The Elric Brothers Guest Host RAW
By: DMEX
Nothing is mine
-RAW Locker Room-
Ted DiBiase Jr. and Maryse walk in and see Edward Elric with someone in a suit of armor
Ted: Who are you and what the hell are you doing in our Locker Room?
Ed: I'm Ed and this is my brother Al. You heard of us? We're guest hosting RAW tonight.
Maryse: (speaks French)
Ed: Speak up!
Ted: She said: "You're too damn short to be in the same room as us!"
Ed (angry): I DARE YOU TO CALL ME SHORT AGAIN! SEE WHAT HAPPENS!
Al: Brother. Easy.
Maryse: (speaks French)
Ed: Can't you speak ANY English?
Al: Brother, don't cause any more trouble.
Maryse: You heard the tin man. Get lost.
(Ted DiBiase Jr. hands Ed a $100.00 bill)
Ted: Get something to make you grow a few inches.
Ed (angry): I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!
Ted: Is that a challenge?
Ed: You and me later tonight, in a Extreme Rules match. Everything goes even alchemy!
Maryse: (speaks French)
Ed (angry, to Maryse): I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE! JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!
Maryse French TKOs his ass
Al: Are you okay?
Ed: Do I look okay Al? The nerve of that Brittney Spears wannabe and that millionaire boyfriend of hers.
Maryse: What was that!
(Maryse is glaring at the Elric bros. angrily in Anime Style)
Al: Don't look at me! I didn't say anything!
Ed: Oh thanks a lot Al!
(cartoon violence sounds are heard outside. Ed comes out battered. Randy Orton just happened to walking by)
Randy: …
Ed: Way to help out back there Al.
Al: You brought that upon yourself…
Randy: You the guest hosts tonight.
Ed: And who the hell are you?
Randy: Randy Orton that's who!
Ed: What can we do for you?
Randy: I want a match against Edge!
Ed: Edge? Next you want me to go square dancing with Hornswoggle!
(Hornswoggle is in his square dancing gear standing next to Al)
Al: Sorry, Hornswoggle…
Hornswoggle: (groans and walks away)
Randy: I said: "I want a match against Edge!"
Al: If that's what you want…
Randy: So we have an understanding…?
Ed: If that's you want to call it…
*: You think you can handle me?
(Edge comes in)
Ed: You Edge?
Edge: And you're short! Shorter than Hornswoggle!
Ed (angry): I'M NOT SHORT! I DARE YOU TO CALL ME THAT AGAIN!
-RAW Ring-
Justin Roberts: Please welcome your guest hosts for Monday Night RAW, Edward and Alphonse Elric; THE FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST!
(FMA music (English Season 1) blares, some cheers and boos)
Ed: What's up Tampa?
(Crowd cheers and boos)
Ed: I'm not like on ACW!
(Undertaker's music blares)
King: What's the Undertaker doing here?
Cole: You got me.
Undertaker (bellows): Which one of you is Edward Elric!
Ed (scared): That'd… be me…
Glares at Al who's quaking in his armor, Ed is about to pee his pants
Undertaker: Then you are his brother?
Al: Yes…
Undertaker: I take one at you boys and I already know what you did! You committed the ultimate sin, even among alchemists. Both of you attempted HUMAN TRANSMUTATION!
King: What the hell?
Cole: Wait, what?
Ed and Al are the size of chibis while Undertaker is viciously glaring at them (like on Teen Titans)
Undertaker: If I find out that both of you tried Human Transmutation again, WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A PROBLEM! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
Ed and Al shake their heads yes, you hear a rattle sound out of them
Undertaker: Good!
(Undertaker leaves as his music blares and Ed and Al are still shaking in fear)
-Later-
Al is with the Bella Twins and Edward Elric gets beat to a pulp by Maryse and DiBiase Jr.
Ed: Don't ask…
(passes out)
Brie Bella: That's your brother?
Al: Yes.
Nikki Bella: He's so…
Al (thinking): Don't say short…! Don't say short…!
Bella Twins: CYYYUUUUTTTE!
Al falls backwards Anime style. The Bella Twins take Ed with them and nurse him back to good health. After some mishaps involving Hornswoggle, it was a good RAW
-3 days later, Military Base-
Col. Mustang: Heard you boys and Taker had a run in…
Ed: I could have taken him.
Col. Mustang: And I heard you got beat up by a Diva.
Ed (depressed): Don't remind me… I still have bruises from her TKO…
The Military base roared into laughter when everyone heard about Ed's mishap with Maryse.
Ed (angry): SHUT THE HELL UP!
End?