"I Am Captain Dobey's Phone"
By: CapLovesGregandJames
A/N: I have no idea where this came from! It just hit me and I had to write it. There may be a missing scene weaved in here too with relation to "The Plague."
Starsky and Hutch aren't mine. If they were, I'd been married to the Curly Headed one at age twelve!
I am Captain Dobey's Phone. I sit on his desk to his left side. I am available to him at all times. I mind my business when I'm not in use. I try my best to always work for him. For some strange reason, he seems to really have a major love-hate relationship with me. Lots of times, he seems to forget that I am the only method of his communications in his office.
I am not the cause of his aggravation or anger. Well, most of the time I'm not. Like a typical piece of office equipment, I do have my moments of malfunction. And sometimes that is when I am abused the most. And it's not funny either. We're not talking about a man with a gentle touch. The Captain has rather large paws and when he picks up or replaces my receiver, I never know how it's going to feel. If I had eyes, some days I am convinced I would see stars!
It seems the sources of his aggravation run the spectrum from people on the other end not getting information to him fast enough, sometimes dialing a wrong extension, his two main detectives, Starsky and Hutch, sometimes when there is no information to be found, he really blows a gasket and I'm the one to take his fury.
He slams my receiver and oh man! My cradle hurts and it hurts big time. And the things I hear him say! I of course cannot repeat what I hear; it's an unspoken thing between the two of us.
I remember this one time when Hutch was close to death from some kind of plague or another. Captain was one heaping, massive ball of total frustration. He was getting pressured from all sides to do some kind of plea for Hutch's life on TV I think it was and when he was alone in the office for a few minutes, he really let his fury loose!
He kicked the filing cabinet, threw books on the floor then he picked me up and threw me into the wall! I hit it at a fairly good clip too. Somehow, I managed to come out of it unscathed. My receiver got chipped but I still worked really well. After he was done, he picked up the office and me and got things back in order. That's really the only time though he was actually that out of control. Shew!
I consider myself fortunate though because I have been tough enough to take it. Most days aren't all that bad with him. But some days are and I have come to accept it as part of the job. Better him beat me up versus and human and I really don't want to go there!
I am Captain Dobey's Phone…
End