She squeezed her eyes shut as she held his hand in hers and felt the relief pulse through her. The warmth of his skin and the sound of his breathing comforted her in a way she would never have understood before the events of the evening. Opening her eyes she reached her free hand up to run it softly through his hair. He looked peaceful now. His face no longer contorted in pain, his mouth no longer covered in blood, his eyes no longer wide and frightened. Leaning forward she pressed her lips to his forehead before retaking her seat at the side of his bed and holding tightly to his hand. Cradling it in both of hers she closed her eyes once more to fight against the tears she could feel behind them. The tears she had not let fall since it had begun. Since … she pushed the memory away and opened her eyes to focus on his resting form.
"Lady Grantham?" Dr. Clarkson's voice was gentle, she could hear the tiredness in it as she heard his footsteps enter the room.
Wiping a quick hand across her cheek to banish the tear that had found its way free she turned her head to greet him.
"Dr. Clarkson. I did not know you were still here." She offered him a smile, it was weak and shaky but it was a smile none the less and he deserved it.
Motioning for her to remain as she was he moved into the room to the other side of Robert's bed and gently lifted the blanket on his side.
"I wanted to check on him one more time before going home. His bandages look good, still clean, though I expect they will need to be changed again come morning." Lowering the blanket he took the other seat and shared in the silence a moment. He glanced at her hands cradling Robert's limp one and looked away.
"That was good of you … I … that is … I will never be more glad of having you for dinner." Cora began, absently bringing Robert's hand to her lips as she kissed his knuckles before lowering it again to the bed and covering it with her hand.
"It was indeed a fortunate time to be there." The Dr nodded, looking across the sleeping man at his wife. Her eyes tired and scared, but the relief on her face clear.
"I cannot imagine what would have happened if …" her voice broke and she turned her head to the side, swiping at her cheeks once more.
"There is little point in thinking of what didn't happen Lady Grantham. I was there, and Lord Grantham was very lucky. Your own instincts were very good, thinking on it now I can see where Lady Sybil received her abilities to handle difficult situations."
Cora smiled at the memory of her daughter and turned her head toward the Dr. again. "Oh no, Sybil was something else entirely."
"With all due respect My Lady, I think Lady Sybil was more like you than you allow." He smiled at her then, that comforting smile he had learned helped calm people in a crisis.
She shrugged gently, "Perhaps."
He smiled across at her once more before standing slowly. His bones were tired and it had been a long night after all.
"You should rest easy Lady Grantham, he should be perfectly well now. I could call up to the house for you and you could come back in the morning."
"Thank you Dr Clarkson, but I will stay here."
He smiled gently before turning to leave. "But I do thank you, so very very much."
He inclined his head to her and left the room silently.
Cora turned her attention back toward her husband. Her strong, healthy, athletic husband who had been laid low by such a horrible attack. She stoked his forehead once more.
"I have loved you very very much as well my darling."
She felt her back first. The unusual spasm of discomfort that she never usually felt upon waking. Followed by an odd tingling in one arm. Then there was the faint murmuring of voices causing her to blink herself awake and lift her head. The heaviness of that movement surprised her until she realized Robert's hand had been resting on her head. Her head, laying on one arm on the bed beside her husband, her body bent over, half on the bed and half in the chair, her other arm spread protectively across his chest.
"Thank you nurse." Mary's voice said softly.
Cora lifted her head up and blinked quickly to wake herself. Mary was sitting across from her dressed in a simple morning dress speaking to a nurse who was leaving the room. Between them Robert lay, eyes open, pale but breathing and looking at her as his hand reached in her direction.
"Robert" she breathed. He managed a weak smile and she felt the tears instantly well in her newly woken eyes. Clasping his outstretched hand in both of hers she bought his palm to her lips and kissed it gently before biting her lip to hold back the tears.
"Oh thank God." She managed quietly.
He cupped her cheek tenderly with his palm and she leaned against it.
"Oh my darling." She whispered as she felt several tears make their way down her cheeks.
"I shall be alright my love." His voice was croaky and rough, but he had spoken. He was alive and awake and nothing in the world seemed to matter apart from that.
"The Dr. was just in and says his bandages look fine, and the nurse has given him something for the pain." Mary interrupted with a shake of her head, looking somewhere between blissfully happy and uncomfortable at the same time.
"How do you feel darling?" Cora managed as she wiped her tears away with her fingertips and caught Robert's hand from her cheek and cradled it between her own.
"Not my finest, but I shall survive."
"I was so afraid Robert, I …" Cora began before stopping as Mary stood.
"I promised Baxter I would let her know when she could bring you some things. I shall ring up to the house now." She quietly left the room pulling the door closed behind her.
"Robert I …" the tears she had been holding back all seemed to find their way down her cheeks and she choked on her words.
"Now now." Robert said softly, "There is no need for all of that."
Cora reached out and placed her hand against his cheek before leaning forward and gingerly placing a kiss to his lips. She sat back up, brushing her tears away once more, trying to catch her breath.
"I thought … I was so afraid darling that I had lost you and I just couldn't …" she placed a tender hand against his chest, feeling the rise and fall of it, proof of his life. "I … I should have told you last night."
"Told me what Cora?" his hand covered hers settled against his chest.
"That I have loved you … very very much." She said tenderly, "I always have."
"I know that my darling … I could never have doubted as much." He said softly, a tear finding its way down his cheek.