Twist Of Fate

An Until Dawn Fanfiction

Synopsis: As Dr. Samantha Jensen sat across from her newest client, Elliot Roth, she couldn't focus on anything other than the fact that he could have been Josh's twin. He even has the same eyes. But, it couldn't have been Josh. She went to his funeral 10 years ago.

Genre: Romance/Drama

Ending: All Survive

Rating: T/M - Starting this at T, might move up the the story calls for it.

Character Pairings: [Sam, Josh]

A/N: This is a collaborative fic written over the last few weeks by Enula and Mogitz. Hope you enjoy! JAM fic!

Prologue:

The New "New Reality"

After everything that had happened, you would have thought they were going to suffer indefinitely from the events that took place that night; human nature and post traumatic stress texts would have you expect nothing less…

…But you'd be surprised at the healing power of money and all that it could accomplish.

The Washingtons didn't even hesitate, didn't let the occurrence turn into even the slightest blurb on the evening news. Before the seven survivors had even left Blackwood Hospital, a lawyer was already there with his alligator-skin boots and slicked back hair, offering them all compensation for the "pain and suffering" they'd endured at the hands of their sick son.

"Bob and Melinda really think that we're so easily bought?" Chris spat indignantly – it was an especially hard blow to him, considering he'd known the Washingtons since he was eight and they were practically like a second set of parents to him. He clutched Ashley tightly to his side. There was no way he was going to be letting her go again. "Don't they have any idea what we just went through?" he added, gesturing at their battered faces. But before he could throw the check back at the lawyer, his eyes flickered down to all of the zeros… $250,000 each was hardly anything to wave their hands at.

"Whoa," Ashley breathed, trying not to sound too impressed but unfortunately, with the smug smile faintly appearing on the lawyer's face, she knew she hadn't been successful. Chris shot her a quick look, as if to warn her not to look too eager, so she folded her lips and continued to stare down at the number.

Then, the bigger picture started to come into view; student loans, no financial worries for a little while, just long enough to take some valuable time off… to heal.

Still, Chris swallowed hard. His eyes trailed to the tired and worn faces of his friends – all seemingly accepting of their cut. All with the exception of Sam. Her eyes stared intensely back at Chris, and as though they could telepathically communicate, he heard the words echoing in his mind.

Hush money.

"The Washingtons are very adamant that you are all taken care of so that we can settle this indiscretion as quickly and effectively as possible. They are more than willing to negotiate, given the circumstances, so long as we keep this as private as possible," he said. What he meant was that the Washingtons were willing to fork out over 1.75 million dollars to sweep this little mishap under the rug and ensure that none of them were going to sell their story to TMZ or Oprah. "Of course, you'll need to sign these confidentiality agreements; it's just a precaution, you understand."

"Where do I sign?" Emily asked instantaneously, visions of boots and high-end couture dancing in her head, no doubt. And like dominoes, Chris, Sam and Ashley watched as each one of them fell in line to get their own confidentiality agreement. It was their silver lining to the worst night of their lives. Ashley turned to Chris, her eyes pleading, slightly guilty.

"I mean…with this, I could take some time off and finish my book…" she started to mumble quietly, trying to justify her decision, but Chris just pulled her in for an embrace, pressing a kiss into her hair, his way of telling her that it was okay; he understood. Ashley pulled away before she turned to get in line with the others, as did Chris. Feeling eyes upon him, he paused, glancing over at Sam, who hadn't moved a muscle.

"I could pay back my student loans and… I would be able to afford my tuition out of pocket…" Chris began to rationalize as well. He had more reasons: his broken down car and his mounting debt… anything to distract him from the aching in his chest when he reflected on the fact that he'd just lost his best friend. He sighed, his shoulders slumping a bit as he looked down at the check, and then back at Sam. "We could take this time to properly grieve…"

"It's not gonna bring him back," Sam said, and Chris tried not to notice the tears in her eyes, dangerously close to spilling over.

"I know," Chris croaked, his own eyes beginning to mist over as well. Then he thought of everything that they'd gone through, including everything Josh had put them through… and yet here he was, feeling guilty for wanting to take the money and never think of any of it again. "But not taking the money isn't going to bring him back, either, Sam."

The Funeral - February 23rd 2016

It wasn't Mount Washington, anymore.

Bob quickly and quietly sold the mountain to a ski resort management company, then retired only weeks after Josh's memorial service; a closed casket. They said there was nothing in that coffin that anyone would want to see. She wished they'd changed their mind - whatever he looked like in there couldn't have been worse than what she had been imagining in her own mind.

Bob and Melinda never said how he died – just that they'd recovered his body a few days later in the mines – but the rest of them knew.

