Author's Notes: First of all hey guys!
This is a fiction I began to write after the inspiration struck me while listening to Skylar Grey's song Words
It's the most beautiful song I heard in a while so check it out!

Important: This is set in a time where Akashi and Furihata have graduated and are a pair for some years now. And the remaining things you'll find out while
reading? :33

I hope you'll enjoy reading this!


~Furihata's P.O.V.~

His steps were fast. Why had he told him to go, to go on this trip? Why had he done that? Akashi had always been on his side since he had confessed to Furihata. Since both of them knew that they were that one person for each. That one person that kept the other alive. That one person that understood the other without words. That one person that completed the other.

Why had he wanted him to go for the first time since Akashi was his. To go and have fun with others. A tear slipped past Furihata's lashes as he swung the doors open to the hospital, ran to the reception asking, asking for Akashi while clinging to the desk of the woman speaking with him. She told him to calm down that he couldn't see him not now, not now. That just relatives were allowed in. Furihata cried and shouted. Shouted for the first time at someone he did not know. He shouted that he was his boyfriend though he normally kept it a secret. Cried out to let him see Akashi -his Akashi- to let him finally, finally see his boyfriend's face.

The woman was calm, she was so calm. It made no sense. It was like she was laughing at him with this calm face and stature. He slammed his fist on the desk once again demanding to know which room Akashi was. How he was doing. That he wanted information, that he needed information. That he needed to see his boyfriend, his Akashi. That he needed him in his life. The woman lost bit by bit her composure he could see it in her eyes. How she looked around as to show him that they were being watched. But Furihata couldn't care less. He needed to know. After all Akashi... Akashi was that one person that made him feel alive. He was that one person that made him love everything. Furihata broke down. He didn't even feel the desk that met his forehead when everything turned black around him.


He woke up in a room. In a white and sterile room it reeked of medications. Reeked of death and despair mixed with a little bit of hope. He closed his eyes and opened them again, he was lying in a bed, he was just lying in it not moving for a moment. Slowly straightening up he tried to remember, tried to remember the things before everything went dark and they did come back, bit by bit, slowly and cruel. The phone call of a trustworthy and understanding servant of Akashi. That one servant which kept their secret hidden from Akashi's father.

That call which shattered his world. That one call that had sent him through a whirlwind of despair. He remembered bit by bit how he took shaky breaths and nearly lost his mind at home but he could pull himself together, ask for a taxi, get in, drive to the hospital, pay the driver and then he had run, run to the doors that kept Akashi -his Akashi- he had swung them open. Cried, shouted and he remembered. Tears streamed down his face.

Cars really were death machines. Why would people built such canes filled of danger. Why would those be produced to take lives. Weren't those things there to ease people's life? Weren't those there to help the people to get their shit together? Why would those take lives. Why his live. Why this live. Why this one life he needed the most. He cried, cried and stood then up. Some nurse in the corridor gave him a sympathetic look as to show how sorry she was for him, but he, he didn't give her even a second glance as he made his way once again to the front of the hospital. His fist once again met this desk, this desk of this merciless woman to get her attention.

"Please I need to see him..." Furihata begged his voice broken, so broken while he spoke. "I need to see him... please I beg you please..." This time he begged, he begged to see him. He did not cry. He did not shout.

"Look I do understand your situation but I cannot give you any information. Not until I'm sure who you are. He is from the Akashi family. They are running a big company and people might have grudges against them... Also his father had made a request just to let in people he authorized. I'm sorry..." The woman looked away.

And this time after his mind finally could think partly straight, after he had shouted through utter despair to the brink of breaking his own sanity. He saw it she was not evil. No, she just did her job. But still he needed to know, he needed to know. He just needed to know so bad. If that meant to beg Akashi's father he would do so. If it meant to tell Akashi's father about their relationship he would do so. He would do so many things just to see him. He needed to know how he was doing. If he could recover. If he was awake. If he would wake up...

"Ah... If that isn't Furi-kun." An older male said as his eyes glued on the teen's face "I bet you are here to see Akashi-san." A smile, he flashed a smile.

