The Secret life of Lily Evans.
It was late at night one autumn day and a teenage girl was settling down by the fire. The dying embers made her hair glow auburn and a flash of light caught her bright green eyes. She thoughtfully sucked on the nib of her quill as she settled down to write. Unknown to her someone was watching.
Dear diary.
I disgust me. I can't believe I just used the phrase dear diary! Excuse me while I go throw up. Apperently, diary writing is a big thing over there! Yeah, and flobberworms are a big thing over here. Fool. Well, let me get started with a little bit about myself. (I apologize for the cheesiness of this diary. There is no possible way to make a diary cool. Unless....with a bit of bottles...some fabric and a bit of imagination...Sorry. I will keep my geekish thoughts to myself.)
Well. Now. I'll just...describe my day, shall I? I woke up at five to go for my morning run. Or, morning dance as it usually turns out to be. I can't help it! I love Musicals! No one else seems to understand when I spontaneously burst into song, and it always happens to be around someone cool. Like one time, I was in the library, and it was just such a beautiful day, you couldn't blame me for standing on the table and singing "The hills are alive with the sound of music!" You would do the same, right? Well, according to the librarian, no. So now I'm barred. And the marauderers were there, and every time they see me, one of them remarks "I feel a song coming on..." Ha. Hahahaha. Not.
Maybe I should explain who the marauderers are. Well, there is Remus Lupin, who, you know, could actually be a nice guy. IF HE EVER DECIDED TO SPEAK! Hogwarts has been getting the silent treatment for years now...then there is Peter Pettigrew. Let's move swiftly on, shall we? Next comes Sirius black, the antithesis of his name. He is always joking and kidding, that burnin' hunk of manly love, and he looks like he would be quite good in the sack...if I swung that way. And last, but not least, (or maybe least, if the stories are true. He's rumored not to be very well endowed...) James Potter. I hate that guy. Ever since he walked in on me and my friend Sarah experimenting, he wont let me live it down! He keeps asking me out, when he knows I'm not interested, just so I will have to explain to people why I cant go out with him. How vindictive can you get? I maintain he is jealous of my good looks...why be a pigeon when you can be a flamingo?
I should probably explain about Sarah. She confessed to me in second year that she was on the lesbian side of bi, and to her surprise, I confessed too. Both of us had been afraid of the others reactions, but as it happens, we now have the perfect arrangement. Friends with privileges. Life is good. There aren't a lot of lesbians in Hogwarts, which is weird for a school its size, but Sarah and I are quite happy with our situation. It means I don't have the hassle of "talking about my feelings" all the time, but I still get some regular action. SCORE! Sarah is pretty great though. She's "vertically challenged", which is her way of saying short, and has hair that I would kill for. In fact, Ialmost have....kidding.
Back to the run. Well I was dancing along when all of a sudden I saw a stag. What a stag doing up at five o clock in the morning you might ask? Well I did. "What's a stag doing up at five o clock in the morning?" I asked. Surprisingly, the stag did not reply, but it did come closer so that I could pet it. It was so soft! I stroked its nose for a while and then challenged it to a race. As you do. (What? It was five in the morning and I was bored!) The Stag won. Crap. We strolled down to the lake after that, I have to say it was a very intelligent stag, and a great listener. But as the sun rose it bolted. Odd. What is also odd is that I was talking to a stag. I scare me. I grabbed a slice of toast from the kitchens and as I was leaving I bumped into Potter. James Potter. Oh no! Now that makes him sound cool! "Out of the way, dyke." Ooooh, original. Let me guess, I'm fat too? Would it be that hard to pretend I wasn't there? Eh, no. I accidentally stuck out my leg and continued on my merry way. No such luck. He grabbed my ankle and brought me down to his lowly depths with him. I, hem, landed on top of him. Uncomfortable, but judging from the bulge in his trousers, not for him. "Is that a scroll in your toga or are you just happy to see me?" He blushed as red as a tomato and let me go, but as I turned the corner, I caught him looking at me. Weird.
The classes were pretty boring as per usual, and even the marauderers were too tired to do anything. Which begs the question, what were they doing last night if they are too tired today? I caught James looking at me weirdly a few times, and I got so freaked out I went over and asked him if there was something on my face. According to him, there is nothing but my ugly nose. Ouch. I then asked why he was staring at me, and he blushed AGAIN, although I'm not sure if it was from rage or not. I hope to God it was. But I think so, because he hexed me straight after. I now have green streaks in my hair. I quite like it; actually, I really should thank him. Nah! I actually decided to change my look. I think it was too normal and predictable, so now I have knee length hair (With green streaks), elf ears, I'm now 5 foot 3, and, but don't tell, a "curvier" body. Isn't magic great? I hope nobody notices too much, I'm not quite sure if that is allowed in school, but I do like to change my look at least once a month. Variety is the spice of life!
After classes I went up to my dorm to rock out and get ready for dinner. Sarah was there and our favorite mix cd was on. Voodoo child by Jimi Hendrix was on, and I started up the air guitar. I was doing a spectacular dive off my bed when I accidentally hit into someone. "Get out of the kitchen if you can't take the heat!" I cried before I realized who it was. Sirius black. Crud muffins. He raised one eyebrow and started to slightly head bang when he looked up as if realizing where he was and who he was with. Pity, I and Sarah needed more people for the Hogwarts Rock and roll club. We meet every Thursday and generally rock out and hold air guitar championships. I am Pleased to say that I hold the record for the most titles won. Now this could be because there are only around eight people in said club, but I like to think that it is because of my superior skill. Well, Sirius about to speak when Sarah came up to me and put her arm around my waist. She kissed my cheek and said "Now, what were we talking about?" Sirius' eyes widened and he replied "James asked me to come up here and asked you why you wouldn't go out with him, but I guess I know now so I'll just have to...emmm...go. Now." He backed away and ran down the stairs. Sarah and I collapsed in hysterical laughter. "Did I do good?" She asked jokingly? "Wonderfully." I answered. We went back to our head banging ways.
Later, while I was doing homework in the common room, I caught Sirius black looking at me wit ha goofy smile. I could almost see what he was picturing and it was quite x-rated. I finally had enough and walked over. "Potter," I drawled, my voice wickedly sweet, "May I talk to you, outside?" He got up graded my elbow and pulled me away. When we were outside the portrait hole he turned to face me. "What, Evans?" he snapped. I slunk up to him and walked around him looking him up and down. "Mmm, mmm, mmm. Well, you have filled out nicely. Now what's all this about Sirius?" I asked while pressing up against him and looking up through my eyelashes. "Well, you can just tell Sirius that I swing both ways. You won't forget, will you?" I purred and ran my finger down his spine to under his belly button, which I began to circle. All of a sudden I walked off towards our common room. "And Jamsie? Close your mouth, you'll catch flies."
Alright, so I know that it was evil. And I know that It will make things worse in the long run, but it was worth it.
Lily "the greatest" Evans.
The red head close her book and slipped up the winding staircase. The boy was still watching. His eyes narrowed.
(AN) Alright, so it's not that good. It was my first story!