Title, "An Image says a thousand words."
author, Radar Hunnihawk,
rating, G.
summary. In response to HawkeyesMartini Challenege Number 2. BJs lost a Very important photo and a new nurse is just feeling lost. Feedback welcome. Edited thanks to HawkeyesMartini feedback.
Hawkeye watched as BJ'S stood staring. BJ'S had been standing staring at the same spot for the last ten minutes, he hadn't moved, didn't say anything. The spot in particular was where his pillow had taken residence on his bunk. The pillow in question was now in BJ'S arms and he was holding it so hard Hawkeye could see the white of BJ'S knuckles. Hawkeye also knew from experience the only times BJ'S was so still and quiet was when he was asleep or he had received unwanted news from home. BJ clearly was not asleep and it wasn't news from home. Hawkeye was certain of that because before BJ started to seemingly pretend to be a statue, he had out loud to anyone who cared to listen, his latest letter from home. Hawkeye now knew all about Erin getting her new pair of shoes and her first trip to the Mall. He had listened to BJ'S longing to have been there, even made him an extra dry martini to stop the almost inevitable flow of tears from falling. Naturally Hawkeye was now getting worried at his friend's curious behaviour. He was about to broach the subject when BJ'S mumbled something. Something that sounded like:
"It's gone."
AHA! That made things turn from as clear as the mess tent coffee to, well clear to clearer. Well as clear as things could be when one extra dry martini had turned into two, three or even four. Hawkeye really didn't know anymore. He had consumed so many martinis since he first found himself in the middle of the latest war to end all wars they, like the faces of his patients, all tended to blur into one. Hawkeye knew he shouldn't ask if he wanted to get some much needed sleep that night but he found his mouth forming "What's gone?" Unfortunately his voice box worked with his mouth in conspiring against his brains better judgment and he caught BJ'S attention.
Looks like his dreams of that new nurse, Jacobs, would be waiting a little while longer. And oh man did he have pleasant dreams about her. If only she would stick around long enough for him to talk to her. Or even sit with her, or shoot one of his famous grins in her direction. He was just going into a particularly vivid daydream of her when BJ'S voice cut in.
"IT!" was BJ'S very helpful answer. Sometimes, Hawkeye conceded, having a conversation with BJ was like getting blood out of a stone. However if he asked Margaret she would say the same thing about him.
"Right. Erm what's it Beej?"
"Photo." BJ'S appeared to be going into a state Hawkeye preferred not to see his friends going into.
"Aha. A photo. Of Erin?" Hawkeye hazarded a guess.
BJ, the pillow and the half empty martini glass that his other hand held crashed ungracefully onto the bunk. The bunk groaned in protest of its sudden intruder. After all it was rather content to just be there and support its own weight. When all is said and done, the bunk would argue , if it could communicate with humans, that it had gotten used to not supporting weight for the last 74 hours. However BJ'S feet were happy to get BJ'S bulk off them. If his feet could communicate with his bunk they would have said "You have it easy, you don't have to be encased in boots full of holes and itchy army socks. It's your turn to have the big lug's weight on you, thank you very much!" However feet don't communicate, neither do bunks so this was a pretty pointless although hopefully an amusing diversion in homage to Douglas Adams!
Anyway while feet and bunk were not communicating, BJ was. He had managed to get across to Hawkeye, after a game of Twenty Questions and another martini that the photo in question was the only one he had off the complete Hunnicutt trio. The trio being BJ'S, Peg and his precious bundle of joy he missed fiercely. Having learned this information , and consumed another glass off rat poison pretending it was some type of alcohol , Hawkeye was beginning to see why BJ was getting more angsty than all H/M theorists when they come across gasp the dreaded C/M theory. In other words he was pretty damned upset about said missing photo. Which was why when Frank came in from his weekly physical via one blond head nurse, he was confronted with the site of Hawkeye's legs appearing from under BJ'S bunk whilst BJ was scattering the contents of his foot locker across the Swamp, mainly on Frank's bunk. Hawkeye's having already been done. Frank had planned to ignore their latest activities and had just finished reading Stars and Stripes when BJ went over and started rummaging through Franks footlocker.
This in turn caused Frank to do that irritating high- pitched whine of his to a pitch that had all the neighbourhood dogs howling in response.
Meanwhile while that was going on, what the three didn't know was the location of the photograph. At the moment it was in the Mess tent. To be more precise it was in the trembling hand of a nurse who was sat unnoticed in the Mess tent. She was drinking her fourth cup of coffee, having just finished a draining shift in post op. The photo had been procured while everyone else had been in the OR or other related activities. She had sneaked in without knowing what she was doing and had taken the photograph. Now putting the photograph back would be her next problem. If she had known the Swamp residents better she would have known that she could have just walked in and handed it back with an apology. However she didn't know the Swamp residents very well, she didn't know anyone in camp very well at all and that was a lonely position to be in. She sighed as she drained her coffee and looked around. She was in the tent totally alone now, having sat there for well over an hour. "Typical!" She thought to herself.
"Well I confirm it's not under here." Hawkeye said eventually as he finally emerged from under the bunk. He had been examining every nook and cranny thoroughly, and there was not a bit of dirt or spring that he hadn't prodded and probed.