'What an awful way to go.'

It wasn't just Josh's memorial, either. The three siblings were buried side by side, although Sam knew that Beth and Hannah had nothing to bury.

"What's the point of a casket if there's nothing inside?" Mike murmured quietly to Sam, who simply responded with a quick 'shush' as the minister spoke. Sam's eyes honed in on the large photograph of Josh, propped up by an easel, in the front of the room. It was so unnerving, saying goodbye to a photograph. Felt so… unfinished.

Bob and Melinda had asked Sam to say a few words, having practically been like another daughter to them all these years… but how? How does one go up in front of a huge group of mourners and say goodbye to people who didn't even feel gone? She'd had the time to mourn for Hannah and Beth; the whole year they'd been missing had really helped her move on and finding out the truth as to of what happened to them felt like closure. She'd miss them, but at least she knew. She saw.

But… Sam couldn't even begin to think about how she was going to say goodbye to Josh. He was her best friend. Her person. Even during the times in her life where she wondered if she and Hannah still had anything in common or feared they were growing apart, she couldn't ever imagine not having them in her life. She was her direct line to Josh. And now they were all gone.

Chris nudged Sam, her eyes tiredly flitting up to his face.

"You're on," he whispered, his eyes wet and swollen from crying. Ashley leaned over him and gave Sam's arm a gentle squeeze, a little bit of silent encouragement - her nose was red, her own cheeks tearstreaked as well. Sam nodded vacantly and stood in a daze, her crinkled notes in her hand. Everyone was silent, and Sam felt nervous under all their tearful stares as she slowly walked up towards the podium. As she passed the photograph of Josh, his eyes seemed to follow her. She let her fingertips trail across the smoothness of the print and along his face as she stepped onto the small lifted stage. Her heart was thumping in her chest and she was silently wondering how she was going to get through this speech without breaking down. She clenched her jaw, swallowing down the lump in her throat as she stared out at everyone, familiar and new faces staring back at her.

She took in a staggered breath, smoothing out the wrinkled and smudged paper in front of her - it was no use. Her eyes were instantly filled with tears as she attempted to make any sense of her own words. And even now, she realized there was nothing on that paper that could fully describe the exact shape of the hole in her chest at that very moment.

"The Washington siblings always did know how to throw a party," she improvised, smiling through her tears and wiping them away quickly with a sniffle. There were quiet chuckles in the audience; it was true. The place was filled the the maximum occupancy, people even standing in the back. She bit her lip to keep from grimacing in pain in front of everyone, so much so she feared she'd bite through the skin. She crumbled up the note cards. "I'm not gonna read from this, actually. Because there are no words on paper that could ever describe what these three meant to me," her voice cracked. She brought her hand to her heart, it literally feeling like it might be breaking in her chest. "I loved them. They were my family. We had plans to grow old together and be aunts and uncles to each other's kids… this was just so unfair. Never have I met three people with more life and love to give and offer. They treated me like I was one of them and for a little while… I was."

Sam's breathing became shallow, her vision growing dark around one center point - she thought she might pass out. She hadn't been able to eat, hadn't been able to sleep since it happened. She leaned on the podium for support.

"I always had a crush on Josh, you know," she confessed. She gave a small roll of a shoulder. "Oh who am I kidding, I think everyone knew that," she said low, into the microphone.

"Duh!" she heard Emily chime from the third pew, a caring smile on her face. The congregation chuckled again. Sam loved that even through the tears, they were finding ways to laugh. Josh would have loved that.

"If you didn't know before, you should know now," she said, her eyes finding Bob and Melinda in the front row. "I loved your son… so much," her voice cracked, the tears falling freely now. She sniffled again, looking towards the ceiling as she wiped her tears away - a useless gesture as more tears just replaced them. "Josh and I had this plan that if we weren't married by the time we were 30, we'd just marry each other. I am not sure who was getting the shorter end of the stick in that plan but…" her words trailed off as she recounted the memory in her head, still so vivid. Like it was yesterday. "I couldn't wait for 30 to come. I was gonna be a real Washington, like on paper and everything-" her voice hitched and she covered her hand over her mouth to keep a sob from escaping her lips as she processed the words that were coming out; that dream was dead. It was never going to happen.

Sam buckled over suddenly, her core giving out as the sob fell from her throat anyways. She had tried too hard to keep this from happening, to keep from falling apart in front of everyone. But there, in that moment, Sam was inconsolable. She rested her head on her arms across the top of the podium, trying desperately to get it together as she wept and wept. It didn't last as long as it felt, however, and she felt a hand resting on her back, and she turned to see Chris right next to her, comforting her and taking over the microphone to finish what Sam couldn't.

