I do believe our love's in danger
I might as well be loving air
You look at me like I'm a stranger
You look at me like I'm not there
She smiles as he twirls her, leaning into his chest. But he notices the fact that her smile doesn't reach her eyes.
All around him, he sees couples that seem so in love on the dance floor. And though he wants to believe that they are one of them, he isn't too sure.
He excuses himself. And as he makes his way back from the bathroom, he sees her staring into the air. She doesn't even notice him when he's back at her side.
"Hey." He finally says after moments of silence.
"Oh." She says softly, coming out of her trance. "When did you come back?"
He doesn't know what he's supposed to do. He loves her. He wants to make it work more than anything. But he doesn't even know where he's supposed to start. He doesn't even know where to begin.
When he brings up the subject, she brushes it off. She insists that everything is fine. She reassures him that everything is okay. Even though he's well aware that it's not.
I gaze into your eyes of blue
But their beauty is not for me
You're thinking of someone who's gone
You're dreaming of the one you really love
He knows that he's not the one on her mind when she lies next to him in bed at night. She thinks he's reading his book. But every time he flips to another page he glances over at her. She thinks he doesn't notice her staring up at the ceiling as a sigh escapes from her lips.
She doesn't know he knows.
She walks in on him staring at a picture of her. It's from one of her old picture albums she brought when they moved in together. She'd made him put them in the back of the closest.
He had been looking for a pair of shoes when he had stumbled upon them. And out of curiosity he had opened one.
He couldn't help but notice how beautiful her smile was in every single picture. How genuine it looked. How he had never seen it look like that when she was around him.
In the pictures she truly looked happy. Like she was content with the world around her.
"What are you doing?" She asks softly as she comes up behind him.
Her tone surprises him. He expects her to be angry, furious even. He expects there to be at least a little edge in her voice. Even though she had never come right out and said it, he knew that they were not to be looked at. That she had kept them away for a reason.
So needless to say it shocks him when she lays her head on his shoulder and wraps her arms around his neck.
"I kind of fell on them when I was looking for my shoes."
And he smiles when he hears her cachinnating laugher. "Well you are kind of a klutz."
"You look beautiful in this picture." He says tracing his hand over her silhouette on the paper. "You look happy." He adds without thinking and mentally slaps himself for it.
But she doesn't seem to mind. "I was." She says snuggling her head deeper into his neck. "I am." And he waits for her to add the words "Just as happy I was then." But she doesn't.
And when he gets up she takes his spot in the seat.
"Aren't you going to come to bed?"
"Yeah I'll be there in a minute."
And he notices her run her fingers over the arm that is wrapped around her waist.
I made you mine, or so it seemed
Though he is dead he haunts your dreams
I might as well be two foot tall
You never will love me at all
As he kneels in front of her holding out a blue velvet box, he can't help but think if it's the right thing to do. In fact for a moment he thinks he's crazy for even considering it.
There's tears rolling down her face, but he's not sure if they're for him.
Her answer is delivered in the form of a nod and she wraps her arms around him as he gets up off the floor.
This should be one of the happiest days of his life. It should be one of the happiest days of her life. But there's something in the back of his mind telling him that it's not. And he's not sure if that refers to him or her. Though he fears it's the latter.
He hears her tossing and turning at night.
"Klaus." He hears her whimper. "Klaus."
He reaches out to touch her, comfort her in any way he can but finds himself hesitating.
"Stefan no!" She exclaims and her movements turn more violent. "Klaus"
He shakes her awake.
"Klaus." He hears her whisper as her eyes flutter open. But she sees that it's only him.
And so he pulls her to his chest and strokes her hair as sobs rake her body.
He comforts her as she cries over someone that's not him.
She doesn't bring it up the next morning. She doesn't bring it up for the next few weeks.
They go to his parent's house and tell them about the engagement. His parents are ecstatic. They know how much he loves her.
She seems happy. He hears her gushing about the ring to his mother. And it makes him happy to see that her like that.
He thinks that everything is back to normal. But one day he walks into the room and finds her on the floor, her back to him, surrounded by photo albums.
She turns around and his heart breaks.
Her eyes are red and puffy from crying, her mascara's running down her cheeks in streaks. She looks like she's…broken.
"I'm sorry." She whispers before breaking into sobs. "I'm so sorry."
I gaze into your eyes of blue
But their beauty is not for me
You're thinking on someone who's gone
You're dreaming of the one you really love
You're dreaming of the corpse you really love
He doesn't know what he's supposed to do. He doesn't know how to help her.
He knows about him. She had told him when they had first started dating.
He knew that she loved him.
And now he knew that she always would.
"I just miss him so much. I don't know what to do. It hurts every time I breathe." She said in between sobs. "It's like he's everywhere even though he's not. Every time I close my eyes I see him. And it hurts so much." She took a deep breath. "And I don't know what to do. He's gone. He's never coming back. And I'm hurting you. That's the last thing that I ever wanted to do." Tears rolled down her face. "I never wanted you to become a victim of my inability to let him go."
He pulls her into his arms because he doesn't really know what else to do.
"I love him." She whispers. And the words don't even affect him. He already knows.
"I know." He says placing a kiss on the top of her head. "I know."
He holds her in his arms all night. And for a little while he pretends that everything's all right.
He pretends like the love of his life isn't in love with her dead boyfriend.
He pretends that his relationship is not falling apart all because of someone who doesn't even exist anymore.
For him it it'll always be her. But he knows that for her it will always be him.
Just something I wrote based on the song by Magnetic Field. I hope you guys like it! Tell me what you think!