Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did, would I be writing fanfiction? JK Rowling owns everything.
Padfoot's Experiment with Shaving
"Padfoot, what the HELL are you doing?"
"I'm shaving, Prongsie."
"And, why, exactly are you shaving your legs?"
"Because, dear Wormtail, it's summertime, so I was watching muggle TV to annoy my mum, and a commercial came up for Venus. I thought that all the girls would love it if I had silky smooth legs to match my silky smooth hair. So, I went out and bought the razor, and now I'm using it."
-Smack-
-Whimper-
"Owwwwwwww, Moony what was that for?"
"You prat. Only GIRLS shave their legs."
"Oh. Whatever. This will only add to my Smex God of Gryffindor status."
"Right. You keep thinking that Padfoot."
"I'm not just thinking. I KNOW Prongsie."
"Just like you knew that Professor McGonagall would let us out of detention if you serenaded her in the Great Hall at breakfast?"
"Sod off Moony. She OBVIOUSLY just doesn't appreciate fine music."
"You were singing to the tune of I'm A Little Teapot."
"Shut it Peter. What is it, pick on Padfoot day?"(A/N: Sorry if that's already been used. I just had to put that in there.)
-- 3 weeks later --
"PADFOOT!!! GUESS WHAT, GUESS WHAT, GUESS WHAT!!!!!!!!"
"Lily finally agreed to go out with you?"
"How did you know? Why did you guess right? You took all of the fun out of it."
-pout-
"Wow. I was just kidding. I didn't think she'd ever agree to that. And I thought love potions were forbidden?"
"Sod off Padfoot. First of all, I DIDN'T use a love potion, just Moony's advice. And second, since when have we stopped doing something since it's forbidden?"
"Good point. Anyways, I still think it was because of the love letter I sent her from you."
"Yeah, right. You're about as deep as a puddle. She ignored me for 3 MONTHS because of the letter YOU sent her. What did you write anyways?"
"Nothing that can be spoken of in present company. Someone might overhear us. It's kinda X-rated"
"I don't really want to know anymore. You're so clueless when it comes to stuff like that."
"Well if I'm so clueless about girls, mate, then why am I going on a date with Arabella in 2 minutes?"
"You're going on a date NOW? Don't you want to finish shaving?"
"I ALREADY shaved Prongsie. And I must go, or I'll be late."
" Ummmm, Padfoot, you might wanna-"
"I thought I made it clear that I have to leave James. Bye."
-- In the Hallway --
"Ummmmm, Padfoot?"
"I'm on my way to a date Moony. I have to go."
"But Padfoot-"
"I have to leave. BYE!"
-snicker-
-- At the date --
"Hey Arabella. I'm here on time. See?"
"Well, actually, you're 5 minutes late."
"A Black must always be casually late."
-giggle-
"Why are those girls laughing at me?"
"-giggle- I think -giggle- because you forgot -giggle-"
"Forgot what? What's so funny?"
"You forgot to shave one of you legs! - laughs uncontrollably-
-- Back in the dorm --
"Why didn't you guys tell me?!?!?"
"We tried mate."
-uncontrollable laughter-
"It's not that funny!"
"Yes, it is."
"Shut UP Moony"
-more uncontrollable laughter-
"Hmph. I'm going to go shave."
-raises nose, and stomps off-
"Remember to shave both legs this time Pads!"
-roll on floor laughing uncontrollably-