Title: Remarkable
Rating: T
Spoilers: L.D.S.K. 01x06
Warnings: Mild coarse language, slight OOCness and minor suicidal thoughts.
Words Count: 1,944
Summary: What if during L.D.S.K. Reid had taken to heart all of the things that Hotch had said about him?

Shakespeare wrote, "Nothing is so common as the wish to be remarkable."

"They knew he was in here and they knew he was armed and dangerous and they knew he was going to fight to the last round. And they sent me in here with an unarmed kid who can't shoot his way out of a wet paper bag!"

The subway stopped and he got off the train, walking up the stairs with people elbowing past him roughly. The words swirled around his head as he made the short walk to the F.B.I.'s building, quickly getting screened at security before making his way to the elevator.

"Ya know why they took away boy genius' gun? He failed his qualifications."

The elevator pinged as he arrived at this floor, briskly walking through the bullpen to the break room to grab some coffee. The words that Agent Hotchner had viciously spoken during their last case kept repeating themselves in his head and he poured more sugar then coffee into his mug.

"Twice a year I gotta listen to him whine about requalifying, so I tutor him."

Reid sat down at his desk opposite from Elle's as he started on the stack of files that he swears Morgan and Greenaway add to from their own piles.

"And he fails again."

Spencer pushed his light brown locks roughly away from his face as he tried to concentrate on the paperwork in front of him, the cruel words resurfacing again and again. Elle and Morgan glanced at the twenty-four year old as he made a frustrated sound.

"Put them next to the barricade; that way when they blast their way in here both of our problems are solved."

Tears came to his eyes as he thought about all of the horrible things that had been said about him. He knew that Hotch was just trying to empathize with the unsub and hadn't meant it, but Spencer also knew that everything he said was true. Reid had failed his qualifications—as he usually did—, Hotch had tutored him as always and Reid knew that he complained about it every time that the qualifications came up.

"I figure the chances of my getting out of here alive are pretty slim."

"So?"

"I wanna kick the snot out of this kid."

Is that really what Hotch wanted to do? Was his dying wish to beat him? To kick him so hard that he would be feeling the pain for moths after? Reid shook his head at the thought. Of course not! Why would that be my boss's last wish?

As much as Reid tried to convince himself that Hotchner was just trying to get the two of them and the hostages out of there alive, his mind kept telling him that Hotch hated him and that the team felt the same. They all wanted him dead and they all wanted the chance to beat him, just like the bullies in high school.

"He's made my life miserable for three lousy years."

Reid had been on the BAU team since he was twenty-one, had he been making people's lives miserable since he could legally drink? Or had he been doing that since he was little? Probably. I mean my Dad left me, didn't he? Spencer harshly wiped the tears off of his face. He needed to stop thinking about that! Of course he hadn't been making other people's lives miserable! Hotch was just trying to save his, mine and many other people's lives! But is that what he really thought of me?

When the Dowd had told Hotch to 'knock yourself out', Hotch hadn't hesitated to throw Reid to the ground. He hadn't flinched as he kicked Reid continually in the stomach and groin. He'd been ruthless and relentless in his attacks. He hadn't just been acting; he was truly trying to hurt Spencer. It was like he wanted me to feel the pain. It's probably what three years of pent up rage feels like.

"How smart are you now, smart guy?"

Elle and Morgan shared a look from across the walkway of their desks as they heard Reid sniffle and then cough. They watched as his hands roughly raked through his brown hair and shove it behind his ear. His hands shook as they picked up his coffee, spilling a little bit on the edge of a piece of paper. The young genius swore under his breath and the two older agents shared another look; Spencer never swore!

"It's front sight, trigger press, follow through!"

Reid didn't think he'd ever forget how to properly shoot a gun again. The words danced through his head every time he saw a firearm, involuntarily flinching as he thought about the brutal kicks that had been aimed straight at his stomach punctuating every step.

"It's not that hard! A Dalmatian could do it!"

Usually Spencer would have sprouted off some random fact about how it was impossible for a canine to even hold a gun, let alone press the trigger for lack of opposable thumbs but even after the incident; he couldn't bring himself to think of the speech he would have likely given under different circumstances. Maybe that was why nobody liked him? He always went off on prolonged oratories on topics that nobody cared about and was often told to shut up or hurry up and get to the point. Maybe he should just stop talking? Stop sprouting off facts that he found interesting; obviously nobody shared his sentiment and wished that he would shut up.

"I think he got the message."

Sure did, boss. Were the words that crossed Reid's mind every time that particular line surfaced in his memory. Morgan and Elle were soon joined by JJ with their concerned glances as the blonde joined the others in the bullpen, her arms file free. They watched in alarm as their co-worker and friend clenched his fists tightly, his knuckles turning white.

"You all right?"

"Yeah." Sorry to disappoint you. Reid though sardonically.

