Disclaimer: J.R.R. Tolkien owns Middle-Earth and all its characters. I don't earn money with this story.
A/N: This story is a translation (with a couple of changes) of the 'sî ar ennas - von Lalaith zu Níniel' Oneshot I've got online at my account on the german version of this website. My authors name there is 'firian', if you want to check it out.
Please review and correct me kindly if I made any grammar or spelling mistakes! It's my first English fanfiction, I normally write in German. I tried my best to make it as touching as the German version :D
So let's get started, I hope you enjoy this Oneshot :) Cookies for everyone ;)
Here's the short version of Doriaths history (for those who haven't read the Silmarillion):
- It's located in the centre of Beleriand (Beleriand is a peninsula in the north of Middle-Earth which got flooded round the year 538 of the 1st age)
- King Thingol (elf) and Melian (Maiar='lower goddess') were its rulers
- Melian had put a spell round their realm, so nothing bad could enter the kingdom
- The capital of this realm was Menegroth, the Thousand Caves (an underground palace)
- The kingdom fell in the year 503 of the 1st age when King Thingol was murdered by a bunch of Dwarfs from Ered Luin (mountain range). Their reason for this crime was that King Thingol was owner of one of the three Silmaril (similar affects like the One Ring, apart from the fact that it burns every evil person who touches them)
- After the Kings' death Melian sailed into the west and the spell faded
- A war between the elves of Doriath and the Dwarfs of Ered Luin began
- After defeating the Dwarfs Dior (grandchild of King Thingol and Melian) got crowned
- After Dior got killed by Feanors sons (they also wanted to have the Silmaril) the remaining elves fled together with Dior's daughter Elwing who took the Silmaril with her to the Grey Havens
From Lalaith to Níniel
Doriath, year 503 of the 1st age
In the far-reaching forests which expanded around the huge rock formation above the halls of Menegroth you could watch two young elves playing together. They seemed to be barely 40 years old what was quite young for an elf. With 50 years they got counted as Teenagers and they weren't seen as adults until they reached their 100th summer. The children romped laughing through the grass. A boy with long blonde hair and blue eyes and a girl with pitch-black hair reaching her waist and dark green curious eyes. The boy's hairstyle looked like a warriors with its small braids above each pointy ear to ban any hairstrands out of the face. The girl had two stands of her hair tied together at the back of her head.
"Lalaith! Dinners ready!", the voice of a dark haired elf echoed through the forest. "I'm coming ada (Daddy)", the young girl answered shouting. She smiled at the boy she had played with and ran to her Dad. The elf hugged his daughter quick before they returned home. Through a labyrinth of corridors in the underground palace they reached their apartment. "Nana (Mommy)", Lalaith said happy and hugged her mother tightly. The young girl really adored her parents. She always managed to make them smile. Her name Lalaith (laughing girl) just fitted her perfectly because she had such a beautiful laugh which directly made everyone happy.
Next morning the young girl woke up because of a bloodcurdling scream. Lalaiths eyes were scanning her room afraid. She ran into her parents' bedroom. "Ada (Daddy), Nana (Mommy) what was that scream?", she asked her parents frightened. "I don't know, dear", explained her mother, "But ada (Daddy) and me are going to check what's going on. Promise me you stay here hidden!" Lalaith nodded. Her parents changed quickly, grabbed their weapons, kissed her goodbye and locked the front door.
Lalaith changed too. Sitting on her bed she listened, trying to figure out what was going on outside: Another painful scream which got smothered abruptly. The clash of weapons. It was an attack! The fear of the young girl grew with every scream she heard. Her eyes kept scanning the dark room panicked. Her parents had extinguished all the torches and candles inside their apartment. The fighting outside in the corridors seemed to approach.
She heard sounds like … like somebody's trying to break the door. Lalaith sat shivering on her bed and just wished her parents were there. With a loud crash the front door got ripped out of the hinges. She heard sluggish heavy steps coming nearer. She stood still flatly pressed against the wall on top of her bed. Silent tears were escaping her eyes. Suddenly a massive dwarf broke in with his axe held up high. He had a tousled beard and she could see hate and lust to kill in his dark eyes. Lalaith swallowed while the dwarf approached in the darkness of her room. "Dwarfs don't see well in darkness", a thought crossed her mind. She shot a quick look to the door. Then she ran out as fast as she could, nearly caught by the dwarfs axe.
