A/N: This thought wouldn't leave my head when I saw the Regai Arc. I hope you enjoy this shortie :) Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach

Title: Anniversary Mishaps

Rating/Genre: T for safe, Humor/Romance

Characters: Shunsui, Ukitake, Regai Shunsui

Warning: just the usual perversion ;)

Anniversary Mishaps

Shunsui raised the colorful bouquet of flowers to his nose and inhaled deeply letting the sweet scents of tulips, lilacs, sweet peas, and more run through his calm mind. He hummed a soft tune as he made his way to his old friend's quarters at the Ugendo, a smile plastered on his face and a kick in his step. Today marked one of the many days in the many centuries Ukitake and himself had found more in each other than just a friendship, and on each anniversary date Shunsui made it his solemn duty to make the special day just more special than the last.

A rather intimate morning, lunch, an intimate afternoon, lazing in the soft fields, dinner and sake, followed by a romantic night to themselves. Shunsui sighed to himself in delight. Yes, today was going to go wonderfully.

Arriving at the Ugendo Shunsui subdued is rietsu and stepped softly on the wooden floor, sneaking around to the door to surprise his best friend. As soon as he made it to the bamboo tarp door he paused as a certain noise beyond the door caught his attention immediately.

Moaning…hmm. Was his darling Jyuu-chan ill? He listened closer as he could hear hushed words beyond the moaning.

"Uuh…oh…yes, r-right there…."

Shunsui blinked, his mind going blank. 'Jyuushirou…what are you…?'

"Ah! Oh. Yes! Yes! Ungh, you're an animal, my love!"

The bearded captain felt his heart sink to the pit of his stomach, his gut twisting in pain. Jyuushirou…his sweet high-moral Jyuu-chan…was sleeping around on him? It couldn't be! But the sounds, the moans…Jyuushirou only made those kinds of noises when they were…. Shunsui grabbed his chest where his heart was, feeling it break under his touch.

The heartbreak was soon replaced by a surge of anger. He had to stop this! It wasn't right! It wasn't fair! Shunsui may have been the flirt of the two, what with all the women he sugared and gushed over, but he never touched them!

Seething, Shunsui ripped through the tarp and stormed in to see two bodies shuffling under the blankets in Jyuushirou's bed.

"Jyuushirou!" He attempted to roar; only his roar came out more of a feminine yelp.

There was a gasp, followed by the cease of shuffling. A messy white haired head popped up from under the blankets, emerald eyes wide and frantic.

"Shunsui?!"

"That's right, Shunsui!" He threw the bouquet on the floor and stomped it dramatically. "Why, Jyuu? What have I done to deserve this?"

"B-But Shunsui, if you're here, then…."

"Don't. On the most important day you have to go and throw it all away! I mean you could have just asked to have a threeway, I would have obliged, but this!"

"Sh-Shun, wait a minute, you don't under…."

"No, Jyuushirou! You broke my heart!" Shunsui slapped his chest and raised a weary hand to his head.

"Yare yare, do I always sound this bad?" The other body from under the covers unveiled himself, a large tanned hand coming up to scratch his messy long brown hair, lazy gray eyes peering at Shunsui with mild agitation.

The room suddenly went silent, and Shunsui could only blink in a stupor as he stared at the naked form of himself snuggled close to his frantic lover.

Jyuushirou tried to wiggle out of the imposter Shunsui's grip, eyes pleading at the real Shunsui. "Shun, I was trying to tell you! I thought he was you! I swear!"

"Oh…."

"Maa, don't be mad at him, Shun! I mean, just look at that face." The Regai Shunsui gripped Jyuushirou's chin. "How can you be mad at that?"

Taking his hat off Shunsui gave a tired sigh and made his way to the bed. "No…I'm not mad anymore."

Jyuushirou blinked with adorable confusion. "Y-You're not?"

"No…I mean, technically he is me. And he is devilishly handsome." Shunsui crawled in to bed next to his lover, winking at the Regai Shunsui on the other side.

"You're not too bad yourself, Casanova."

Jyuushirou whipped his head from side to side at both his lovers. "Whaa…wait a second! This has got to be wrong on some level, right?"

Both Shunsui's raised a finger to their chin at thought, both mumbling a "no…can't think of anything wrong."

"Now," Shunsui ran his fingers up the white haired man's pale chest and licked his lips, "where did you leave off before I so rudely interrupted?"

A mischievous spark of purple electricity jolted through the Regai's eyes as he caught on. "You know that trick we do so well with our tongue? Yeah, that's where we stopped."

"Ah, of course."

Jyuushirou swatted at the two identical pairs of hands groping him. "Stop! Wait, I don't think we should…!"

"Nonsense, Jyuu-chan!" Both Shunsui's chimed. "We're just showing you the best anniversary yet!"

The pale man's face burned with a bright red blush. "Ah! No! We should…hey! Stop that! Wait! NO!"

End

A/N: I blame Austin Powers for this one. I hope you all enjoyed :)