"I love you."
Felicity awoke from her dream – well it was more of a memory, really – sweating. She always had the same dream over and over again. The past month anyway. His words haunted her. His last words to her. She hadn't heard from him since he left her in the foundry to fight Ra's Al Ghul. He left her standing there, the words on her tongue, but no courage to say them.
Why was she having such a difficult time telling the man she loves that she loves him? She knew she did. It was obvious the way her body reacted to him; the way she always knew where he was in the room. When he had told her he loved her yet again, it was her chance. There was no ruse this time. He wasn't telling her they couldn't be together. She could've said it.
But, alas, she didn't. She couldn't. Not under those circumstances. He was leaving to fight "one of the most dangerous men who's ever walked the earth" and she wouldn't let Ra's have that moment. She wouldn't let this man she had never even met control her love for Oliver in such a dark way. No. She would say those words when it was right; when there was no danger or probability of death. She would do it on her time. Not anyone else's.
Well, that's what Felicity thought. She thought Oliver would beat Ra's, come home, and she'd say those words. She believed that deep in the crevices of her heart. But when it had been a week and he hadn't returned, she knew something terrible had happened. She knew he wasn't dead. She would feel it in her heart if he was dead – life would be unbearable if he was dead. But she knew something had happened since he hadn't returned.
She looked at her alarm clock in her room and it read 4:23 a.m. She wouldn't be getting anymore sleep. Sadly, that was the norm for her right now. With Oliver gone, Felicity, Diggle, and Roy were all working double time in trying to keep the city safe. She knew it is what Oliver would want, but she was exhausted. She was getting home at 1 a.m., going to bed, then waking up from her nightmares about a man she loved who was missing.
Life really was a bitch sometimes.
It was another night in the foundry and Felicity had just sent Roy off to the other side of the Glades where there was a robbery happening at a convenience store. Diggle had taken the night off to spend some time with Lyla and Sara, so it was just her in the foundry. She stood, looking at the green hood that still stood in the middle of the foundry. Felicity walked to it and let her hand run over the material that hadn't been worn in over a month.
Her chest ached at the thought that it could just sit there in the foundry forever, never to be worn again. She told Oliver she didn't want to die down there all those months ago after Sara's death, but the day he walked out to fight Ra's was the day her heart had left with him. Without him, she was dead. She was a walking, talking zombie. She knew it wasn't healthy, but she didn't know how to stop the ache she felt in her chest where her heart should've been.
As she stood there, she wondered if he was trying to make his way back to her. If he was thinking about her, or if he was fighting so hard to survive that he couldn't. She knew she hadn't stopped thinking about him, but she wasn't fighting to survive in the same way he was. He was fighting for his life. She was simply fighting to live her life. But would it truly be living without the love of her life?
Felicity highly doubted it.
Another month had passed with no word from Oliver or the League of Assassins. Felicity had finally picked herself up enough to go to work (after a lot of mint chip ice cream) two weeks ago. She had seen Ray, but she immediately told him she was just there to work. She couldn't ever be with him and she knew that from the moment he kissed her. Her heart would always belong to Oliver and his absence had only proven that point.
Felicity was just leaving work when her phone rang and Diggle's caller ID shown. She answered quickly, wondering what couldn't wait for the twenty minute drive to the foundry.
"Hey Digg. I'm just leaving-" Felicity started, but was cut off.
"Felicity. I need you to keep calm and get here fast." Diggle replied, seeming out of breath.
Her heart raced at the thought that Oliver could have returned, but she quickly pushed that down, knowing she couldn't get her hopes up.
"Okay. What's going on?" She asked calmly, trying to control her breathing.
"It's Oliver. He's… back." Felicity barely heard him before her phone had slipped from her hand and fell to the pavement. The shock wore off and Felicity hurried to her car, speeding all the way to Verdant.
Her phone was still on the pavement, forgotten.
"Diggle. Where is he?" Felicity was rushing down the stairs and shouting her question before the door even closed behind her. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she froze in her tracks. In the middle of the foundry, standing by her computers, was Oliver.
Her breath caught in her throat at the side of him. She half expected him to be doubling over, but she should've known he would be standing tall, dressed in jeans and a sweater. She couldn't see any injuries, but she knew there must've been some since it took him so long to return home. To return to her.
When his head rose from her computers to her, the look on his face stole her breath. He looked… defeated.
"Felicity." She heard him say, and she had never heard anything sweeter. The way he said her name always took her breath away, but this time… it sounded like he thought she had died. Not the other way around.
"Oliver. What… Where have you been?" She needed to know. She had come up with so many ridiculous ideas of where he had been and she needed him to tell her. To answer the questions that had plagued her for months.
Oliver was still standing by her computers and Felicity was still at the bottom of the stairs, not sure she could handle getting closer to him just yet. She needed the space to get her answers. Getting closer to him would only cause all resemblance of sense to go out the door. She couldn't break down… not yet.
"I was in a cave on the mountain where I met Ra's. Maseo, who is a man that helped me during the 5 years I was away, saved me and kept me safe until I could heal enough to come home. I would've been back sooner, but I had to wait to make sure it was safe. Not only for me, but for Thea and you as well. If he knew I was alive, he would kill all of you and I couldn't let that happen."
Oliver had taken 2 steps towards her while he was talking, and all of her senses were in overdrive. His scent hadn't changed; he still had his distinct Oliver smell and Felicity closed her eyes and breathed him in. When she opened her eyes, she allowed herself to really look at him for the first time. She noticed he was hunched over just a bit, but not enough for anyone who didn't really know him as well as she did to notice. He looked exhausted and she wondered if he could tell she felt the way he looked.
"Oliver…"
"Felicity…"
They started at the same time and each of them smiled. It helped ease the severity of the moment for a second, but it was back before they even noticed.
"I love you." Felicity said, staring him in his eyes. She couldn't hold it in anymore. She had been regretting not saying it since the day he left and she wouldn't regret it anymore. She wouldn't ever withhold the way she felt for Oliver Queen ever again. "I know I'm late and I should've said it months ago, but I love you, Oliver. I have loved you since you showed up in my office with a bullet-ridden laptop and a lame excuse. I mean, it wasn't that lame, but it kinda was because-"
Felicity was cut off with Oliver's lips on hers. She hadn't even seen him move from his position by the computers. She melted into him, clenching his sweater at his hips to stay upright, as his lips molded themselves to hers and she smiled against his lips. She had waited for this for so long.
He slid his tongue across her lips for entrance and she greedily opened for him. They had kissed before, but this felt so different. This felt… like the beginning. She knew they had a lot to talk about with everything that happened with Ra's, but she didn't care. She needed tonight with him. Just this one night together.
They broke apart, both of them panting and rested their foreheads against each other. They were both smiling and Felicity closed her eyes, trying to remember everything there was to remember about this moment. She felt Oliver's breath against her face as he cupped her cheek and started rubbing his thumb along her jaw.
"Felicity." He breathed, causing her to open her eyes. When she looked into his eyes, she saw so many emotions there. Happiness, relief, and love. Pure, real love. Felicity knew her eyes were reflecting the same emotions his were. "I love you."
She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him again.
She could get used to this.