A/N: I have had this idea floating in my head for awhile now, and I know why it couldn't become canon in the show, but I think it's time I post it here. Recently I have lost my brother, and while dealing with this loss, I have written this piece I felt could've been a continuation of Season Three Episode Five Haunted. I understand this idea is angsty and sad, however I have been in that kind of mood and writing has always been my outlet for dealing with my grief.
*This idea is mine, but all characters/locations/languages belong to the creators of the show and the creators of the comic books which brought us these awesome characters. This story was partially inspired by Taylor Swift's song Haunted.
"No." The redheaded space alien whispered as she slid down the wall in the dark hallway opposite of the heavy metal door. Her hand covered her mouth in shock.
"I'm sorry, Star." Raven's own whispered voice carried a similar twinge of pain and heartbreak to it.
"No. There must be a-a mistake." Starfire's head snapped up, causing green eyes to bore into violet ones, pleading for new information. "There has to be..."
"I tried, I did. But there was nothing I could do." Starfire trembled, her legs curling close to her body. "His body could not handle the emotional turmoil."
"I do...I do not understand." Raven's head bowed, her cape falling forward to cover her face.
"I know, Starfire. I know. I'm so sorry."
"He...he can-cannot be gone. This is...this is a joke. You are doing the joking and the kidding." Raven shook her head, releasing a long pained sigh.
"This isn't a joke, Star. He's gone. Robin isn't coming back." The alien princess's eyes closed.
"I do not believe..." She trailed off, her bottom lip quivering as her eyes began to fill with unshed tears. "He was always so strong. He...he cannot be..." She swallowed. "I-I need to see him." Her abrupt statement caused Raven to look up.
"Starfire-"
"No! I-I need to see him. Maybe he is only doing the sleeping. Maybe I can-I can do the waking of him up." Starfire scrambled to her feet, a newfound hope in her eyes.
"He's not sleeping, Starfire. Cyborg and I did everything we could. There is no way of bringing him back." Raven took a step closer, though the look on the Tamaranian's face told Raven the princess was no longer listening. "He's dead. You can't bring people back from the dead."
"This is...you are doing the joking. This is all an Earthen joke. I will walk to him and he will be doing the laughing and the kidding and be the okay."
"Robin is dead, Starfire. Dead. Killed. Gone." Starfire's lip quivered though her hands began to shake.
The Tamaranian's hands began to cackle and fizzle with energy. She quickly balled them into fists though their glowing green color meant her emotions were beyond her control. Tears streamed down her cheeks, creating wet trails down to her chin. Her green eyes were manic-wild and wide and crazed.
"I will do the seeing of him. And if you try to do the stopping you will get hurt." Her voice wavered, thick with emotion. "I will see him. And I will see him now." Her tone signaled she was not to be messed with right at this moment.
"Okay." Raven nodded her head slightly. "Alright. You can see him. But you have to promise you will not destroy anything. And Robin is no longer alive."
"I do not care." The space alien hissed, eagerly stomping behind her purple-clad teammate.
Raven's hands began to shake, however she kept them locked into fists by her sides. Everyone knew Starfire would take Robin's death the hardest, yet none of them knew how hard it would be to watch the Tamaranian literally crumble because of it. It was taking all of Raven's energy and control to remain calm and emotionless. For all their sakes.
Raven slowly raised one of her balled fists. She slowly unclenched her fingers. Carefully yet quickly, she typed in the code for the MedBay room housing their fallen teammate. Their dead leader. Once the code was entered, Raven curled her fingers back into the fisted position then opened the door.
The MedBay was dark and dreary, not a place for their usually composed leader. Raven walked by a vacated bed, then another, only to stop in front of one with the plastic shades closed. She swallowed before removing the shades.
Robin laid there, lifeless. His once open eyes were now closed and his mask had been removed in order for the oxygen tube he needed to use to stay in place. His uniform had several holes from where the wires were, the wires which helped keep him alive. His face lacked color, and his chest no longer moved up and down-indicating he was no longer breathing.
Starfire gasped behind Raven once her eyes fell onto her best friend.
"No." The alien princess whispered. Raven closed her eyes and barely managed to hold in a wince.
"I'm so sorry, Starfire." She turned, her cape brushed the Tamaranian's side. Starfire was too in shock to feel or notice it. "I'll give you some time alone."
Starfire closed her eyes, then licked her lips as she attempted to control her emotions. Her hands returned to their normal color in time for her to automatically bring them up to cover her nose and mouth. Her tears fell faster and faster the longer she stood there, glued to his bedside without speaking. Finally, she lowered her hands, and opened her eyes. She robotically sat down in the chair, scooting it closer to the bed. She sat there in silence for another few minutes, before the sight of him had her breaking out into painful sobs.
Starfire sobbed and sobbed. Pain and agony tore through her like nothing else could. She sat there, sobbing at his bedside until she couldn't breathe (not that she needed to but being with Robin, breathing meant being able to share something in common with him) and she continued to sob some more. At some point during her crying, her head fell onto his uniform clad chest and her hands gripped the material of his uniform on his stomach.
After sobbing a little while more, Starfire stopped crying and began to sniffle. Then her sniffles became pained whimpers. And then she was just numb. She sat there with her head on his chest, and his uniform clutched in her hands. Each inhale she took she breathed in his scent, committing it to memory. The feel of his uniform in her hands. The way he rested under her head. Finally, she mustered up the courage to speak.
"Robin." Tears once again filled her eyes. She let them fall, there was no use to hold them back. "Robin, you were so strong. You were so nice. On Tamaran, there was no such word as nice. But when I came to Earth, you taught me that word. You did the showing of me what it meant. I will continue doing the trying to be nice for you." She paused her little speech, allowing a few sobs to escape before she continued. "You were my very best friend. I never had one on my planet. And I know I never will have a best friend again because my best friend is you. I cannot do the thinking of tomorrow, or tonight. A future without you is a future without nice. And a future without nice should not do the existing. But I know if you were not 'dead' as Raven put it, you would be doing the saying of 'a Titan's job is to save Jump City' therefore to honor you, I will remain on Earth and remain in Jump City. You were my k'norfka. You never showed rutha. I would pay all the grubfars to have you back. But that is not the way of the living, no." She licked her lips. "Wherever you are, I will find you. I will travel all the plithorgs in the galaxy until I find where you are." She began sobbing again. "Robin, I cannot do the staying of here any longer. I will not be able to do the leaving. I am sorry I cannot. Please do not do the hating of me for leaving. I do not like the goodbyes either. I do the wishing I would never do the saying goodbye to you. But now I must." She raised her head from his chest and let go of his uniform. She smoothed the material before standing up. "Pleasant shlorvax, Robin. I will never do the forgetting of you."
As Starfire turned herself away from the bed, she could faintly imagine the whispered words in Robin's voice helping her walk away, "I will always protect you, Star."