It was Elder McKinley's birthday, and they did not have a cake. Amid all the frenzy of preparations that had taken place that morning, it was the one thing the Elders had somehow utterly neglected. Elder Thomas, in particular, was devastated. For the first time since they had both arrived in Uganda, he felt like he was about to completely let down Elder McKinley as a mission companion. Elder Thomas thought he would sooner cut off a limb, or even give up Poptarts for an entire month, than do anything to disappoint Elder McKinley - that was how loyal he was.
"Elder McKinley is a reasonable person, I'm sure he'll understand," Elder Church said, attempting to raise the spirits of the others.
Elder Thomas glared at him with red, scorching eyes. "Elder McKinley is one of my best friends in the whole wide world, and he has been nothing but an amazing, hard-working, selfless leader to us all. He has been looking forward to this day all month. So if Elder McKinley wants a cake for his birthday, then Elder McKinley is getting a gosh darn cake for his birthday, do you people hear me?"
Nobody was going to argue with Elder Thomas while he was currently brandishing a rolling pin.
While the others scuttled away to search for baking supplies, Elder Thomas pulled Elder Price aside.
"Elder McKinley is going to come back any time now. Your job is to head him off and distract him, Elder Price."
"Uh, okay. Why me?"
"Because I'll be too busy, and you're his favorite."
"How am I supposed to - "
"I don't know! Just think of something!"
Elder Price sighed. He could tell there was going to be no use in protesting today.
Elder Cunningham was starting to follow his companion out the door, but Elder Neely grabbed him. "We need all hands on deck, Elder."
"But - "
"No 'buts'! Everything has to be perfect by the time Elder McKinley gets here."
Elder Price didn't actually mind having to hang out with Elder McKinley for a day. He just kind of resented those times he was treated like the bottom rung of the ladder around there, just because he was one of the newest missionaries. Okay, so he'd also had a meltdown and run out on them that one time, that didn't mean everyone could just boss him around whenever they wanted.
He spotted Elder McKinley walking up the path to the house, his arms full of what looked to be clothes and various styling products.
"Hey, Elder McKinley," he called out.
"Hello, Elder Price," the district leader responded cheerily. "This morning I woke up to find half of my belongings missing, and a note revealing clues to their locations all over the village. Isn't that strange?"
"That does seem like a pretty big inconvenience."
"Luckily I do enjoy a good scavenger hunt. I haven't been on one since I was a kid. Being an adult comes with such taxing responsibilities these days."
"Yeah, I know what you mean."
"You're blocking the door, Elder."
"Huh, so I am."
Elder McKinley gave him a knowing look. "Poptarts sent you to distract me, didn't he."
"Bingo."
"Well in that case, I have an idea for what we can do..." Elder McKinley set down his belongings in a hidden crevice between two large boulders by the doorway. He then took a hold of Elder Price's hand, an impish smile spreading across his face.
Elder Price wondered what sweet hell he had just committed himself to.
"Attention everyone, I have successfully secured a box of cake mix," Elder Michaels announced triumphantly to the room of missionaries. "I will accept your unyielding devotion and tributes now, preferably in the form of cleaning chores for the next three months."
"Oh thank you Heavenly Father," Elder Thomas said to the ceiling.
"Hey, I was the one who did most of the work here. Do you know how much trouble I had to go through to find this? No offense, Big Guy."
"Did you remember to get eggs and butter, too?"
"Of course. How stupid do you think I am?"
"How about the flour?"
Elder Michaels froze.
"Okay, hold off on the tributes for a second," he said as he ran out the door.
Well, this wasn't so bad, Elder Price thought.
"Do you want me to go lower?" he asked.
"A little lower, yes - mm-hm, right there. Now pull a bit faster."
"I'm not sure you can handle me going much faster. You're starting to get breathless."
"I've only been imagining you doing this with me for months, Elder. Trust me, I must have done this by myself over a hundred times."
Elder McKinley apparently really liked to jump-rope.
"Okay, now you have to start singing," Elder McKinley said excitedly, flapping his hands around while in mid-jump. "I know! Do 'Miss Mary Mack'."
"I am not singing."
"This is your district leader speaking, Elder Price. Hear me and obey!"
"Can I just remind you that as of today, you are twenty years old?"
"Can I just remind you that I could go back to the house right now and ruin the surprise? They'll all blame you, of course."
Elder Price sighed. He had been doing that a lot, lately.
"Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack," he chanted under his breath.