And Furihata knew he would get to see Akashi, he knew he would get to see his love, his life, his mind and heart. He nodded looking at this man with begging eyes. He was the servant Akashi trusted the most, who knew about his and Akashi's relationship. Furihata knew that this man -Akira- would take him to Akashi. To his other half.

"Miss I know this young man. He can get inside. And I think you do know me." Akira turned to the woman behind the reception and smiled at her.

"Yes of course I know you Akira-san. If you know him I have nothing to be concerned about as Akashi-sama had told me that you are trustworthy person who will look after Akashi-san a lot when he cannot."

Akira nodded and smiled at the woman before he began to walk away to the corridors on the right. Behind him was Furihata following him through those bright lit corridors. Their path was silent, as silent as it was at a funeral. Not saying anything until Akira stopped in front of a door with a small window on it. When Furihata looked through that little window he could see a single bed, a single bed near the window that looked to the gardens of this hospital. With a gulp Furihata reached for the doorknob and when his fingers met the cold metal a shiver ran down his spine. That piece of metal was so cold, his body and mind felt as cold as this piece of metal when his fingers wrapped completely around it. His mind and body felt numb, so numb. The door opened nearly on its own when Furihata pushed the knob down. He stepped inside. Slow, careful steps as if he was scared to wake Akashi up. Step for step he neared the bed his eyes glued on the white sheets until he noticed another frame beside the bed. A strong one, with board shoulders, sitting crouched. Maybe for the first time in his life this always straight spine was bent. Furihata neared this figure until he was standing beside this sitting and broken man.

"He will never wake up." Was the first sentence that left this man's mouth when Furihata was standing beside him and then he turned his head towards Furihata, looking up in those hazel eyes. "Never wake up again. The doctors said so. His organs are kept alive from those machines you see there." He jerked his head towards it and then a bitter laugh was to hear, its clang was pathetic. "Did you know that this kid was full of life when his mother was still alive?" The man spoke on not stopping while his gaze returned to Akashi. "He never wanted to learn and be best my wife would always tell. But he learned willingly I was so convinced that he was happy with the things as they were. He was so successful with everything he did." A pause, as a shaky breath escaped his lips. "I was so proud of him since he was born. Even after his mother's death he kept being strong. Even so I did so much wrong things. Even so I forced so much on him." Another shaky breath was released before he looked once again up to Furihata. "You know I never saw the mistakes I did. Just searched some on him. Forced him to learn and to be perfect even though I wasn't. And I just see this now after everything is too late. Am I not pathetic?" The man smiled a heartbreaking, sad smile. "Say something boy. You love him, don't you? And he loved you, didn't he?"

Furihata's reddened eyes widened before he nodded silently, not tearing his eyes away from this man.

"Yeah I knew about your relationship though nearly Akira and Seijuurou had fooled me. But in the end I still knew my son and the ones who work under me. I let someone follow Seijuurou as he once again had one of those sudden errands to finish and this man I hired saw how my son bought flowers for you and kissed you. How you two would hold hands when you thought nobody could see you. I wanted to break things up, if anything, if even one of his grades dropped but they didn't. He became even more excellent. Worked with much more vigor. So you, you had been this person who could make him laugh genuinely once again a long time after his mother died. So I let it happen and pretended I didn't know anything about your relationship..." The man looked back to Akashi, his head hanging after a while. "You boy, you did what I could've never done. You made him smile and love his life once again."

After this nothing was to hear anymore from the man. Just those beeping sounds of the machine, of this machine which was keeping Akashi alive. It was funny all this what Akashi's father had told. Would have Akashi known then they never had to have secrets from anyone. Just the fear of Akashi's father's power kept them from telling the world of their relationship. Because Akashi never cared what people would have thought about him, if the media got to know that the big Akashi heritage was in a relationship with another man.

Furihata said nothing as his eyes trailed back to Akashi who was lying there so broken, his Akashi, who always had been so strong and just let his strong facade down when Furihata was there. When they were alone and Akashi was tired once again, so tired from all the demands his father made. Someone would think after Akashi finished school his father wouldn't have as much power over him but it was the opposite. The pressure increased as he became more and more work so that he was ready to take the company over in a short amount of time.