"Clearly, Josh touched a lot of lives." He turned back towards the picture of him, folding his lips to keep himself from breaking like Sam before him. She stood upright, the two of them leaning on each other, his arm draped protectively over her shoulders. One way or another, they were going to get through this moment. "They all did. And I never thought I'd be up here, speaking at my best friend's funeral. Life's just… pretty messed up sometimes, I guess. And I can't even begin to tell you how much we are going to miss him. Even though he battled the most, even though he had his struggles, he shined brighter than anyone I've ever met. He was the saddest person I ever knew… but he made us all laugh the hardest. His heart, his compassion, his dark, really weird sense of humor… the world is a sadder place without him in it," Chris said, and Sam admired his strength and bravery… she was grateful that he'd come to her side to say all of this. She gave him a weak, appreciative smile.

"And look… I'm not gonna pretend like he didn't lose his way there for awhile. But he was my brother. And nothing will ever change that," he promised, swallowing down his own grief, his nostrils flaring as he attempted not to lose it, himself. "And he loved you." As Chris said those words, he looked back down at Sam, and in her heart she felt like he was talking just to her. For a moment, just a split second, her heart felt a little bit lighter. "And he loved music. Especially this song-" he cued, and just as Sam had planned, Highway To Hell by AC/DC began blaring over the loudspeaker.

"-And he specifically asked for it to be played at his funeral," Sam added, and the entire congregation broke out into laughter. Her heart warmed as she realized that it got exactly the reaction Josh had said it would when he made her promise one day - if he died and she had any control over it - he wanted this song to be played. She thought it was a little bit morbid, but it was so darkly and perfectly Josh, she couldn't stop herself from fulfilling his wishes.

Sam watched from the stage as the chapel began to filter out, the crowd thinning as everyone departed for the wake, which was to be held at the Washington estates. Sam had her own reservations about going to their house - she was afraid that if the funeral didn't kill her, the memories certainly would.

Even still, knowing that her friends would be there beside her, she found the strength to go.

All the rest of the evening, she'd tried to get a chance to talk to Bob and Melinda, but every time she approached them they were elusive, getting ushered away or talked to by another mourner. After trailing them for the better half of the night, she'd finally given up, walking down the familiar halls of their sprawling house in a fog, unable to bring herself to grasp that they were all really gone.

On autopilot, she rounded a corner, instantly plagued with memories of herself doing the same thing so many times before. In some of the visions she was running around the corner as fast as she could, evading Josh who was hot on her trail to tackle her to the ground for some silly prank she and his sisters had just pulled on him. In other memories, she was rounding the corner with her arms full of snacks to take back to Hannah's room and devour with them in the wee hours of morning.

Every time, however, her eyes would instinctively pull to his bedroom door, the one she had to pass to get to Hannah's, on the right side of the hallway. It was a cool kid's door: band flyers taped all over it and a keep out sign. There was also a stolen "J" from the "Jiggle's Tavern" (topless juice bar) sign on the other side of town that he 'didn't have anything to do with'.

Sometimes, the door was ajar with some obscure, alternative rock band's music spilling out into the hallway (he always had the best taste in music - she had dozens of mix cd's he'd made her over the years to vouch for that. 'It's just this cool band I kinda thought you'd dig…' he'd say). Sometimes, it was closed, the yellow light peeking out from under his door to let her know he was still awake, probably playing video games or reading - Josh actually used to read a lot.

One time it was wide open and he was changing and she couldn't help but stare in with wide eyes and wonderment as she passed by; she was 15 and she'd never really seen a half-naked boy before. And of course, it was at that very moment that he happened to turn around and catch her, a huge grin stretching across his lips.

"Samantha Jensen, you are a total creeper!" he teased, still not bothering to put a shirt on. Sam's cheeks went scarlet as she bowed her head and hurried towards Hannah's room. "Don't be so shy, sweetie! We're just mammals, it's natural!" he called after her, knowing fully well that she was mortified. She laughed anyway, calling over her shoulder,

"Close your door, Josh! No one wants to see that!"

"Apparently you do," he called back before she heard the door latch shut.

This time, when she turned the corner and saw his bedroom door slightly ajar at the end of the hall, it was so quiet. So dark and lifeless - how fitting. It physically pained her, and against her better judgement, she found herself standing at the door and pushing it open, letting it swing slowly on its hinges.

She's been in here a multitude of times, for various reasons… but it felt so wrong to be in here now. It wasn't his room anymore… it wasn't anyone's room. She wondered to herself just how someone who'd always been so full of life could be gone, just snuffed out, and this tomb was the only proof he existed in the world.

