Written for Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry (Challenges & Assignments):

April Monthly Challenge - HOUSE CHALLENGE - Going, Going, Gone!
Hufflepuff Prompt #20 - AU: Squib

2018 Yearly Event: The Insane House Challenge
Prompt #441 - Word: Ratatouille

Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter universe, or any of it's characters.

Author's Note: My Ron is this story is very naive, and unassuming. I figure he has been sheltered his whole life - living with his parents and not going to Hogwarts. In my mind I see him as having the type of personality where he knows what sex is, however even the thought of someone else seeing him naked is horrifying. He has never seen his parents do more than hug and kiss on the cheek - maybe a chaste peck on the lips, so that is what he expects all relationships to be like.

...

"Ron-ald! Ron-ald! Ron-ald!" The crowd is ecstatic, chanting his first name over and over as he flies around the pitch for a victory lap. He had saved every time the quaffle came at him, and he had done it most of the time while dodging multiple bludgers that were aimed his way! The game's commentator announces: "Ronald Weasley has officially been pronounced the world's greatest keeper!" There are woman throwing him their scarves and squealing as he flies by.

He finds his family in the VIP box that was given to him by the team for being so great, and he lands just in front of his parents. His mother is so excited she's crying, yelling to nobody specific, "That's my boy! That's my Ronald! Oh isn't he just the greatest!" His father stands tall next to her, a proud smile on his face and the sheen of respect in his eyes.

His older brothers are there, all looking up to him with love and respect. The twins even have an old jersey of his that they are holding out for his autograph. He signs his name with flourish, a goofy smile on his face as George (or is it Fred?) hugs him and says, "You're the greatest, little bro! What an amazing game! Well done!" He steps back with a grin, and Ron sees the love of his life standing behind where his brother once stood.

Hermione Granger, his girlfriend, is bouncing on her toes waiting for him to see her. The moment his brother steps aside, she runs to him and jumps into his arms. He catches her effortlessly, giving her a huge hug and a kiss on her cheek. She pulls back with a look of utter devotion and a smile on her face. "Oh Ronald! The way you play is so brilliant! I love watching you play, I want to come to every game from now on! You'll let me, won't you?" She slides her body down his as he loosens his grip around her waist, her eyes bright and shining.

"Oh course, love," he says, then gestures to his broom. "Want to take a lap around the pitch with me?" She lets out a girlish squeal of delight and nods her head enthusiastically. He mounts the broom and then holds out his hand for her to mount in front of him. The chanting only grows louder as the crowd sees him with her in front of him — though the women that had thrown their scarves towards him seem to stomp their feet and pout.

Suddenly, a bludger comes out of nowhere and hits him on the head.

He hears a scream and bolts up from the floor. There is an empty mug next to him. "Do calm yourself, boy. I called your name multiple times before I had to resort to throwing something at you." His boss, Severus Snape, smirks down at him. Ron looks around groggily; he must have fallen off the chair he was sitting in at some point.

Ron rubs his head absently as he listens to Snape with half an ear, grateful that at least this time there wasn't anything hot in the mug. "So hurry now: those ingredients cannot be put through the floo, so I need you to run over to Slug & Jiggers and get them," Snape says before he turns to walk back into his laboratory. He goes a few steps before stopping to pull a handful of coins from his pocket. He picks a coin out of the lot and tosses it toward Ron. "Get me some lunch on your way back — whatever the special is at the Leaky. It's getting close to lunchtime."

Ron nods his head, and looks at the floor forlornly. His stomach growls. Snape turns to him upon hearing the stomach noise. "Oh, you didn't forget your lunch again did you?" he asks, exasperated. Ron looks up briefly, nods in the affirmative, and then looks towards the floor again. Another coin hits him on the head. "Go ahead and get yourself something to eat too, then. I won't have your father accusing me of deliberately starving his precious squib son. Hurry now, we are going to have a busy night; there are several orders that will need to be hand delivered."

He's been working for Severus Snape these past three years since he turned 17 and his parents said that he needed to contribute something to the household. His father has been friends with Snape for years, and asked if he would hire Ron as an errand boy when it became clear that he couldn't survive alone in the Muggle world.