He had been tired and Furihata had known, he had been the only one to know that Akashi was exhausted. He neared the bed a little more reached out and brushed those hands which had held him more than just once. Which had hugged him when he needed it. Which had caught him when he was about to fall. Tears slipped past his lashes and he cried once again. He cried silently not even caring about the two people in the room. He begged, he begged the gods that Akashi should wake up. He begged Akashi that he once again should be strong and wake up. He begged the stars, the sun, the moon that a miracle should occur. He held this hand and begged and begged in his mind -his vision blurry. Until he felt something touching his shoulder and he turned around not letting go of this hand.

"We will leave you alone for some time. Akashi-sama needs to take a rest and he told that he was sure you would keep a good eye on Akashi-san. He will inform the nurses that you will stay here."

Furihata nodded, nodded and looked after them. How the door closed slowly and his surroundings darkened -he hadn't even realized that it was night by now. He wondered if Akashi was seeing a darkness like this one. If he could hear anything around him. The darkness, the loneliness settled down making Furihata's heart ache with more and more realization. And he took this hand brought it up to his lips kissed it and cried. Feeling how this hand dampened with every tear that got past his lashes. He kissed this hand begged but this time he spoke up. He spoke with the gods begging them again and again and again to give him his Akashi back. To give him back that one person who completed him. His cries didn't stop until he couldn't cry anymore until he felt that there wasn't even one drop of tear left to squeeze out. Not letting go of Akashi's hand Furihata cleaned his face from the tears with his other sleeve.

"Akashi there were things I wanted to tell you before encouraging you to go with your colleges. Things like please stay but I figured that once in a while you should go out with people who are not me and have some fun with them. I wanted to tell you to come over so that we could watch one of those sappy movies you always find so boring. Which I mostly just chose so that you'd get bored and distract me with tickling and eventually ending in bed with you. I bet you knew that I always had that in mind when I called you over for a movie and it was some sappy, clichè movie." Furihata laughed shortly. "You know another thing I never told you was on that day we watched the stars after we had dinner in a really classy restaurant. Where I felt so out of place in my jeans but you ignored the stares we received. No. You looked so proud as you ordered our meal."Another shaky laugh escaped Furihata's lips. "The thing I never told you then was that those stars remembered me of you. Those shone against the eternal darkness that surrounded them. That their shine was even to see light years away on the earth. I could bet that on some planet really far away from ours they see you glow and shine against the darkness that was deep inside your heart created from your own father and life." His broken voice sounded down as Furihata nuzzled Akashi's hand and listened to the even beeping sounds.

Knowing that Akashi's heart was beating. Beating for now though he would never wake up again. "I didn't tell you so many things. How some old guy grabbed my butt in the train because I knew you would've killed him even though I wouldn't have been capable to describe his face." Furihata kissed Akashi's hand smiling against it before he spoke on. "You know it kinda is funny... All this here. I had never thought that I would be the one to stay alive after you ended up this way. Because you are so brilliant while taking on every person on this planet to show that you can win if you try. After all you always trained and worked the hardest. And I have to know since I often enough had tried to distract you from those works. But you'd never let me. You'd always finish those works before finally taking your time with me." Furihata smiled against Akashi's hand once again as he ended his sentences.

He laid Akashi's hand carefully back to its former position screeching the chair slowly towards Akashi's face. He hadn't had the confidence to look into his face, to see those otherwise open eyes closed for eternity. He looked at Akashi's face. It had just scratch-marks on some places it didn't even look like he had anything that would bind him to bed for en eternity. Furihata looked in his face. Waiting for some twitch of an eyelid so that he could call the nurses to tell them that a miracle occurred. That Akashi would wake up again. And really he could swear that there had been a twitch. But he knew, he knew that it was impossible.

