Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer. I am Hannah. If I was Stephenie Meyer d'you really think I'd be writing fanfics? I'd be out buying shoes with my truckloads of money.
The unfortunate tale of a Vampire named Emmett who spent his whole life in mental darkness until he was thrust too suddenly into the real world where he was totally and utterly corrupted by what he saw.
Emmett: (gasp) it all becomes clear now! It is as if my whole life I had been stood in front of a metaphorical window with the drapes pulled across it and my breath misting up the glass when suddenly an elderly, but thoughtful, relative pulled up the blinds and wiped away the condensation and the whole vast expanse of everything was suddenly apparent to me. I see the hills past the garden fence with the lambs frisking and frolicking near their mothers, and in the field beyond that the sweet little rabbits darting in and out of their warr- wait a moment, what are those two rabbits doing? Are the wrestling? Oh! Oh! Sweet Mary mother of- Oh my- my innocence I can feel it slipping away. NOOOOOOOOOO!
Narrator: So Emmett protected his innocent mind the only way he could... (Ominous voice)He became a dumbass.
A/N: This wasn't originally about Emmett. It used to be about a boy named Jim. I changed it so I could put it on here. My fellow iantotarquinemmettp-dizzle friends liked it but maybe they were just being nice. For those of you who couldn't figure it out by yourselves, the bunnies were obviously just wrestling. Violence can be very shocking to the innocent mind. You weren't thinking anything else, were you? Minds out of the gutter, people. Just kidding. If you don't know what they were really doing then I'm not going to tell you. Go ask you parents. Long A/N. I ramble too much. TTFN.