Outside her family's apartment she sent a quick thank you prayer to Ilúvatar and sprinted to the throne room of King Thingol, hoping to find somebody she knew. Lalaith froze as she reached it. The room was plastered with corpses of dead elves and dwarfs killed by axes or swords. Long arrows were sticking in some dwarfs bodies. Tears running down Lalaiths beautiful face. She tried her best not to throw up because of the fresh blood pools around the wounds of the dead.
A couple moments later she realized the fighting was still going on at the other end of the throne room. Lalaiths heart stopped as she spotted her father in the battle. She wanted to run to him but her feet felt like they were glued on the floor. He fought against one dwarf while another approached his back. "Ada (Daddy), behind you!", Lalaith screamed to warn him but the elf just stared at his daughter in shock because of her being at a battlefield. Lalaiths eyes widened in horror as she watched the second dwarf using the inattentiveness of her father hacking his axe in her father's back. "Ada (Daddy)", she whispered in a choked voice. She wanted to scream but her voice broke.
She ran over to her father and kneeled ignoring the battle next to him "Escape, elen nîn (my star) Take … take my horse and ride into the east – passing Ered Luin and the Misty Mountains … there's a huge forest with a couple of elves … Don't approach the North, there's Angmar and Gunda-", the elf managed to say under agony. The life flooded out of him like the blood out of his wound until he faded. Her face streamed with tears Lalaith watched her father's empty eyes. Finally she brought herself to stand up but not without kissing her father's forehead and whispering a short elvish blessing.
Stumbling she reached the stables and climbed on Dúaths back. She told the black stallion sobbing where he should take her before another wave of tears shook her.
A couple of days she rode through eastern Beleriand and no day passed without shedding lakes of tears. Where the rivers Gelion and Legolin joined each other they took their first brake since they left. They quenched their thirst and the young elf allowed her horse to graze while she went searching berries and mushrooms. When their strength finally came back they continued their journey to the east. But they headed a bit southern too, so they could avoid meeting creatures of Angmar. In the capital of this dark realm lived Sauron a Maiar who joined Morgoth (evil god) and got his mightiest servant.
After more than 700 miles riding through the wasteland of Eriador they finally reached and crossed the Misty Mountains. Dúath and the young elf had quenched their thirst at springs and had eaten what they had found. The long ride affected both of them: they were unnaturally thin. When the silhouette of a huge forest appeared at the horizon Lalaith felt a touch of hope. "Take us to somebody who will pick us up", she whispered to her horse.
They rode through the forest. It hat huge trees with dark trunks and strong green leaves, the sunlight pouring through the branches dipping the ground in a warm golden light. The young elf already loved this forest although it reminded her painful of her home Doriath.
Dúath stopped in front of a tiny, crooked house and Lalaith jumped with a whispered 'Thank you for everything, mellon nîn (my friend)' off this back and. She watched the hose questioning, he just whinnied encouraging. Lalaith took a deep breath and knocked at the door. From inside she heard someone muttering and steps approaching the door. An old human came out, fully dressed in brown. He wore an aged gown and a hat with a feather. His hair and long beard were brown with many thin grey strands in. He had a kind expression in his face while he stood leaning on a wooden stick. The man's eyes studied her confused.
"Who are you?", he asked but didn't seemed to be concentrated. "… I'm … La-…Níniel", the young girl said hesitating, "and what's your name?" "Níniel – a interesting name … why are you called Tear-Maiden?", he mumbled more to himself than to her, "I'm Radagast the Brown" Deep sadness appeared in the girls eyes. "It's about my past. I don't like talking about it … But tell me are you an Istari (wizard)?", she said and Radagast nodded. "Yes, I'm an Istari - I'm wondering why you know me. You're an elf, right? But you seem quite young … you look hungry, come inside. I've got some Mushroom soup ready!", the Istari muttered. Níniel forced herself to smile and followed the wizard inside. She was stunning about the bags of phials and small bottles randomly spread out on the wooden shelves.