Soon it would all be boxed up, given away. Somewhere, some other cool dude would find his computer as a steal at a Goodwill and some other kid would inherit his book collection with his notes handwritten on the sides of the pages. The thought of that made Sam sick to her stomach. She walked through his room, her fingers lightly grazing over this and that, just letting herself remember the way he smelled and the way it felt in here - surely she'd never be in this room again. Maybe not even in this house.

She sat in his computer chair, leaning back a bit, thumbing through his drawings and his sketches, realizing now that many of them were preparation for the night on the mountain, which was the last way she wanted to remember her kind-hearted, best-friend's-dreamy-but-dopey big brother.

As she flipped through the pages, about to set it down and move on, she happened across some of his handwriting and her eyes drank in the words quickly, especially after seeing her name etched across the top of the page.

sam-

probably goes without saying that ive been a little weird lately. sorry about that and sorry for pushing you away when i know you just wanna help but… i dunno its just when i see you now all i can think about are my sisters and i hate that. i especially hate it because i dont have any control over myself lately - i feel like im going a little crazy and i just need you not to see me like this all the time. i hate it because ive pretty much been in love with you since i was 13 years old.

The last line was crossed out, but Sam could still see it clearly, even through her now-free-falling tears, landing on the page with a splat and dousing the paper. There was more, about how much she meant to him and how angry he still felt but didn't blame her for any of it. She still wondered, every day, why he chose to hurt her with the rest of them. Had he forgotten? Had he forgotten how much they had meant to one another? How could he have ever thought she didn't feel the same way as him?

"I kinda thought I'd find you in here," Chris said from the doorway, and Sam didn't even bother to wipe her tears away. She glanced back down at the note.

"There's a note in here," she sniffed. "For me." She raised her head and faced Chris, the saddest smile crossing her lips. "It says he loved me," her voice cracked. Chris offered her back a weak smile in return.

"I think… we all kinda thought you knew…" he admitted.

"I did," Sam nodded. Chris walked in, taking a seat on Josh's bed across from Sam. He awkwardly tried to put his hand on her leg, but both realized how weird it was and he removed it with a slight chuckle.

"I'm sorry, I'm not very good at these things."

"You're better at it than you think," she assured, taking in a ragged breath. She looked up towards the ceiling with an exhale. "How is this real life?"

"New reality, right Sam?" Chris quoted. Apparently Josh's words were still prominent in Chris' mind as well.

"How are you doing?" Sam asked, genuine concern washing over her for Josh's best friend. Chris gave a shrug, his face falling.

"Doesn't seem real yet. Kinda expecting this to be part two of the worst prank in existence." Sam could completely agree, always waiting for him to jump out of a closet and yell, 'gotcha!' Chris sighed. "You?" Merely contemplating the answer to that question had Sam's eyes tearing again. She opened her mouth to respond before snapping it closed in a hard line, shaking her head.

"I don't even know how to begin to answer that question," she said so quietly, her voice uneven. She sniffed. "He was my…" she paused. What was he to her? Her best friend? Her adoptive big bro? Her biggest crush? Her… "...everything," she finally decided on after a long moment. Sam began to weep, and Chris offered her a brief, sideways hug because physical contact with a girl (especially one who wasn't Ashley) was never really his strong suit. "I just thought that he was gonna pull through, you know? He was having a tough time but I thought he just needed some time. And then we were gonna go off to college and get married and he'd be a psychologist and I'd be a veterinarian. We'd have two kids, a boy and a girl-"

"Wow, you really thought all this through, didn't you?" Chris laughed. Sam smirked a bit through the tears. "He knew all that, Sam. He knew how you felt about him."

"Did he?" she asked, wrapping her arms around herself and leaning back in her chair. "Because I'm not so sure about that anymore." Chris leaned in.

"Sam. I promise. He knew." And Sam could see from the look in his eyes that he was telling the truth. Maybe one day, far off in the future (if her heart could handle it), she and Chris could meet up and reminisce and he could tell her just how he knew. But for now, she was content with taking his word for it. Sam took in another deep breath, ignoring the fact that it literally hurt to breathe from all of the crying.

"Maybe I'll be a psychologist," she pitched. "Save some other Joshes in the world."

The next day, Sam switched her major.

Time moved on, as it has a way of doing, and with it went the memories of that night. Full recollections had broken off into fragments, little snippets that would pop up here and there like bouts of déjà vu. They'd bump into each other from time to time, making idle chitchat and blatantly ignoring the incessant pulling to ask each other the questions that still nagged at them; all the loose ends.

Yes, money had a therapeutic effect on helping them forget that night on Mount Washington.

But no amount of money would let Sam forget about Josh. Not really.

...That's why she never took it.

To Be Continued...