I was not feeling as cool as usual this morning; I woke up coughing my lungs out again. Third time this week this has happened. It started a few months ago, at first it was just a small cold but lately I've been coughing none stop. That's not the worst of it though; I've been getting a lot of chest pains and dizziness. Some nights I've ended up vomiting and sometimes….

I looked at the hand I just coughed into; sure enough it was covered with bits of blood. I sighed and clenched my hand. This is pathetic, what was going to happen to me. The uncertainty of my situation was killing me, this never happened to another nation before. Sometimes we'd would get colds or flus, usually when our people were suffering or if there was a plague but in the end we'd survive. We couldn't explain how it works, it just does. There were so many things we personifications couldn't explain like why we existed or how we could live so long. Were we even human? The questions were always there but the answers eluded us all. There was no time to answer them; many people were counting on us to lead them to victory in war and prosperity in peace. Plus, there was no reason to seek those answers; though we've had our ups and downs we were all pretty happy with our lives none of us wanted to change that.

Now, I had to face these questions but I didn't know where to look for the answers. I didn't want to admit it, my life was going so well and there were still some things that I thought I would be able to do. However, this weak and decaying feeling growing inside of me was undeniable. I was going to die; I've known it all along. With this thought I couldn't help but laugh, this isn't a fitting end for the great and awesome Prussia.

My laughing only caused me to cough up some blood. I was glad West wasn't home; I was coughing so loudly there's no doubt that he'd come up here and check up on me. That would be a disaster. My chest hurt so badly and I couldn't stop coughing, he'd know something was wrong.

Suddenly, a small chirping sound came by my window still. I glanced to see a little yellow bird staring at me with concern. My coughing fit stopped so I wiped the blood off of my mouth and smiled at it.

"Sorry Gilbird were you worried," I said lightly padding it on the head.

The bird has been with me ever since I was young. I couldn't explain his appearance or how he could live so long but I was grateful that he was here as my companion. Though I wondered what would happen to him when I'm gone. I could always get West to take care of him I suppose, though he's not that good with animals.

I coughed a little more, no blood came out of my lungs this time, my chest still hurt though. I smiled weakly at the little bird still looking at me with concern.
"You're the only I can tell about this you know because I know you won't treat me any different and I know you won't look at me like I'm weak. Anyone else would either take advantage of me or treat me like some poor dead man walking. Even West would tell me to take it easy and never stop watching me with sad eyes. I'm awesome Prussia and if I'm dying than I'll leave this world the way I came in it damnit."

That's right even if I'm finished I won't stop being awesome I've been hiding it easily, the only who really notices anything different is West but he's been busy with his Axis buddies. He hasn't seen me enough to fully comprehend what's going on with me. I haven't been spending enough time with anyone now that I think about it. Kind of sad since I know I'm leaving this world.

I feel bad for hiding this from West but honestly there's really no point in telling him. It doesn't change a thing if he knows. In fact, it would only make it harder on me.

The yellow bird chirped and hopped on my head to nuzzle in my hair like he always does. As if he was trying to make things normal again. I sure would like that. I want a future that I can see again.

I clutched the cross that around my neck. I just hope that all of my faith would at least win me a little strength to pull me through this. If these were my last days than so be it, I have done enough fighting throughout the years, I'll welcome the rest.

Still there's just one thing left….

"You know there is something I should do before it all ends."

The bird chirped in reply, he already knew what I was talking about.

"I should tell him how I feel; after all I've got nothing left to lose now."