A/N: All the River Song haters have been grating on me and I'm tired of writing and re-writing my response as to why she's not as "perfect" as they all claim she is. So, here's a new story for you all.

Two Companions In A TARDIS

"She's so annoying! She thinks she knows everything! She's so smug and so grating and she thinks she's so bloody perfect all the time!

Amy grunted. The throaty noise resonated throughout the TARDIS, cutting through The Doctor's rant like lasers through warm butter. When he finally craned his neck to give her his attention, she bent her red lips into a knowing smirk.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" he challenged, even more annoyed than before if that was possible.

"It sounds like you're talking about y'rself," she announced non-judgmentally.

"What!" He scoffed, practically throwing himself into the control panel in response to the statement. "That's ridiculous!"

"So River Song's a big headed know-it-all who likes make jibes at lesser species' expenses and show off with all the things she can do that the rest of us can't, yeah?"

"Precisely."

"Point. Proven."

"Not precisely! She's nothing like me! She's - she's - she's -"

"Everything like you?" Amy casually strolled over to the monitor and grabbed the bar, pulling it lazily around the central controls just as River had done, minus the red sex shoes dangling in front of course. "C'mon, Doctor! She's not perfect any'ow…and neither are you."

"Now you just wait one minute-"

"You just think she's perfect. You say she is out of irritation because she ruffles those big brilliant Time Lord peacock feathers of yours! But you've got to take into account that she's from your future, 'member that? Just think if myself from five years ago met myself today, I'd think I was pretty bloody brilliant myself! Same goes for any of us, you included. As time goes on, everything gets more advanced and River comes from that time. The you of the future is probably pretty advanced too."

The Doctor huffled beneath his breath. "I'm not saying you have a point or anything, but that does explain the red setting."

"Red setting?"

"Nothing," he muttered, staring at his shoes, half in thought and half just refusing to look at Amy.

"Anyway," she continued, undeterred, "you've just got to take that into consideration. You said you've met 'er before, yeah? Were any of those times ever where you were from her future?"

"…Yes."

"And? Was she as perfect then as she was today?"

"Yes."

"Liar."

"Okay, no…but she still was pretty smug and sure of herself!"

"Confident, you mean? A confident woman who matches you toe to toe and grates on your nerves and makes me want to be better than you've ever been before? No wonder you're attracted to her!"

"She does not!"

"Bollocks! You're so big headed y'rself you can't even see the forest for the trees." She shook her head of maraschino hair and gave The Doctor a sideways glance. "You're two peas in a pod, that's what you are." Amy released the bar and pointed her lavender lacquered fingernail at him. "Strike that! You're two Companions in a TARDIS! You're just as much her Companion and she is Yours. The truest of Companions that there ever was or will be."