That had been a disaster - first Ron couldn't find a job because he didn't have any formal Muggle education. Then he had attempted to ride the tube and gotten so lost he had to beg for help to get home. Then, once he finally found someone willing to help him get home, the boy got him into London and then robbed him. It was decided then that the Muggle world was just too dangerous for Molly Weasley's son, and he would continue to live with his parents until he found a proper wife to take care of him. A proper wife…

Ron contemplates how he met the love of his life as he runs towards Slug & Jiggers. His sister, Ginny, had been about to enter her 6th year at Hogwarts, and his parents had brought him along to shop for her school list. Ginny had invited her boyfriend Harry to meet them in Diagon Alley, and he, in turn, had brought his muggleborn best friend, Hermione Granger. She was the most beautiful women he had ever seen, her hair wild and untamed, her eyes shining with intelligence. He knew the moment he met her that she was the one true love of his life. Sadly, it seemed as if he couldn't even walk when she was around, and he promptly tripped and fell face first into the picture window of the bookstore they were standing outside of. Then, when she had asked if he was alright, he hadn't been able to form a coherent word, and just kept stuttering out, "Ahhhh, ummm, ohhh, errr…" She wasn't very impressed with him at that point in time, and it hadn't gotten any better these last four years.

In fact, it only got worse. About a year after he had started working for Snape, Ginny had stopped by and brought him the lunch mum had packed and he had forgotten. She brought Hermione with her, as they were going to do some shopping in Diagon Alley. Hermione had taken one look at Snape, and began to blush and giggle. He still couldn't get more than two coherent words out of his mouth while in her presence, so he hadn't been able to ask her what was wrong. Snape hadn't seemed to impressed with either of them, until Hermione seemed to get a hold of herself and started to ask all sorts of potions related questions. Snape had asked her and Ginny to join him back in his laboratory, so they could continue to debate whatever they were talking about while he finished the potion he was making. A week later they began officially courting. Last year they announced their engagement, with the wedding planned for next month. It wasn't fair, he had met her first! She was supposed to fall in love with him, so they could get married and she could be the "proper wife" his mum was always saying he needed!

He pouts as he thinks this to himself, giving Snape's name to the girl behind the counter at Slug & Jiggers. He accepts the order and runs quickly to the Leaky Cauldron to get the food, which is luckily ready for him when he gets there. Tom, the barkeep, tells him that he was expecting him, as Snape had floo-called and asked for the food to be ready when Ronald got there.

Errands done, Ron thought back to the time he was growing up and how he had felt when he found out he had no magic as he carefully walked back to Snape's little store; he was now carrying the box from the apothecary, with the two smaller boxes of food sitting on top of that.

He had known early on that he was different from his brothers. At age eight, he'd had a nightmare and made his way toward the kitchen for a glass of milk and a snuggle with his mum. As he had made his way down the stairs, he heard raised voices.

It was his brother Charlie speaking loudly to their parents: "You have to have noticed it! He doesn't even show the slightest signs of magic! It's not fair to him to keep him in this world; he won't ever be able to be fully integrated. Mum, I love him and I don't want him to think he's less than us just because he's a squib. Please at least think about my offer."

His mum was crying, and his father spoke up with a very cold tone. "Just because there are not outward signs doesn't mean he's a squib. Percy didn't show signs of magic until he got his Hogwarts letter; perhaps Ronald is just a slow bloomer like that. Now, you are upsetting your mother, I think you should leave." Charlie had left that night and moved to Romania. He comes home every few years, but never stays for more than a couple hours - at most, he will maybe stay overnight if it is a very special occasion. He always looks at Ron sadly when he visits - almost as if he wants to say something to him but doesn't know how to say it.

He had asked his mum what a squib was the next day. She had started crying again, and then explained to him: "A squib is someone who is born into a magical family, but possesses no magic of their own."

Ron had then asked, "Am I a squib mummy? I don't do magic like everyone else." She had completely broken down at that, and he didn't get an answer until the day he should have gotten his Hogwarts letter.

The owls dropped letters in front of Percy, George, and Fred - but there was no letter for Ron. Everyone had looked at him sadly and his mother started to weep quietly. His father stood up and announced, "This changes nothing. We all love you Ronald, and just because you don't have enough magic to attend Hogwarts doesn't mean you cannot live a full and productive life."

