The Mario Fart That Could Not be Trusted, by Dickfart
"Oh oh oh!" said Mario, laying down on the hospital bed as Gay Bowser held his hand. One too many bowls of spaghetti and second helpings of ravioli from Mama Mia's lead them right to this place.
"Push, Mario," said Dr. Mario, Mario's evil clone.
"OhhhhH!" Mario made the push of his life, his butthole clenching like an outraged fist.
"Get me 40cc's of intravenous dextromethorphan, and one of those glowy star things for our patient."
"O K!" said Gay Toad, running out of the room.
"Is he having complications, doctor?" Gay Bowser growled sadly.
"Could be. I've never see one quite this big. Keep pushing, Mario."
"But doctor, I'm a all out of time. Please tell me this isn't how it ends."
Dr. Mario smacked his patient across the face, despite the fact that Mario was not yet hysterical. Gay Bowser dipped his head and cried.
"NYA HA!" said Gay Toad, returning with the star and the drugs.
"Take the star, Mario. It's the only w-"
"NARM!" said George Washington, karate kicking himself into the room. He had been re-animated as though he had never died. Zombie biotechnology has vastly improved over the years.
"What's the meaning of this?" said Dr. Mario.
"If they set that gut bubble free it will be the end of all of us!" said George Washington, aiming his gun at Mario's head.
"HANDS OFF, HE'S MINE!" said Gay Bowser, aiming a fireball at the zombie president.
The fire connected, sending America's first president hurling out the window. Never mind that the room was now engulfed in flames.
"Now is your chance," said Dr. Mario. "Take the star."
"Do what he says, dear," Gay Bowser urged. "He's a doctor. He knows what's best."
"JUST MAKE THIS PAIN GO AWAY!" Mario screeched, allowing Dr. Mario to administer the star.
The moment Mario started glowing, his soft muscles unclenched all at once, releasing the massive, insidious fart from the prison of his bowels. It came out a loud, self-important, orange plume, already old enough to embarrass America with criminally stupid tweets, and an unfortunate mission in life to become president.
"It's a boy!" said Dr. Mario. "What will you call him?"
"Trump," said Mario, with a tear in his eye. Gay Bowser cried, too.
"Perfect," said Dr. Mario, cackling beneath his mask, for he was not a real evil clone of Mario, but much, much worse. Fred Trump was his true identity, but he kept on as Dr. Mario for now, because lolz.
Meanwhile, George Washington watched in horror as the orange plume was released into the world, because he knew he had failed to save the country that he had founded once again.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
The End