Over the years living in Rhosgobel, Radagasts home, the wizard got kind of her adoptive father. From time to time she told him under many tears parts of her past. Whenever she ended up crying he would hold her in his arm, rubbing her bag and muttering kind words. Níniel kept on helping Radagast where she could. They healed animals and let them free again together. Dúath lived free in the forest which was as Radagast told her named Eryn Lasgalen round the tiny house but when she called him he would come. Often she was riding through the forest searching for injured animals to heal and just enjoying the freedom.
One day someone watched her from the distance but she didn't realize it. When she came home that day Radagast sat thoughtfully in an old chair. He didn't even recognize that she entered. "What are you thinking about?", she asked him sensitive. "Gandalf visited my while you've been away", the wizard began, "he told me in the north of the mountain range in this forest there's a elvish fortress. He told me you should go there, you've been away you're your kin far to long" "I'm afraid that my memories come back", Níniel mumbled silently.
"Although I don't like the thought of you leaving me … but I want Níniel to get Lalaith again", he explained with sadness in his voice, "Furthermore I know you have a strong heart, not many people would have survived the things you've been through" She hugged her adoptive father tightly. "Tomorrow at sunrise I'll leave and check it out", Níniel finally said. Radagast smiled at the now 130 year old elf. He really hoped she would find her happiness again. She'd been in Rhosgobel for such a long time. Since three years they were even in a new age as Gandalf told him.
The next morning Níniel left together with Dúath. She was wearing the traditional clothing of Doriath as always. It was the same outfit she'd worn during her escape. Tanks to Ilúvatar the green-brown clothes had grown with her. As she reached the palace a lonely tear escaped her eyes when she realized it looked like a smaller version of Menegroth. Quickly she gave Dúath a touch of the spurs before the upcoming memories could overwhelm her. She rode to the back of the palace on which a small village was located. When Níniel approached the gate she recognized that there were two guards standing. She jumped off Dúath and walked over to the two elves, her horse trotting behind her.
"What do you want?", one of them wanted to know. But before Níniel could answer the man continued: "What kind of clothes are you wearing? I haven't seen this kind for about 90 years!" Níniel took a deep breath. "I'm from Doriath. During the war between elves and dwarfs my father got killed. He told me to search for the elves in this forest. Please tell me what happened exactly this night?", I gave him the short version of my story. "Truly your clothing is from Doriath", the guard began, "The Dwarfs murdered King Thingol because they wanted to have the Silmaril. 35 years after the fall of Doriath whole Beleriand got flooded. The remained elves joined Círdan (lord of the Grey Havens) or came here" Affected by the truth she started crying. The second guard left suddenly in the palace direction. "Excuse me milord but what's your name?", Níniel asked hesitating in a chocked voice. "I'm called Mablung. I cut the Silmaril out of Carcharoths (wolf that killed Beren) stomach. What's your name?", Mablung answered. "I'm Níniel – I was 40 summers old when I left Doriath", she whispered.
The second guard came back. "The King's awaiting you milady. Please follow me.", the elf told me. I looked back to Mablung who took care of my horse. Then I followed the second guard inside the caves. Walking through the palace which seemed familiar was worse for Níniel than every torture. Again she was crying. As they stopped in front of the king she didn't even look up.
"Look at me", a well known male voice ordered. Níniel hat to blink a couple times before her vision cleared. "Oropher?!", she asked not believing that she stood in front the father of her best friend. "Lalaith?!", he asked surprised. "I'm not Lalaith anymore. I haven't even laughed once since that night. My name is Níniel now.", she told calm but with a lot of bitterness in her voice. Again she watched the floor.