He had gone on to speak of Muggles, and their wondrous inventions. Ron had tuned his father out and begun thinking about how terrible his life was. His brothers would continue to use magic to harass him, and there was nothing he would be able to do about it. He had been eagerly awaiting the day he would get his own wand, and now that day would never come! It had taken years after that event for his self-loathing to calm down enough that he didn't contemplate the easiest way to end his life.

Ron now figures that life is just depressing when you are a squib. His boss is indifferent at best towards him, the girl he loves is engaged to marry said boss, and he has no magic to make his everyday tasks easier. Plus he had loved it when Charlie would take him up on his broom when they were younger, and had always thought one day he would own a broom of his own and fly everywhere on it. He sighs; no use dreaming of flying or playing Quidditch when you're a squib. Though he does enjoy those dreams.

When Ron steps into the shop, he sees a young lady with long, wavy blonde hair cascading down her back. Her robes look tidy, though they definitely are not new with the bottom hem starting to fray just a bit. He looks down at the hem of his own robes and notices they are even more frayed, and he hears his mother's voice in his head, telling him that he 'really shouldn't even notice things like that on other people.' When he closes the door, the bell above it jingles a subtle tune and the lady turns toward him. She has a gentle, round face with the most brilliant eyes - they almost look purple to him.

Ron doesn't know why he notices everyone's eyes; it's just something he's always done and doesn't know how to stop it. This lady's eyes have a sadness to them, though when she smiles they seem to sparkle. "Hello...err, can I help you miss?" he asks softly as he moves behind the counter. He opens a small door close to the floor and places both the apothecary box and the box of food he brought for Snape into the dumb waiter before closing the door and tapping the buzzer so Snape will know to summon the items to himself.

When he looks back toward the lady, she is staring at him - at his shoulders and arms specifically. He coughs to get her attention and raises an eyebrow like he's seen Snape do to people who stare at him. The lady blushes, and smiles at him again. "Hello. My name is Lavender. I'm just waiting for Hermione, she went to talk to Mr. Snape about something before we go dress shopping. I'm to be her Maid of Honor." She smiles again, and her gaze shifts back toward his arms. "It's so exciting, I'm to be in a wedding! I've never been before, my cousin got married but didn't want me in the wedding party because she says I'm fat...but Hermione doesn't care about that. She says that I'm her best friend, and it doesn't matter if I'm skinny or fat, or even if my skin turns purple the day of the wedding - I am going to be standing up as her Maid of Honor or she won't get married. Oh, isn't that sweet of her? I'm just so excited!"

Ron is getting self conscious, this lady keeps staring at his arms, then her eyes will sweep down his body before rushing back up to his arms again. And she's talking really fast, he's not sure what point she's trying to make. He looks at her, his eyes sweeping over her figure. He then looks her straight in the eyes and blurts, "You're not fat. Why would anyone tell you that lie?" His winces as he hears his voice, he sounds angry. In a softer tone he adds, "I'm sorry, Lavender. My name is Ronald, by the way." As her eyes slip down to his shoulders and arms again, he starts to blush. "Why do you keep looking at my arms?"

"I'm not!" she says defensively. Then her entire face turns red and she looks down to her hands. "Well ok, maybe I do. It's just that you look so strong. I've never met a man who looked like he could carry me around before. I bet you could, though." The last words are whispered so softly he finds himself leaning toward her in order to hear.

"I don't think you understand," he says, his voice now regretful. "I'm a squib, so yes, I'm strong, but I can't do any of the magical things you would consider normal. I will never be able to do anything worthwhile, except maybe carry you around. You really aren't fat, you know." He mumbles the last words, wistfully bringing the image of carrying this woman over the threshold of a house after a wedding ceremony. He shakes his head as his thoughts come to a screeching halt. 'Wait, what? I love Hermione, how could I consider marrying anyone else?'

She giggles, bringing her hand up to cover her mouth. "Oh I think that's just fine. I'm muggleborn, like Hermione, so I do most things the muggle way still." Her voice gains a hardened tone, she seems to stand straighter, and her body almost seems to be in a defensive position. "For your information, I know that I am considered fat by today's societies' standards. You don't have to pretend otherwise!" She seems to deflate after that, and she continues meekly with, "And my magic isn't very strong, you see, so I don't use it as often as some other people do…" her voice trails off and she bites her lip.