"Nice shot." Don't patronize me.

"I was aiming for his leg." Mock me or whatever. I know I'm a bad shot. Sorry to waste your time!

"I wouldn't have kept kicking, but I was afraid that you didn't get my plans." Your plans to fulfill your wish of beating me to death?

"I got your plan the minute you moved the hostages out of my line of fire." Yeah, that's when I got your plans!

"Well, I hope I didn't hurt you too badly."

Reid somehow knew that he only meant physically, not mentally or emotionally. He didn't care if he had hurt Reid with his words; they were true after all. Maybe he thought they would get me to shut up? To make me stop making his life so miserable.

By this point Elle had gone to get Hotch and Gideon while Morgan was steadily getting more worried for his best friend and JJ was debating whether to talk to him or wait for their superiors. Her mind was quickly made up for her as a thick red substance trailed its way down Reid's bare arm to pool at the crook of his elbow where his shirt sleeves were pulled up to, soaking the blue material a purple color.

"Spence!" JJ cried, prying his fingers out of the tightly clenched fist, revealing deep, half moons on his palms and bloody fingernails. Morgan winced as he saw the wounds and Spencer roughly pulled away his arm.

"Don't touch me!" He nearly growled as he stood up swiftly. At this moment Elle returned with Hotch and Gideon.

"Reid!" Hotch yelled in a scolding tone.

"What?" Reid shouted back in an irritated manner.

"First of all, do not take that tone of voice with me. Second of all, you do not ever treat a woman in that manner. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Dad." Spencer spat out.

Hotchner flinched. He knew how Reid regarded his father: he basically hated him. Hotch didn't want to be compared to someone with such a negative impact in his youngest agents life.

"Hey! What's the matter with you?" Bellowed Morgan at his best friend.

"The matter with me? The matter with me? Why would anything be wrong besides the fact that you all hate me?" Was Reid's loud answer. By this point the BAU team was happy that the bullpen was relatively empty today; glad that no other F.B.I. agents were around to witness Dr. Reid's breakdown.

"Hate you? Kid, none of us here hate you! How could we? We love you, man!" Was Morgan's incredulous answer.

"Bullshit!" Was his reply.

"Spence, what would make you think that?" JJ asked in a broken whisper.

"As if you don't know, Jareau!" Reid ground out. "I can't take this anymore! I can't take the pretending and the lying and the talking behind my back! I can't take the fact that you all resent me and don't want me on this team! I can't live with the fact that you're dying wish would be to beat me! I just can't take this!" And with that, the young genius ran out of the bullpen, bypassing the elevator and sprinting down the staircase.

JJ had tears running down her face and Morgan had seemed to settle into shock. Greenaway couldn't get her head around the fact that Spencer Reid had just had a breakdown. Hotch didn't know what to feel and Gideon knew exactly what was going on, as he always did with the young doctor.

"Why would he think something like that?" JJ whimpered.

"I think that last case did him in." Gideon replied, speaking for the first time since arriving in the bullpen.

"Why do you mean?" Aaron asked.

"You tell me, Hotch." Jason replied. "Whose last wish was it to beat him? Whose life has he been making miserable for the past three years? Who does he complain to every time he fails his qualifications?"

Aaron felt decidedly awful. He had been the one to cause his youngest team members breakdown.

"Don't beat yourself up, Aaron. Remember how he was treated when he was younger, remember how he's treated on cases and remember how he was treated when he first joined the BAU." Gideon said to ease Hotch's guilt, increasing Morgan's tenfold. Morgan knew he had been bad to the kid when he first joined the team and he knew that the genius hadn't deserved that.

"Damn it." Derek muttered, standing up and running to the elevator that had just chimed, pressing the ground floor button repeatedly, while picking up his cell phone and speed dialing his best friend.

Meanwhile Reid was walking the streets of Quantico, thinking about what he should do next. Maybe if he stopped being so smart, people would like him. He knew that it was logically impossible for him not to be a genius, so he'd settle for shutting his trap and not speaking out of turn with his stupid little facts that no one in their right mind would ever give a damn about. He needed to stop 'lording his smarts over other people' as he had been told many times by different people at various times of his life. 'Stop being so remarkable,' they would say, 'it annoys the hell out of people!'.

"Maybe if I were dead I wouldn't be so 'remarkable'." Spencer muttered. His thoughts circling around the fact that Gideon was right: you don't need a gun to kill someone; in fact you just needed the right words and they were dead. Spencer felt as if the words that Hotch had said to him were killing him.

Soo, I was just watching L.D.S.K. and got inspiration for this little peice. If you guys want me to make this a two shot and have a little bit of the 'Hurt/Comfort' stuff that the category specfies it as, then review or message or something and tell me to write the second part! ( : Ohh and the second part (if I write it) might be a little bit slashy if you squint! Or maybe obviously if I feel like it...! :P