"And it's not in here." BJ responded. By this point upset wasn't in it. This was at a level comparable to Hawkeye fans if Hawkeye got sent home instead of Henry. Frank, who had come down to an audible pitch at that point made the mistake of asking:
"What's missing?"
"A photo." Was the simple answer he received.
"Of Hunnicutt, his wife and his baby? Normally kept under your pillow?" Frank answered looking at Hawkeye and BJ in turn.
"Yes. Do you know where it is?" BJ asked hopefully.
"Nope never seen it!" Frank answered a little too quickly. This caused Hawkeye's already suspicious mind to go into overdrive.
"Hold on. How did you know it was of Peg, Erin and Beej." Hawkeye asked. Frank gulped. Hawkeye continued, "I didn't even know about it."
"Erm." Frank started to back up towards the door. The poblem was that BJ was standing by the door. Frank found himself sandwiched in between two annoyed and drunk captains. "Fellers, come on."
"Where is it Frank?" BJ asked.
"How should I know?" He responded. He was starting to feel uncomfortable now. "Under your pillow still?" He guessed.
"It's not there." Hawkeye said.
"I have no idea where it is, but I want it back." BJ added words backed up with a smile that made Frank feel truly uncomfortable.
"We have been looking for it for the last two hours Frank. It would save us lot of time if you knew where it was." Hawkeye added. "How's about it pal?" He said as he slung a casual arm around Frank.
"I really do not know where it is. Honestly. I was looking for explosives one day when I came across it." Hawkeye and BJ shot a bemused look at each other before they smiled at Frank again. And suddenly he saw a way of getting them to be nice to him even if it was just for a couple of hours. "I'll, um, I could help you look though." This was met with two twinned expressions of shock. Nevertheless Frank found himself twenty minutes later with a flashlight searching the Mess tent for the photo.
It was while he was trudging back to the Swamp having not found the photograph he come across a rather interesting sight. That was the sight of one of the nurses standing outside the Swamp, looking around awkwardly before trying the door. Frank hid behind a bush and observed her slipping something under Hawkeye's pillow. She then paused and looked confused between Hawkeye's and BJ'S bunks. Having come to some sort of decision she removed the object from under Hawkeye's pillow and was in the process of slipping it back into its' rightful place. Frank saw his opportunity and strode in.
"And what do you think you're doing, Lieutenant?" He demanded. The nurse went white and instinctively saluted. The problem was the photograph was still in her hand for all to see. She quickly tried to hide it and got herself even more flustered.
"I think you had better come with me." Frank announced. The nurse gulped audibly before nodding miserably.
Meanwhile Hawkeye was trying to calm BJ down. He was getting almost hysterical about it now. They were now looking in the OR after trying the scrub room, the showers and the latrines. In fact the entire outdoors of the camp had been searched; they even had Klinger searching the rubbish dump. They were still looking in the OR when Margaret came in.
"What are you doing?" She asked, understandably surprised by the site of them now doing a finger tip search of the OR.
"BJ'S lost a very important photo. What you doing here?" Hawkeye responded trying to hide a yawn. Or should I say trying and failing to hide a yawn?
"Oh, couldn't sleep. Thought I would get a head start on restocking supplies." She replied. Hawkeye could tell something was wrong, but didn't dare question her answer. He knew she would open up to someone eventually. It was at that point Frank and an MP came charging in, dragging along a new and frightened nurse. Frank also was waving a photograph. Not just any photograph but the photograph they had been searching for by this point, most of the night.
"I found it. She had it all along." Frank said as BJ snatched it of Frank.
Margaret turned to the nurse utterly confused. "Lieutenant Jacobs, what you doing with Captain Hunnicutts' photograph?"
Lieutenant Jacobs started to cry. She was a timid kind of person, didn't speak much to anyone. Well she didn't speak at all. It was about to become apparent why.
"Because he was nice to me I thought if I could find out something about him it would be a way of starting a conversation and make a friend."
At least that's what Hawkeye translated through her tears and her stammer. Her very prominent stammer, it made it hard for him to understand her. It was hard anyway because of her native hillbilly drawl but crying, stammering and muttering made it equally as difficult. BJ remembered she had been assigned to him in the previous OR session.
"Everyone makes fun of me because of my stammer, it's just easier not to talk to people." She added, still looking at the floor. A bug looked back up at her, unnoticed, give a sort of bug shrug gesture and continued to scurry on its way.
Tears were now cascading down her face. Hawkeye hated to see people cry. However he also saw an opportunity. He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her.
"Hey easy now, it's okay." He mumbled to her.
"I'm sorry. It was dumb; I thought I could put it back before someone noticed."
"Only someone did." Frank interjected.
"Captain Hunnicutt sir. You want to press charges?" The MP asked.
"No. I'm just glad to have this back. Hey, no need to cry." He answered as he placed a hand on her shoulder. "Come here." The young nurse looked up. "This is my wife Peg, and that's my little girl Erin." He said.
Jacobs pulled out a photo of her own. "That's Alison, and James, my younger bro, bro, brother and sis, sis" She sighed.
"Its okay, just take your time." Hawkeye said. Jacobs took her time; in fact she took the rest of the night. She made two friends, BJ got his family portrait back and Hawkeye eventually got to turn his fantasy into reality.
Reviews and feedback welcome. Flames will be used to warm me up, btw English spelling is used because England is where I was born and still live!