Your Fault

No one came to Darcy's room voluntarily. And they definitely did not do it a three in the morning. So when she heard the quiet knock, she was less than pleased.

As she swung the door open, she complained, "do you know what time it i-" Then she stopped. She hadn't expected to see Bruce standing there, and she certainly hadn't expected to see him so upset.

"Can I come in?" he asked in a soft voice. Darcy realized with a start that he had been crying. She let him pass her without a word.

When they sat down on the couch, Darcy asked softly, "what's up, Doc?" Normally that would have been accompanied with a laugh, but she knew better this time. This time was different.

"We were on a mission," Bruce said, his voice barely above a whisper. Darcy had to strain to hear him.

"So that was where you guys were today," she murmured.

"It was my fault," he whimpered, "I couldn't control it. I tried, but I couldn't calm down. He was too angry."

Bruce wasn't making much sense, but from what Darcy could figure, something bad had happened involving the Hulk, "what was your fault?"

"They got hurt," he said softly, "everyone but Thor. I hurt them."

"Hey," Darcy frowned, "that wasn't your fault. Something must be bugging the big guy. There's nothing you could have done." Darcy firmly believed that Bruce and the Hulk were two separate people. She also firmly believed that when the Hulk got out of control, it was because of something Bruce did. But she wasn't sure she should mention that just yet.

Instead, she cuddled up against him, letting him cry into her shoulder. "Clint's in a coma. Natasha's been in and out of consciousness, but they say she's getting worse. Tony's got a broken arm, a concussion, and at least three broken ribs. Steve's in pretty bad shape too, but he's healing quickly, so I guess that's good." Darcy couldn't be sure if Bruce was still talking to her. He didn't direct the words at her, but she was the only one in the room. And if Bruce was talking to himself…

"They'll be okay," Darcy comforted him, "they're the Avengers. They'll pull though."

"What if they don't?" Bruce asked, "Tony will be okay after a while, and Steve will bounce back pretty quickly. But what about Natasha and Clint? What if Clint never wakes up? And they said Natasha was getting worse…" He put his face in his hands.

"You've already said that," Darcy reminded Bruce gently.

"I hurt everyone I care about," he murmured, "I warned Tony I should leave. I warned all of them. And now look." He groaned, "Why?"

Darcy wasn't entirely sure what he was asking, or if it was rhetorical or not, but she answered anyway, "dude, you're Bruce Banner. Of all the people who could have ended up as a giant green rage monster, it was you, and maybe that's because you're one of the few people who can fix what you've done. You can help them."

"I can hurt them," he argued, but there was absolutely no fight in his voice, no hint of the playfulness he usually had when he argued with Darcy. Bruce's voice was just…dead. He was scaring her, and it had nothing to do with the Hulk.

Darcy wrapped an arm around him, rubbing his shoulder gently, "Bruce, listen to me. They all know the risks of being around you. But they do it anyway, and you want to know why?" When Bruce didn't even look at her, Darcy continued, "They stay with you because they like you. You're their friend, and if you think that they're going to let you just leave them, you're not nearly as smart as I pegged you to be."

Now she had Bruce's attention, "people leave. It happens. They'll get over it."

Well, after that remark, Darcy felt like hitting him, "Thor left Jane, and she didn't get over it. Not until he came back to her, like he promised."

"That's different," he muttered, "Thor's a hero, and he saved Jane's life."

"And the Hulk saved Tony's life, and Manhattan, and probably the world," Darcy shot back, past her soothing, "stop trying to make excuses. Tony's not going to let you go, and neither is anybody else."

"They can't stop me," Bruce said sullenly.

Darcy was starting to get seriously worried about him. She knew Bruce had suffered very severe depression before, which had led to him trying to kill himself. It was a story Jane had made sure she was well acquainted with. The astrophysicist had wanted Darcy to know exactly what kind of man Dr. Banner could be. Not that it had dissuaded Darcy in the least.

Her voice was much softer when she said, "I'll stop you."

Bruce frowned slightly, "Darcy, I know we're friends, but-"

"Bruce, friends are there for each other no matter what. And you know full well that I would be happier if we were more than friends."

"That's not safe," Bruce reminded her.

Darcy looked at him with pleading eyes, "please don't leave, Bruce." Great. Now she was crying too.

Bruce looked like he wasn't sure how to react to a suddenly very upset Darcy. He shifted slightly, pulling her onto his lap on instinct, cradling her. "I know you're scared," she murmured, "and I know that when you get scared, you back off. But please, please don't leave."

"Darcy," Bruce sighed. How could he make her see that this was best? "I don't want anyone else to get hurt because of me."

"That's bullshit, and you know it," Darcy choked out, "you don't get it, do you? It's you he's mad at. And if you do something about that, you won't have to worry about him."

"What are you talking about?" Bruce asked, bewildered.

"You keep him locked up, call him a monster, and try to get rid of him, but he's only ever protected you. If I was him, I'd be just as ticked off."

"You think it's my fault?"

"I know it is." She didn't want to take her eyes off him, silently daring him to challenge what she had said.

Instead, he hung his head, "you're probably right. I'm sorry for upsetting you."

Darcy twisted in her position on his lap to fluff his hair, "just let him out every once in a while, when there isn't a threat. Show him you accept him. And stay. The others will understand what happened, and they'll recover. Just promise you won't leave."

Bruce stared down at Darcy, before pressing his lips to her hair and saying very softly, "I promise, I'll never leave. Not unless you ask me to."

"You'll be waiting a long time if you expect me to ask for that," Darcy mumbled, and tipped her head up so that she could return the kiss, just as gently, to his lips.