Title: Just Passing By
Fandom: Hellraiser
Disclaimer: I do not own Hellraiser (though I wish I did)! I only own what you don't recognize
Characters: Pinhead and…well, Pinhead
Continuity: Again set at just some random point in the Hellraiser universe
Warnings: None
Summary: On his walk Pinhead runs into, well, himself
Author's Note: Just a humorous little one-shot. Enjoy!
Pinhead was walking through the vast, grey expanses that made up the bulk of the geography here in Hell. One moment he was walking along, the next he had run into something. He looked up and realized he had run into someone, not something. It was a Cenobite he didn't recognize. The two looked at each other. They were virtually identical, save that the other Cenobite was adorned with jeweled pins and wore a robe, not the leather outfit that Pinhead did.
"Who are you?" asked Pinhead, slightly suspiciously.
"I'm part of the Order of the Gash." Said the jeweled Cenobite.
"I don't recognize you. I know all the members of the Order."
"That's because I'm from the book."
"Oh. Well, I'm from the movie."
"Hmm. So you're what they made of me." Said the jeweled Cenobite. Pinhead replied
"I guess so." Then he looked over the jeweled Cenobite more carefully.
"Nice pins." He said, rather grudgingly. The jeweled Cenobite reached up and touched one of the pins.
"Oh, you think so? I had to choose between ruby and sapphire stones. I went with sapphire." The Cenobite's voice was light and breathy, like the voice of an excited girl, while Pinhead's was so iconically deep and authoritative.
"So what are you doing out here?" asked Pinhead.
"Oh, I was just taking a little break. Wandering around inside an author's head providing inspiration isn't the most relaxing job in the world."
"I know what you mean," said Pinhead, "being a cult icon with thousands of fans scrutinizing your every move doesn't exactly make for stress-free living either." The jeweled Cenobite sighed.
"Well, that's what we get for being one of the most popular horror characters of all time."
"Hey," said Pinhead, "Clive Barker directed Hellraiser, so how come you got the nice pins and I didn't?"
"Maybe they thought you would look less evil with jeweled pins."
"Hmm, that does make sense." Pinhead admitted. Then he asked
"So, do you have a name?" the jeweled Cenobite rolled his eyes and said
"Do you know how many people ask me that? No, I don't have a name." Pinhead asked
"Why not?" the jeweled Cenobite shrugged. He said
"I guess Clive wanted to leave it up to the reader's imagination. You?"
"Sort of," answered Pinhead. "I don't have a name in the credits, but the fans call me Pinhead. At this point, so does everyone else."
"Cool." Said the jeweled Cenobite. He looked around.
"So who's in charge around here?" he asked.
"I am. Well, there's Leviathan, but I do all the day-to-day stuff." The jeweled Cenobite pouted.
"That's not fair," he stated. "You have a better job than me. And I'm the original."
"Well, if you're not the High Priest, than what do you do?" asked Pinhead.
"I'm second in command. The whole damn book and I only get one line."
"I know how that goes." Said Pinhead. "In a 90 minute film I have only 7 1/2 minutes of screentime. Though I did get all the good lines." He finished thoughtfully. The jeweled Cenobite continued to pout.
"I know," he said. "I've heard them." Then he sighed. He said
"I'd better be getting back. I have a date with Clive's muse." Pinhead frowned.
"I thought you were his muse."
"No," replied the jeweled Cenobite, "I'm his inspiration. His muse is a Greek goddess. She finally agreed to go out with me, and I don't want to show up late." Now Pinhead pouted.
"Now that's unfair. I haven't been on a date in ages. Instead, I have a slew of teenage girls coming up with weird fantasies about me." The jeweled Cenobite smiled. All he said was
"Ha." Pinhead pouted a little more.
"I guess I should be going too." He said. "The four of us are going to go out for a few drinks later."
"Sounds like fun." Said the jeweled Cenobite. "I'll see you later then."
"Yeah, probably. Hell is really smaller than it looks." The jeweled Cenobite gave a little laugh and a wave. Then they both continued on their way and, well, you know what happens next.