"I can't hear you, Elder!"
He never knew Elder McKinley could be such a cruel person.
"I'm pretty sure cake batter isn't supposed to foam quite like that..."
"I don't think it's supposed to look slightly green, either."
"Just how old is this cake mix, anyway?"
"Elder Thomas, are you okay?" asked Elder Church in concern. Elder Thomas was, at the moment, rocking in a fetal position in the corner of the kitchen and breathing very rapidly into a paper bag.
"I will remain calm I will remain calm I will remain calm..."
"Maybe we should have kept Elder Price here. He knows how to bake stuff, right?"
"Gee, now you think to tell us that."
"I'm sorry! Elder Price just intimidates me."
"Guys, I think the streamers are starting to fall apart," Elder Davis said, sticking his head into the kitchen.
Elder Thomas burst into tears.
"Twenty. Years. Old."
"You're such a stick-in-the-mud, Elder Price," said Elder McKinley, who was currently at work etching a hopscotch course into the dirt. "Where's your childlike spirit and sense of wonder?"
"Oh, I'm wondering something alright."
"I swear, sometimes you can be so - " Suddenly Elder McKinley caught sight of a couple children from the village peering at them from behind a tree. He waved over at them exuberantly. "Hey there! Hi! Do you want to come play with us?"
They didn't respond.
"I think you're scaring them."
"Don't listen to Mr. Grouchy Face over here. See, you just throw the rock like this, and then you just hop on over to the square - " Elder McKinley demonstrated. " - And voilà! Now you try."
One of the children, a young girl, shyly approached Elder McKinley and took the rock. She tossed it and bounded over to her square in several graceful, rabbit-like hops.
Elder McKinley clapped. "Yes, exactly! You've played this before."
"She's probably better at it than you are."
"Cut the sass, Elder Price. Oh look, now they're making it longer…"
Gradually a large assemblage of children was starting to trickle and congregate around the hopscotch course, which only seemed to grow longer and more intricate over the hours. Some of the children were even contributing their own novel variations to the game.
Elder McKinley was visibly impressed by their ingenuity. "Look at how clever that is!" he cried, pointing to one boy who was maneuvering the rock like a soccer ball.
"Okay, let me try," Elder Price said to the boy, taking the rock from him.
Elder McKinley was smiling from ear to ear.
"I never want to see another cake again," Elder Neely groaned into the table.
"At least it's finished. It'll be worth it, if Elder McKinley likes it."
"What if he doesn't like it?"
"Then we declare mutiny and overthrow him."
"I call dibs on his position."
"I can't believe you're all talking about usurping Elder McKinley on his birthday," Elder Church said. "Besides, if anyone's going to replace him, it should be me."
"You're all terrible people," Elder Thomas said from the floor.
Elder McKinley and Elder Price were sitting by the lake, dangling their legs over the edge and cooling their sore heels. For a while Elder Price wondered if Elder McKinley was going to insist on wading into the cold waters or skipping stones across the surface, but the other boy seemed content just sitting there on the lakeside as the sun started to set over the distant hills.
"I had a nice day, Elder Price. Thank you."
"Yeah...I guess it was okay." It was pretty nice after all, he meditated, just to feel like a kid again for a day, without the weight of external pressures and responsibilities. It was the kind of feeling he'd been longing to have back again for most of his life...
They didn't speak for a few minutes, just companionably enjoying the rare, uninterrupted tranquility. A few times Elder Price would catch the other boy glancing over at him as if on the verge of saying, or doing, something – but then Elder McKinley would quickly look away, and the moment would pass.
Elder Price wondered what on earth that was about.
"I guess we should start heading back now," he said, finally. "They're probably waiting for us."
"They? Oh, right...of course."
"Get this, the others have been trying to bake a cake for you all day."
"I do hope they remembered that I'm lactose intolerant," Elder McKinley mused.
"...That could potentially be a problem."
Elder McKinley laughed. "It's not a big deal. We can go to the city tomorrow and buy a new cake."
"Elder Thomas is going to be pretty upset, though. He really wanted to give you something special for your birthday."
"If that's the case, he shouldn't be too upset," Elder McKinley said thoughtfully.
"Er - what?"
"You'll know one day. Maybe." He held out his hand. "C'mon, let's go back."
"Alright then." Elder Price paused. "And if anyone asks what we did today..."
"We went on a very grown-up and manly stroll through the village."
"Glad to hear we're on the same page."