With shaky hands Furihata reached for those red bangs that were on Akashi's face and messy in all directions. It was strange to see Akashi like this with messy hairs. Those hairs were normally just like this when the man just woke up. Furihata smiled unwittingly at those memories. He brushed carefully through Akashi's hairs realizing more and more that soon enough the warmth that radiated from Akashi would stop to warm his hands and heart. He would turn as cold as that metal doorknob after some time. Furihata closed his eyes feeling the tiredness that covered his mind and limbs in a fluffy feeling of cotton which slowly and evenly lulled him and dragged him bit by bit in a cold darkness while pretending that this darkness wasn't as scary or sad. One last time he would lay his head beside the one of Akashi and spent one last night with him in silence and grief. Ever so slowly this feeling of cotton wrapped him more and more when his head met the mattress of Akashi right beside the man's waist. The beeping sounds dulled slowly until he too was wrapped in darkness and silence.


~Akashi's P.O.V.~

He had been on his way home. Finally being able to see Furihata -his Furihata. The trip had been nice and he really had some fun though he still would have appreciated it more if he could have spent his free-time with his boyfriend. So many things were on his mind that he could do with his love but then suddenly a screeching sound pierced through the air and the last thing Akashi felt before everything turned black was, that something hit his head.


A beeping sound greeted Akashi's mind. He could hear it and he knew that he had to be in a hospital. Realization hitting him that he had a car accident but he still wanted to see his Furihata so he tried to open his eyes strangely they did not open. He was not shoved in the bright lights of a hospital. It was quite the opposite it stayed dark and soon enough he realized bit by bit that he felt nothing, not his eyes, not his limbs. Scared. Akashi was for the first time scared as he was left alone in the darkness that surrounded him. Just hearing those sounds around him beeping and beeping. He was left in a lonely, cold, dark world. A while passed where he listened to those beeping sounds which reflected his heartbeat. Where he tried to calm his mind. Until he heard some shuffles and rustles beside the beeping. People were in the room, in his room, beside him and he could not reach out to them. Could not speak to them. He could do nothing. He was helpless. Soon enough the room was filled with silent murmurs which reached his bed. Bits of sentences he could not hear every word and not the whole sentence but he knew what they spoke about. It was him. How someone told that he would never wake up. That he was dead, just kept alive by machines. But for the sake of everything that breathed and lived, Akashi could hear them. He wanted to reach out to them. To say that he was there and alright. But no! Nothing... Neither his finger twitched nor his eyelids fluttered open, he just couldn't feel them, not anymore. He just laid there straight on his back not moving, not feeling anything beside his mind and hearing those sounds around him. A chair screeched the floor and someone slumped in this chair.

"Son I hope you know that I am proud of you and always will be. It is ridiculous how easy those words are to say when knowing you won't hear them."

But father I am here Akashi wanted to scream from his lungs. But no... Nothing left his mouth just silence and those beeping sounds filling the room. Silence and occasionally shaky breaths and some pleads were to hear, just those from his father and Akashi knew that this was his father's way of crying. Trying to stay calm and collected outside the house. The silence his father kept was just disturbed when someone else came inside and his father spoke up Silently telling how Akashi would never open his eyes again and Akashi listened as well as the other person in the room. How he told about Akashi's mother and that he had made mistakes while keeping pushing Akashi and then about love he spoke about Akashi's love and about relationships and that he knew. Knew everything about him and Furihata. It was ridiculous how Akashi had tried to keep it a secret from his father. He had known from the beginning, Akashi's mind told him and still now, too learn it now had no meaning. Not anymore. Akashi wanted to laugh. To do anything, to give a sign of life but he couldn't he could just feel his mind. Just hear everything around him... Nothing else.

Noticing things like the room emptying after a while. Leaving him alone with Furihata -with that one person he loved the most. He heard the cries of his loved one as he started to cry. He heard the begs that left his mouth after thinking he was alone. And it broke Akashi's heart it broke his still somehow functioning mind to hear those begs and cries which demanded for some miracle again and again and again. Akashi wanted to say that he was still there, alive and awake. That he could hear him. He wanted to take his only love in his arms and embrace him firm until those cries died down. But eventually they did on their own Akashi couldn't feel any of his body parts he just could hear as Furihata told him, told him things he maybe never would get to hear if he still was awake. He heard the ridiculous comparison with the stars and the maddening crime of that old geezer touching his Furihata.

