The disclaimer telling you that I don't own X-men Evolution characters has been eaten. Sorry. Fred got a bit hungry and well…
Brotherhood Thanksgiving
"I love a parade!" Pietro hooted. They were all spread out watching television on Thanksgiving morning.
"Yeah the Macy's parade is the coolest!" Todd said. "I remember when I lived in the city. I loved the parade when it came by!"
"You saw the parade?" Fred asked Todd.
"Saw it? I was in it yo!" Todd said proudly. "I was riding one of the balloons!"
"You mean the floats," Pietro said.
"No the balloons," Todd said. "I kinda got tangled up in the ropes and to make a long story short, I had a bit of a wild ride."
"Oh boy," Lance grumbled. "Yippee…"
"Oh put a sock in it Lance," Pietro told him. "Just cause Kitty's gone home to her folks for the holiday doesn't mean you should mope around all weekend."
"Yes it does," Lance sulked.
"Why don't you just call her yo?" Todd asked.
"Oh yeah Toad great idea," Lance rolled his eyes. "I'll just pick up the phone and say, 'Is Kitty there? This is Lance. You know the guy who nearly killed all of you by dropping an entire school on you?'! Yeah that'll work!"
"Not exactly the best way to get tight with your future in laws, huh Lance?" Todd laughed.
"Well Thanksgiving is a stupid holiday anyway," Lance crossed his arms.
"No it's not!" Fred protested. "It's one of the greatest holidays on earth in my opinion!"
"Big surprise," Lance drawled. "Don't you know the story behind Thanksgiving?"
"Yeah," Todd said. "It's when the Vikings all had a good harvest and they got together with the Indians and they had a feast."
"Pilgrims Toad," Lance closed his eyes. "The Pilgrims."
"Okay they had a party. So what's wrong with that?" Pietro asked.
"Don't you morons know anything?" Lance asked. "Oh I forgot, you don't. Listen, The Pilgrims came uninvited to America on the territory of Native Americans. They were starving to death so the Indians decide to help them out. They figure it was the neighborly thing to do. What could happen right? So they teach them how to get food and plant crops and then they all have a great big feast to celebrate the harvest. Well the next day the Pilgrims say to themselves, 'Hey, we don't need those Indians anymore.' And what happens? They steal their land and turn it into golf courses. That's what Thanksgiving is about."
"But they look so happy on the floats," Tabitha said.
"Propaganda put out by the greeting card companies and turkey farms so that they can make a profit!" Lance told them.
"Wow I did not know that," Todd said.
"You think that's bad wait until I tell you the sinister plot behind St. Patrick's day," Lance said.
"As much as I'd love to listen to Lance lecture us on American history," Pietro got up. "Someone's got to make dinner. I'll do it."
"Good thing we got groceries yesterday," Lance remarked. He glanced over and saw Pietro make a flurry of activity in the kitchen. The rest of them just watched television. They knew it was dangerous to go into a kitchen with Pietro cooking.
After the parade was over, Lance yawned and stretched on the couch. "So what do you wanna watch now?" He asked.
"Hey can we go outside and play some touch football?" Tabitha asked.
"Are you insane?" Todd asked. "Sorry I forgot who I was talking to."
"Last time we did that we nearly spent a week in the hospital," Lance sighed. "Don't ask."
"Well I don't feel like watching football games on TV," Tabitha folded her arms. "No body said you had to," Lance said.
"Yeah you can help Pietro in the kitchen," Todd said.
Tabitha looked at the flurry of activity. "So what teams are playing?" she finally asked.
A few more hours later, Pietro zipped in. "Hey anybody wanna help me set the table? I have other stuff to do as well."
"I'll do it!" Todd hopped in and began to help.
"Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!" Todd hopped up and down excitedly. "I'm gonna have a real Thanksgiving! A real Thanksgiving!"
"Okay Toad calm down," Pietro laughed as he watched Todd set the table. "Let's see, we got mashed potatoes with gravy, cornbread, corn, green-beans, rolls, the ever important stuffing…"
"Two kinds," Todd chirped. "One with sausage and one without! Boy those microwave stuffings are the best!"
"Uh huh," Pietro went over his checklist. "Cranberry sauce…"
"Fresh from the can!" Todd's eyes glazed at the perfect oblong tower of cranberry.
"Let's see what else," Pietro looked over the list. "We got some fresh fruits, raw vegetables with dips, potato chips, seventeen pumpkin pies for dessert. And that just leaves the main course!" He pointed to a platter covered with a huge silver cover. "Okay. HEY YOU GUYS COME AND GET IT!"
The rest of them entered the dining room and sat down. "Wow! Look at the spread!" Fred marveled.
"You ain't seen nothing yet! Voila!" Pietro uncovered the main course. They all looked at it.
"Hot dogs?" Lance asked. There was a huge pile of hot dogs in buns with toppings on them.
"Turkey hot dogs!" Pietro corrected. "With cheese and chili sauce!"
"All right!" Fred licked his lips and rubbed his hands together. "Now that's what I call a meal! Let's chow down guys!"
