"What the fuck Harry?" I scream walking into the flats bathroom.
In hindsight, that's probably not the best response to finding your boyfriend coved in blood from self inflicted cuts. In my defense this is the 3rd time I've found him like this after multiple promises that he would stop.
"Draco I'm sorry I-" He starts, before I completely lose it.
"NO! Harry I don't want to hear your apologies! I don't care! Why are you doing this again? You're like… its like; you are a drowning victim and every fucking time I pull you out, and assure you are safe, you jump back in and start screaming for help again!" I scream
He's sobbing uncontrollable now and with a sigh I slide down next to him. "Harry are you even listing to what I'm saying?"
"You don't care about me anymore!" He sobs
"Ahh! That's not what I said." I growl ready to pull my hair out. I take his chin roughly forcing him to look at me. "Harry, you got to listen to me, okay? I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone, but Harry you can't keep doing this. This." I gesture to his arms. "This hurts me Harry. What if you cut to deep, what if I didn't get there in time Harry, you would be dead! I never want to lose you, but if you keep doing this. I let his face go and swipe at my own tears. Why am I going to stay Harry? I don't want to watch you kill yourself, I can't."
Eventually he falls into my chest and I wrap my arms around him, he's shaking almost violently and I let him cry for awhile, simply giving him a place to cry. When he's finally quite I push him back, I banish the blood and heal one cut that hasn't scabbed over yet. "Harry I want you to get help, I want you to go to a muggle hospital, because apparently St Mungo's isn't doing anything for you." He nods once still shaking. "Come on we're going to talk to Hermione, you're going now.
He didn't talk for the whole 5 hour process of getting him admitted, Hermione and I sat with him the whole time answering questions for various doctors. When they came to take him to the ward he ran to me clinging. "I'm sorry Draco I'm sorry please don't make me go please don't leave me!"
"Harry no you need help and I can't help you." I say kissing his hair.
He pulls away from me, glaring despite the tears still falling.
"I love you baby" I say kissing his tear stained lips "I'll miss you"
"Miss you." He mumbles as he is lead away.
The next 90 days are hell, for me I visit once a day, but sleeping alone every night after nearly a year of having him beside me is killing me. Hermione and Ginny come and keep me company often, and I the simple acquaintances I had with them turn into real friendship. As I watch harry improve from week to week I can't regret making him go. They diagnosed him with Borderline personality disorder, and set him up on meds that seem to really work. On discharge he hadn't cut for 60 days, but had picked up a nicotine addiction, something that makes me laugh for all the years of him scolding me for my own. It takes awhile to get back into routine at home, he's different then the scared broken hero, I fell in love with almost two years ago, but over time I come to love this Harry even more. I don't have to worry that if I say the wrong thing he'll try and kill himself. I don't have to ask him a million times for him to tell me what's bothering him. I no longer feel like we're barley hanging on in our relationship that perhaps it can last forever.