life. Although I never have wanted or ever will take or harm my own life, I am in a hole of negativity - depression, and it's very difficult to climb out of it. So I want all of you to be the hand who helps lost individuals like me out of this deep hole, because with someone by their side, you can pull someone out of the depression they have been snared into. Thank you for reading this, and enjoy the (slightly changed for personal reasons) Story of my life…
Also, yes, I am actually strongly addicted to caffeine.
x
Chapter 0 - The rundown (prologue)
"The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from enemies, it comes from those you trust the most." XXXTENTACION
"Fuck!" another flunked grade. Unlike me, I can tell everyone else in my class had a good result by their smiles. I looked down at the D minus on my paper, written with red sharpie that still lingers with the smell of a normal sharpie. Kenny, sitting to my right, can see that I did pretty bad either through my expression of shame or just that the sharpie bled right through the paper.
"So… Tweek. how'd ya do?" He asked. Honestly I bet he honestly already knows. Fucking twink.
"Oh, F-Fucking swell" I was being sarcastic. I always have the want to just be a dick. It's in my blood. I probably got it from my dad - Fuck, he's gonna be pissed.
"So judging by that stutter you had there, I'd say you're lying." Classic Ken. Just wanting to be a nosy prick.
Kenny is kind of - well actually - one of my only friends, Well he's the one I actually Hang out with and see often. Kenny and Craig are practically my only friends, But Craig hasn't been at school recently. Actually I haven't seen him at all in the last 3 weeks. Kenny hasn't either. It's almost like he has disappeared. It scares me a bit that he's been gone this long.
Craig has been my crush, the one I believed was perfect, but he was in a relationship with Red, They actually have been together for like 3-4 years… I don't really remember how long, but the "love boat" turned into a "love Titanic" and hit a massive fucking iceberg of lying and cheating and as much as I can try to feel bad for them, I really can't, because he's single now. I can go for the guy I want.
"Wake up Dumbass!" It was Kenny, I slept through Math - again, fuck. I wake up and we part ways to get to our last period class.
I've been on withdraw from trying to quit coffee, but it just doesn't work, at all. Either I gotta live Like the jittery mess I was, or the grumpy Piece of shit I am right now. I hope this period lasts longer. I don't want to go home, My dad is a cunt. That's why mom left him. He's an abusive piece of shit. Usually drinking or something. I just need to get out of his sight for tonight.
*Money Shot.* That was my phone. Why am I getting a Text in class? And also, Yes my ringtone is IDubbbz, He's funny in my opinion so fuck off.
I check my phone to see Craigs name. My heart skipped a beat. I open up the text to see what it says
"Dude, after school go to my house, its urgent." Urgent, that word scares me. I'm Probably overreacting, but still Urgent gives me a bad vibe, welp that's my one way ticket out of the beatdown my dad may give me when I get home.
The last bell rings and that means it's time to GTFO of here, it's friday and as much as I love the protection from my dad it gives, I'm sick of just doing nothing for 7 hours straight a day. Also I need to go to Craigs house.
I put in my apple earbuds, and turn on my playlist. It consists mostly of X (LLJ), lil Uzi, and Kodak. I hit play and listen. Music usually drowns out my pain, my stress - My depression.
"Father forgive me, for you know that I'm always sinning
I take no interest partying with liquor, fucking up my system
Excuse my language that's a hang up on how shitty I been feeling
I'm sorry I feel no attraction, I know that it's been a minute"
I Enter Craig's house, his Dad greets me at the door, he looks stressed or fucked up on something, I don't know. Turns out Kenny and Bebe are there too. Bebe has been with Kenny for only like a week, and you can tell that that relationship is going to turn into relation-shit. Kenny can't keep a relationship for longer than a month, he usually just falls for a girl then just realizes a month in that they are a total dickbag. Wendy was one of those girls.
My music is still playing in my ears but it's very quiet. Craig's dad explains that he was the one who texted us. He wanted to tell us something that resulted in me hiking all the way over to his house to tell us something about - oh fuck - Craig...
"I wanted to bring you two - er - three over here to tell you something about Craigs absence, and I W-want to affirm that he's in good hands." He stops because of a whimper. Fuck - this is bad.
"Craig… Craig has an aggressive form of Leukemia."
I was at a loss of words, my jaw was dropped, I didn't know what to say. Craig, The Varsity Football star QB, The Most popular person I know. The most - Stunning - Person I know has leukemia.
"I said I'm so in love with someone, ohh ohh ohh ohhh, yea yea
I said I'm so in love with someone, ohh ohh ohh ohhh ohhhh, yea yea"
I Had multiple shitty days in my life, more bad than good, but this, this was the worst day, by far.
AN: I'm going to stop there, it's too much to type, expect me back in a couple of weeks. Thank you for reading this, as this hurts me to type every character into this masterpiece of my pain. Please review, give me motivation to go on with this Story, because I love writing. It soothes me. Even writing about my pain helps.
Song Lyrics: Xxxtentacion and Shiloh Dynasty - Angels.
Word Count: 1313
Pages: 5
Edit: IDK If I'll continue we'll find out sooner or later