!WARNING!-CONTAINS ALCOHOLISM, SUICIDAL MENTIONS, INSANITY+PTSD+VARIOUS OTHER MENTAL ILLNESSES, & MENTION OF DUB-CON
Few have gone insane due to prolonged exposure to the cruciatus curse, the only known cases being Frank and Alice Longbottom, parents of Neville Longbottom, a hero of the Second Wizarding War. What many do not know is that there is a certain point under the cruciatus where a person could does not immediately descend into insanity, but without hasty treatment, it would be inevitable. Of course, there are so few cases that this is not a commonly known fact, there have been no studies on the subject of cruciatus exposure so therefore, this is not something that you would find in a book in even the restricted section of the Hogwarts library. The conditions under which the curse is inflicted, combined with being under the curse itself, can lead to post-traumatic stress disorder, which can cause victims to isolate themselves, which is never beneficial for a healthy human mind, let alone a damaged one. Falling into the dark realm of insanity is unavoidable at this point.
This is what happened to Hermione Jean Granger.
November 22nd, 1999
Hermione closed her eyes and sighed at the satisfying burn at the back of her throat as she swallowed her first gulp of firewhiskey that night. Last night she had woken to another horrible nightmare about the war, her clothes and sheets soaked in sweat. She proceeded to to polish off her last remaining bottle of firewhiskey, and more could not be delivered until, well… five minutes ago. All day she had been sporting the most bloody awful hangover but could not bring herself to go out to the shop to buy more firewhiskey, she could not risk someone seeing her and it somehow leading to a death eater on her doorstep.
'Just tell me how you got into my vault, Muddy, and I'll make it quick, yeah?'
Hermione shivered and took another large gulp straight out of the bottle. A few more and maybe her voice would stop. A few more and maybe she'd feel somewhat sane again.
'I wonder if your blood tastes as muddy as it looks.'
Hermione winced as she could almost feel Bellatrix biting her lower lip until it bled, the older witch proceeding to suck the blood into her mouth. She would never tell anyone what actually happened that day at Malfoy Manor, how she wasn't only tortured with the cruciatus curse, Bellatrix did much more than that to her. She would never tell anyone how much she liked it. She took another gulp, staring at the living room wall in front of her but at the same time staring at nothing.
'You like that, don't you, Mu-'
The voice was cut short as someone pounded on the door to her flat.
Hermione quickly jumped up off the ratty couch, eyes wide with fear. She had been fearing that this day would come, the day that rogue or escaped death eaters would come after her seeking revenge. Terrified, she picked up her wand with one trembling hand from where it lay on the coffee table and quickly hurried to the fireplace. She grabbed a handful of floo powder and prepared to throw it into the flames before a voice made her stop.
"Oi, Miss! Ya owe me rent!"
It was her landlord, not death eaters.
She quickly summoned her wallet and pulled a small stack of muggle money out of it. Cautiously approaching the door, she slid the money underneath it and put her ear up to the door, wand gripped tightly in her hand. She heard the man grunt as he bent down to pick up the cash.
"Pleasure doin' business wit ya, Miss, good day to ya."
Hermione let out a gasp of air that she didn't know she had been holding and dropped down onto her knees, her wand clattering to the floor.
She looked up at the ceiling, "When will this end?" she whispered, tears clouding her vision.
December 31st, 2000
Hermione glanced down at the bottle she'd been drinking out of all night, good, she still had a quarter of the bottle left, maybe enough to make her pass out. More fireworks sounded outside, making her jump. They sounded so much like spells, and the bursts of colorful lights peaking through her curtains didn't help either.
"Bloody New Years." she mumbled, bringing the bottle up to her mouth. Maybe if she had been sober she would have thought to put a silencing spell around the flat.
'Calm down, Muddy, there's no need to get yourself all worked up over fireworks.' Bellatrix's voice whispered in her mind. At some point in the past year the memories had evolved into a voice that she could talk to.
Hermione gritted her teeth, "Shut up, I am calm."
'No, you're shaking like a leaf and drinking enough to get a werewolf hammered.'
"I always drink." Hermione said, taking a large gulp.
'Not this much.'
She took another gulp, "Just get out of my head," Hermione said in a defeated voice, "You did this to me, you made me like this!"
'No, Muddy, you did this all to yourself. Did I make you cut Potty and Weasel out of your life and move to the filthy muggle world?'
Hermione was silent.
'Did I make you turn to the bottle for comfort?'
Hermione was silent.
'Did I make yo-'
"SHUT UP! JUST SHUT THE HELL UP!" Hermione finally screamed, hurling the bottle at the wall. Shards of glass and splashes of whiskey rained down onto the floor as she picked her wand, falling off the couch and onto her knees.
'Don't do anything stupid, Muddy, you're already poisoning your liver.'
"I said shut up!" Hermione shouted, pointing her wand at her temple and tightly shutting her eyes.
'No, Muddy, don't do that, you're not allowed to leave me here. What did I tell you that day at the manor?'
Hermione let out a sob, "You said that I belonged to you, that only you are allowed to kill me."
'Yes, my little mudpup, now throw your wand on the floor and go to sleep.'
Tears streamed down her face,"Y-Yes, Bellatrix," Her hand shook as she jerked her wand away from her head and threw it on the other side of the room, near the shards of glass. Standing on shaky legs, Hermione got back up on the stiff couch and shut her eyes, trying to will away the sounds of the fireworks.
'Good mudpup, good girl.'
Hermione smiled.
Okay, so I hope ya'll liked that. Please review and check out my other fics. Oh, and if you have any suggestions or requests for a story, message me on tumblr [me-rjb]. Thanks!