But the one, the one confession which broke his heart the most was that Furihata hadn't want him to leave for this trip and he hadn't heard it from his lover's tone of voice. He wanted to embrace him so badly he wanted to feel his limbs and finally control them again but it was no use. No determination, no power in his body could let that happen and so he was lying there listening to the even breaths of Furihata. Knowing from the rhythm of those breaths that his boyfriend was asleep. His mind felt like sleeping without sleeping everything was dark and the only thing he wanted was to stand up and hold his dear Furihata. There were so much things he wanted to confess too. Things like how he wanted to marry Furihara how he was jealous of anyone who got two meters too near to Furihata. Confess that not Akashi was the star. No. That Furihata had been the star to fight against the gloom in Akashi's heart.

But as always people regretted the way everything turned out. That they couldn't put in words what they really felt. And Akashi, Akashi felt so many things around Furihata that if he would write a novel about it, it would still not be enough. The last thing he had wanted in his life or death was letting Furihata go through such a painful sight like this. His mind was racing and he heard this beeping. This maddening beeping which made him want to go berserk. The next day broke he could hear it. That nurses got inside. That visitors came inside. This would go on for a while now -this turmoil- but what he also knew was that Furihata would be there all the time.


Days, weeks, months, years had passed by. Akashi did really not know how much time had passed. The only thing he cared for in those days was Furihata's voice as he would tell about his stories. What he had done at work or which animal he had seen in the park. How the clouds looked like while walking towards the hospital and Akashi would be hypnotized; mesmerized by those words which left the brown-haired man's mouth -they were beautifully detailed. On this day someone else beside Furihata visited. Steps clicked on the floor, whispers, more steps and then the door closed behind them. They were probably speaking outside. After all Akashi did not hear them, could not hear them. He was left in the darkness he was trapped in.

He accepted by now that he could never wake up anymore. That he just could be able to listen to his family and love. After a while of silence and listening to those beeping sounds of his heart, they returned. And Akashi knew, he knew that something was different because Akashi could hear Furihata cry and cry. His Furihata hadn't cried for a long time not anymore after the first days and Akashi heard those cries. It broke his heart that he couldn't do anything but listen. Couldn't even show that he was listening. He heard those cries and then apologies and goodbyes, apologies and goodbyes. Again and again and again. Until it sunk in bit by bit.

Those machines would be turned off Akashi knew and still just listened. He wasn't even able to stop them because he couldn't move, couldn't even show the little bit sign of life inside him. After all though he couldn't respond, he still wanted to listen to his love. He wanted to stay alive in his pathetic form just to feel his desire and love for this man in his mind. But the apologies, begs and goodbyes did not stop and Akashi heard how broken Furihata's voice was. But this time he knew that his end was near. That the nurse was there, his father, his servant. His last hours, minutes, if not seconds. In the last bit of his time he could still hear Furihata, his love, his life, his heart and mind and he wished so much that really some miracle -though he never believed in them- would occur. Which would let him shot up from his lying position but no such thing could happen, not to him, not to him. He heard Furihata cry. The nurse was saying that she would turn off those machines in a little time. But Furihata begged, begged for some more time and was granted he spoke and spoke about how much he loved Akashi about how much he wished that he had died instead of him how much he wanted to hold him one last time and when the nurse said that she was turning the machines off. Akashi smiled in his own mind because he had heard it. He had heard what he wanted to hear from his strong and smart lover, who knew that Akashi would never stop to love him. The last image in his mind was Furihata's smile as he said those words and then-


Just wait for me Sei-kun. When it's time I will once again be by your side.


Author's Notes at the end: I hope you enjoyed my story and I really hope you leave me an opinion of yours as a review I love to read those and they always encourage me to write more stuff.
Also those reviews make me more than just happy !

Much love and I hope you enjoyed this piece!