Níniel heard someone approaching and looked up. When she recognized this elf, tears flooded her cheeks but this time because of joy. Before Níniel could say anything she found herself in a very tight hug. "Lalaith – I can't believe you're alive", the elf mumbled in her hair. "Thranduil", she whispered, her voice filled with emotions. Níniel couldn't believe that it was really him. The elf with whom she had played every free second, the elf with these incredible ice blue eyes. His hair had gotten a bit more silver but apart from that fact he was still 'her' Thranduil. After over 90 years of pain she felt complete again!
Níniel couldn't prevent a laugh. She was laughing again after all this years and this time she really felt it. It was a true one! "You're laugh is even more beautiful than in my memories", Thranduil whispered in her ear what made her blush. As they parted she looked at him with a bit of disappointment because she had wanted this hug to never end. This made him laugh. "Edlothiad, show Lalaith her room, let her take a bath and give her some new clothes. She will have dinner with us", King Oropher told a young elvish maiden. Edlothiad asked the girl from Doriath to follow her and Lalaith did - but not without turning to Thranduil and smiling at him.
The warm bath was just what Lalaith needed after this day. So many things happened. When she got out the bath she realized there was a beautiful forest green dress lying on the bed. Its sleeves were trumpet-shaped and it had elvish embroidery at its neckline. The dress emphasized her female shapes which had been hidden for all this years underneath her Doriath-clothes. "You look gorgeous milady", Edlothiad who had stepped behind her said. "Thank you, and please don't call me milady but Lalaith. I'm just a normal elf", Lalaith told her smiling what made the servants eyes sparkle. Edlothiad took two hair strands on each side from the Doriath-girl braided them and tied the two together in the back. "I think I should take you to the dining room or you won't get anything anymore", Edlothiad told her with a smirk that made Lalaith laugh.
From the moment Lalaith entered the dining room Thranduils look followed her. The appearance of his best friend just caught his breath. The Doriath-elf greeted Oropher with a nod and sat down next to her best friend. "You're looking awesome", he whispered to her and grinned as he saw her blushing.
When dinner was finished she returned to her room because Oropher wanted to discuss something alone with his son. Inside she changed into a white nightdress and tried to sleep. But her thoughts always returned to Thranduil. She wasn't sure what she was feeling for him. Of course he was her best friend and she just got him back but every time he complimented her she blushed. After that thought she wasn't too sure anymore whether it was only 'friendship'. "With patience and time many things get clearer", Lalaith kind of heard her mother's voice in her head. "That's what I'll do, nana (Mommy)", she whispered with a sad smile. She missed her so much!
After the talk with his father Thranduil returned to his chamber. He tried to arrange his thoughts but the picture of Lalaith with the dress in the color of her eyes wasn't possible to forget. Every time he closed his eyes he would see her. So beautiful…
Lalaith stood on a balcony which opened a great view of the village. It had taken her a while to find it but now she enjoyed the fresh air. Shivering Lalaith tried to hold her cape closed. Winter would come soon. "Lalaith! You'll freeze to death out here", a worried voice told her from behind. She felt someone standing close behind her. "I knew I would find you out here", Thranduil whispered in her ear. "Have you been searching me?", she teased him. She leaned back at her best friend's warm chest and he put his arms around her. "I… I… you're right", he told her, it was useless to deny it she knew him too well. She laughed quietly.
"Come on, you shouldn't stand so long out in the cold", he said. "Probably you're right", she mumbled, released herself from his arms and was about to go when she stopped and turned. She didn't know the way back to her room.
Thranduil just realized that she just wore a nightdress and a cape. He tried not to stare but it didn't actually work. "Thranduil?", she tried for the third time now to get his attention. She felt uneasy under his intense look. Thranduil came back to reality when she called him for the fourth time. "Finally", she smirked, "I already thought you wouldn't stop staring at me anymore! I wanted to ask you if you could take me back to my room because I have no idea how to get there." Thranduil felt caught again, his pointy ears blushed. "Of course I'll bring you there", he managed to answer. When they arrived at her room he kissed her forehead, wished her a good night and left.
Confused Lalaith lay in her bed lost in thoughts: 'The way he stared at me it seemed like … No! He kissed me on my forehead like a brother would do.' Disappointed because she hadn't found an answer she fell asleep.