Ron stands up straighter. "I already told you: you're not fat! At least I don't see how you could be! Stop talking about yourself like that, you look beautiful." Suddenly he hears a crash in the back where Snape has his laboratory set up. "Wait here, I need to go see what that was." He says as he runs for the door.

The room beyond is a mess: the shelf above the sink that Snape uses to store cauldrons is broken and cauldrons are rolling across the floor. He looks around, starting to worry that Snape and Hermione didn't come running at the sound of the crash. Nobody is in the room, and nothing but cauldrons are on the floor. He turns to walk back to the storefront and close up the shop so that he can start picking up the cauldrons and repair the shelf. Lavender is standing at the counter where he left her, concern written on her face.

"It was just a shelf, seems to have collapsed under the weight of all the cauldrons. I need to close up the shop and go fix things back there. Uh, I don't know where Snape and Hermione went to; they aren't in the back room…" his voice trails off again at the huge smile on Lavender's face.

"Oh, may I help you? I'd so love to watch you work." Her voice sounds odd, as if she's out of breath. She seems to be breathing rather fast also. He crosses the room to her and reaches for her hand.

"Sure, come on and have a seat back here then," he says, leading her to one of the workbenches. As she sits, he runs out to the front and locks the shop up quickly before dashing back to where he left Lavender. "Are you ok, Lavender? You seem to be breathing pretty fast. Do you want a glass of water maybe?"

"Oh, um, yes - water would be nice," she says in that breathless voice. He grabs a clean glass and fills it with water at the sink. When he hands it to her, their fingers brush and he feels an odd tingling where they touched.

He smiles and turns to begin repairing the shelf - turns out the actual shelf didn't break, just the bolt holding it to the wall. He shakes his head and removes the rest of the shelf from the wall to place it next to the sink. "I'll have to go to the store in muggle London tomorrow. The bolt is broken." He turns to look at her as he's speaking.

"Oh, that sounds exciting! Do you know your way around? I could go with you and help you navigate if you'd like?" she asks, her voice still having that raspy breathless quality, only slightly less breathless and more raspy now. A small smirk forms on her lips as she says, "I grew up in London. I know most of the streets - and the tube." Ron nods, thinking that it would be nice to have company - even if the store is just a few doors down from the Leaky's London entrance.

She stands up and claps her hands. "Oh wonderful!" She moves to stand in front of him, and reaches for his hand. "I hope you don't think me too forward, but I feel very comfortable with you. I think I would really enjoy getting to know more about you. Would you like to come to my house for dinner one night after you get off of work?"

A loud gasp is heard from the side doorway and Hermione and Snape walk into the room. Snape looks at the cauldrons on the floor in horror, then he looks to the wall and sees the shelf sitting on the sink. "I take it you'll be needing to go into London tomorrow then. Very well, go on home and get some sleep. Come in early and I'll have some muggle money for you to buy what you need to repair the shelf." He sighs, then pulls out his wand and casts a spell on the cauldrons to stack them neatly next to the sink. Ron watches enviously, then looks to Lavender to see her staring at his arms and shoulders again. She notices him and looks up to his face.

"So, dinner sometime then, Ronald?" she asks, tilting her head to the side slightly. Ron can't help himself from thinking that it just makes her even more cute.

"Um...dinner….yes, that, uh, that sounds lovely? Lavender. May I escort you outside on my way out?" He holds his arm out for her to take. She takes his arm and they walk towards the store front exit. Ron unlocks the door and holds it open for her. She giggles as she passes past him, then stands waiting for his arm again.

When he offers it, she takes his arm and leans toward him to whisper, "How about dinner tonight? I have a new recipe for ratatouille I've been wanting to try, but don't have many chances to feed other people. Would you mind being a taste tester for me?"

~Epilogue, 1 year later~

Ron's life is looking up now. He has a girlfriend - a real, live girlfriend - who loves him and, even better, loves to cook for him. He has a job he still hates, but with Lavender's help he is slowly gaining Snape's respect. At least if he falls asleep while waiting for something to do these days, he isn't woken up by having an object tossed at his head anymore.

Progress is progress, eh?

...

Word Count: 3705 by Google Docs