DREAM JACK
A Xiaolin Showdown fanfic

I

I can't be. Here is what a well known evil boy genius thought. Jack Spicer, an almost bona fide villain (more an anti hero, actually), was joining an international evil genius assembly. Here were many of his former coworkers, as Vlad and Katnappe, along with new wannabe world conqueror, for example a megalomaniac green guy with a mentally retarded robot (even dumber than his Jack-bots), a blue old man with an hot lime woman, a baby with a strange English Accent and a teddy bear called 'Rupert' and a mute bald dwarf dressed in a cool grey outfit. It was a pretty messed up atmosphere, as all the villain were gloating over their latest almost victories.

Suddenly, Spicer's Detecto-bot beeped. A new Shen Gong Wu revealed itself: the Stone Scale. He knew what to do. He didn't have to care that the monks were stronger than him. He took his eli-bot, helloed all the other villain (one of them replied: "And is THIS the human technology? Nothing that I, the greatest Invader of the Irken Empire couldn't reproduce. Earth shall be mine! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!"), and flew away.

In the meanwhile, the four Xiaolin Monks were going after the Wu.
"Then, Dojo, what he did this Shen Gong Wu?", a yellow boy asked a dragon he was riding on.
"Well, I must tell you, Omi!", Dojo answered "I don't remember, you should read the scroll".
A Japanese cute girl took the scroll and attempted to read it. "There is nothing written here but the name!".
"Are you sure, Kimiko?", a Brazilian boy, who was the leader, asked "I am surprised. And few thing can truly surprise me!".
"I know!" Omi replied, then he said to his forth cowboy "What do you think, Clay?".
"That this is stranger than a three legged buffalo!" Clay answered.

Dojo was looking for the wu on a very tall mountain, the Everest. It was very cold, so cold that the monks were wearing winter clothes. Inside a dark grey cave, there was the Wu. It looked exactly like its name: it was a cubic box made out of stone. On the top, there was a picture of the Eye of Dashi.

Suddenly, a voice who they all learnt to despise was heard.

"Very well, Xiaolin losers. Go back to the temple and let me take this new Wu!". It was Jack Spicer, with his last remaining Shen Gong Wu, the Monkey Staff, and with all his little courage coming from above with his eli-bot.

"Jack Spicer! Prepare to receive a most humiliating defeat! Bring it over the top", Omi shouted, ready to attack his foe.

Despite the threatening position of the monks, Spicer said: "In the first place, cueball, it is 'bring it ON', second, very well, now you will fight my newest, strongest, and SMARTEST Jack-bots. C'mon, Ultra Jack-bots, ATTACK!"

… Nothing happens.

"I said… Ultra Jack-bots, ATTACK!"

…

"Ultra Jack-bots, C'mon!"

Suddenly the Jack bots appeared, but as soon as they saw the monks, they escaped screaming: "You made us too intelligent, master! We'd love to live! You can wrestle with the monks yourself, we will go in another planet, or your home to watch TV!"

Jack blushed and smacked his own face as Raimundo said to him: "The robots are right, Spicer, only fools like you would still fight against us after so many defeat. Surrender!"

Jack smirked, abeit he was actually hiding fear, then answered taking his Shen Gong Wu "I have just a thing to say! MONKEY STAFF!".

Doing so, he turned into his primal self and reached with his superhuman ability the Wu, but Raimundo showed up, took the Shen Gong Wu along with the evil boy genius. The artifact started glowing and the Brazilian boy yelled at his foe: "Jack Spicer, I challenge you to a Xiaolin Showdown. My Cannon Blast against your Monkey Staff."

"I'm fine with that!", Jack reluctancly said "The challenge is 'The Two Towers'. We must build a tower, and the one who builds the tallest tower in two minutes wins!"

Then the pale skinned boy and the Shroku warrior said together: "LET'S BEGIN! XIAOLIN SHOWDOWN!"

The cave became much bigger, and junks of metal crashed down between the two fighters and strong wind blew.

The two boys said: "Gong Yi Tapai!".

Then Jack used his determination to build the tower. Building thing out of metal was his favourite hobby, he has built so many robots, vehicles, even a Wu detector for all the time he was a Wu hunter. And finally, he would have use this skills against his enemies.

Instead, Raimundo had some trouble. The Xiaolin challenge was much harder for him, but he had almost complete mastery on the wind.

When he was building a tower taller than Jack, the evil boy genius successfully used his one of his pieces of junk to knock some parts the opponent's tower. Cheating was his forte. But the karma hit back, and the wind knocked over some piece of his own tower.

At the end a Dashi-like ghost (but he wasn't really Dashi, but just an arbitral) appeared and ordered the two to stop. Then he said: "The winner of 'The Two Tower' contest is… Jack Spicer".

The evil boy genius gloated in victory and take his new two Wu in his arms.

He then said: "What can this Wu do? (referring to the Stone Scale) I will use it right now. STONE SCALE!".

Shadows came out from the box and fast attacked the Wudai warriors.

Then Kimiko said pointlessly: "Jack! Jack!".

More 'Jack' she said, more her voice was turning into… his mother's?

Suddenly, he wakes up. His mother, who bears a striking resemblance to Wuya (just without her make-up, shorter hair and paler skin and overall more human), was calling him.

"Come one, Jackie, you must wake up!" she said.
"Mommy, I was doing such a great dream! I was defeating those Xiaolin losers!", he boy answered.
"What Xiaolin?", the woman asked her son. She looked puzzled.
"Mommy, did you forget? The reason why I usually go out!", Jack said getting up.
"Since when? You have not been out of your basement for a year!", his mother questioned.
"Since my father brought me this strange box from Hong Kong, remember?", Jack shouted.
"Yeah, Jack! I CLEARLY remember that your father has never been at Hong Kong, through he will go there tomorrow!".

Jack thought: "WTF happen?"

He went downstairs. He saw his robot. They were… different. Scrawnier. And with much more glitches! Their grammar was like Bizarro's. And they were even weaker, as a single punch of Jack could easily knock them out.

Jack thought: "No, it can't be! I am Jack Spicer, I can't remain with those robot. I must upgrade them". And he tried for all the day to do so but, like the day before he met Wuya, but, unlike that, he failed.

He said: "Anyway, I will conquer the world! Not Ice Land, not Fiji. THE WHOLE WORLD!". Then he laughed maniacally, only to get interrupted by his mother.

"Excuse me, dear, but your father sent to you this puzzle box. Just as you said me yesterday, I hope you finds what you wanted"

"Don't worry, mommy, I will!"

Jack turned gleeful. "Finally" he thought. He fast took the box and opened it. There was inside a freakish and ugly wooden mask. Wuya's mask, as he guessed. Now he just had to wait. Soon the mask would have taken life by its own, and he would have conquered the world. This time, he was ready… He would have defeated the Xiaolin Monks.

…

Yet again nothing happened. The mask was lifeless, and really ugly too. He sighed and took in his hands the mask . Nothing. It was just a useless, ugly mask. Very ugly. Did I say ugly?

The evil boy genius then dropped the mask and freaked out. He didn't realize before what was truly happening at first, but finally he understood.

The Xiaolin losers, the Heylin Masters, anything he saw for a supposedly long time, all his life before was... just a dream.

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R&R, please, I also need suggestions for future chapters. Plus, did you recognize the villains who made a cameo?
Also, I should continue, or end here the story? please, reviews and PMs!