The next day she wore a dark red dress and was determined to find out what Thranduil was thinking. Lalaith nodded to Oropher and sat down next to her best friend to have breakfast. "Maer aur, mellon nîn (Good morning, my friend)", she greeted him. For about a blink she saw disappointment in his eyes but as fast as it appeared it disappeared. "Maer aur (Good morning)", was the only thing he said during the complete breakfast. Right after he finished he excused himself and disappeared.
"Do you know what's going on?", Lalaith asked Oropher. "You should ask him, not me", the King answered. "I don't understand what you mean!", she said confused. "Didn't you realize? My son has never touched any women – he loves you and this since a long time", Thranduils father explained. "I'm such an idiot", Lalaith cursed and started searching Thranduil in the whole palace. He loved her! And she thought she was a sister for him! Lalaith searched everywhere but she didn't even find a sign of him.
Last place she had looked for him where the stables. There she stood crying her face buried in Dúaths mane. "Lalaith?", a voice got her back to reality. She looked up at Mablung, her face wet with tears. "What happened?", he wanted to know. "Thranduil", was all I could say. "He left half an hour ago with his horse Nimloth", Mablung mumbled, "he's probably at his favorite place in the forest" "Where is it?", she asked her voice full of hope. "Nobody knows it", the gate guard said full of sorrow. "I have to find him", Lalaith told herself and got on Dúath, "Hannon le (Thank you)" She gave her horse a touch of the spurs and rode out of the gate.
The moment she was inside the forest she whistled a melody and the birds of Eryn Lasgalen answered chirping. A sparrow landed on her shoulder and squeaked encouraging. "Take me to him, mellon nîn (my friend)", Lalaith whispered to the little one which started to fly. "Follow him Dúath", she ordered her horse. Lalaith sent a thank you prayer to Radagast who had taught her how to speak with birds.
The sparrow stopped at a clearing. In front of a tree it flapped its wings excited. She got off her horse and walked over to the little bird. "Is he up there?", Lalaith asked and it seemed like the sparrow smiled. She brushed his feathers gently and thanked him. The bird flew away and Lalaith started climbing one of the hugest trees in the forest.
Up in the treetop was sitting a silently crying Thranduil. She didn't love him. He was just a friend – a brother – to her. Each of these words felt like little knives stabbing his heart. He had already loved her when they were just children. He thought back to Doriath and the night of the attack. His father had forced him to leave but he hadn't wanted to go without her. So he had gone to her apartment. The door had been crashed by an axe … no he couldn't think about that right now. All these years he had thought he had lost her and now …
With a last effort Lalaith pulled her up in the treetop. Her jaw dropped at this admirable view. It was awesome. The leaves colored in many different types of red at the end of fall. Colorful butterflies were flying around, a steel-blue sky and far away the Lonely Mountain covered in snow-white clouds. It was so gorgeous but she hat to focus on her main mission.
"Thranduil", she called him softly. He didn't show any reactions but she knew he had recognized her so she started to speak: "I … I'm so sorry. I didn't know you loved me. I hoped you would … but yesterday when you kissed me on my forehead … I've only seen siblings doing this – so I thought I'm just a sister for you. Today at breakfast I wanted to find out whether I'm right or not. But I didn't realize until Oropher told me you love me … I'm so sorry I would understand if you can't forgive me – although it would break my heart because I love you Thranduil" Lalaith looked to the ground realizing that she was crying. Her heart seems to crack because of all the emotions spinning inside.
Suddenly she felt fingers softly whipping away her tears. She looked up an into Thranduils ice blue eyes. "I'm so sorry that I made you believe you're only a sister for me. You're a lot more I love you", he said softly and wanted to go on but she stopped him with a kiss. Lalaith laid her arms automatically around his neck. Their lips were gently brushing at first before they deepened it. They put all their emotions inside the kiss, showing each other the love they were feeling. "You own my heart, Thranduil", she whispered with a bright smile after they separated. "And you own mine Lalaith", he answered smiling.
The end
A/N: I hope you enjoyed it and please give me some feedback ;)