"Shouldn't we say grace first or something?" Tabitha asked.
"Okay. Grace," Lance reached for some rolls. Pietro slapped his hand. "What?"
"I think that's a nice idea," Pietro said. "Why don't we all say something we're all thankful for?"
"What do you think we are the Waltons?" Lance snapped. "What do we have to be grateful about? We're broke. We live in a crummy dump and go to a stupid crummy school populated by losers, jocks and X-Geeks. What could we possibly be thankful for?"
"Well for one thing, we could be thankful that we're not X-Geeks!" Todd said.
"He's got a point there," Fred said.
"And I'm also thankful that we're all together," Todd added. "I never had a real family before. I'm happy."
"Aw isn't that sweet?" Tabitha cooed.
"Yeah real heartwarming," Lance grumbled. "Can we eat now?"
"No!" Pietro said. "We all gotta do it! I'm next! I am also grateful to be in the wonderful company of the Brotherhood! I am also grateful that I am so wonderful, talented, handsome…"
"Modest," Lance muttered.
"Quiet Lance! I am thankful that I have my health, my friends, a roof over my head, my wonderful mutant abilities, my looks, my talent…"
"An ego the size of Australia."
"Lance knock it off? Where was I? I've lost count."
"As well as your marbles."
"I'm warning you Lance!" Pietro snapped. "I'm trying to be serious here!"
"That's a first."
"As I was saying," Pietro gave a dirty look at Lance. "I am go grateful we are all here to share this wonderful bounty that I have prepared with my own magnificent hands. And as we sit to dine here today, think about those who have gone before us. For we are all a part of the circle of life! One…"
"Pietro put a sock in it so we can eat already!" Lance shouted.
"My turn," Tabitha took a drink of soda. "I'm grateful I'm not in jail. Rocky?"
"I'm grateful that I'm the only member of this team with more than one brain cell," Lance said. "Now can we eat?"
"Fred has to do it, yo," Todd pointed out.
"We all know what his is," Lance snapped. "He's grateful there's food on the table."
"Not just that!" Fred said. "I got other stuff too!"
"Yeah let him finish Lance," Pietro said. "Go on Freddy."
"Well I'm most thankful for the fact that I'm over Jean," Fred said. "Otherwise I'd be acting as stupid as Lance over there."
"I am not acting stupid over Kitty!" Lance snapped.
"Yeah right," Pietro snickered. He was stopped when Lance shoved a roll into his mouth.
"Stuff it Pietro!" Lance snapped. Pietro glared at him and stuffed a roll in his mouth.
"Well Lance finally got his roll," Todd smiled.
"You little creep," Lance tossed a roll at Pietro. He dodged it and it hit Tabitha.
"Hey!" She snapped. "How could you hit me?"
"I don't see how he could not have missed you," Pietro grinned.
"Oh Speedy…" Tabitha smiled dangerously.
"What?" Pietro helped himself to the mashed potatoes. He looked down and saw that they were glowing. "Huh?"
BOOM!
They all laughed at the sight of Pietro covered in mashed potatoes. "Okay, you are all dead!" He flung food wildly at the rest of them. They were splattered with food.
"Okay this is war!" Lance shouted. Soon all of them were having a wild food fight. Todd grabbed stray rolls with his tongue. Lance shoved a pie in Tabitha's face. Fred and Pietro were whacking each other and dueling with hot dogs and squirting each other with ketchup.
An hour later the members of the Brotherhood house lay all over the room. There was as much food in their bellies as there was on the walls. "I am so full…" Todd moaned.
"I feel so bloated," Fred said.
"You are bloated Freddy," Lance said.
"I just had a thought," Tabitha said.
"Wow," Pietro quipped. "Call the newspapers."
"I'm serious," Tabitha said. "There's a holiday today, right? That means there's no school."
"Yes Tabby that's very good," Lance moaned as he shifted to find a more comfortable position on the couch. "Tomorrow we'll learn how to tell time."
"And if it's a holiday," She continued. "Most of the X-Men will be gone visiting their families. Except maybe for Scott and Blue and Rouge and one or two other kids. Basically, the mansion's pretty much deserted."
"Uh huh," Fred groaned.
"Nobody there. Practically defenseless…" She spoke.
"Yeah Tabby so…?" Lance sat up immediately. They all looked at each other as if they had the same thought.
"Okay," Lance grinned. "Here's the plan…"
A while later at the mansion the remaining members of the X-men were just sitting down to dinner when the alarm went off.
"Aw man!" Rogue complained. A blur raced through the room throwing food everywhere.
"Three guesses who did this," Logan muttered as he looked around. HAPPY THANKSGIVING YOU TURKEYS! Was written on the dining room walls in spray paint.
"Not again!" Scott muttered as he looked outside the window. "Aw man, look what they did to the outside of the house!"
The entire mansion was covered with feathers. "You know we really should look into getting a better security system," Hank moaned.
From their hiding place, the Brotherhood surveyed the damage, laughing.
"You know something," Lance said. "I was wrong. Thanksgiving is a great holiday!"