Declaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or their characters
It was a strange scene, it seemed to him. First it felt odd to see her cry. It was so surprising and he felt constricted, that was the second. And maybe something he would never admit to be the third was that he somehow wanted her to feel happy again.
He didn't know what had originated her sadness and maybe if he'd known he could have helped, something he would never confess to do. But she was so small and he sensed something rising in his lungs. Desperation. And with every second left unchanged he feared this desperation was only going to grow for the small girl. He was going to be left breathless.
For him it was a kind of illogical. He was a Lord Demon, the most feared by all bellow him or so he thought; she was a human child and nothing more than a speck in his path. Yet she was always at his path, not able to get rid of and he not able to do so; at days she was the only route he took. And yet considering all circumstances and all things he was there keeping a small distance to her, maybe thinking that she would resolve what was conflicting her by herself like he did, that she would reason with herself. But she was just a child and they were more incomprehensible with themselves when they were distraught. Inevitable, he was there again; walking her direction. A means that consisted in making her feel less hungry, or less tired or more cheerful and in this case less sad.
Jaken was already irritated and had tried and failed all times to make her quiet and he even tried to motivate Sesshomaru to leave her there, which to him came all the wrong way. He figured he didn't have the heart to do it. Though now Jaken was somewhere near with Ah-Uh because he couldn't handle humans nagging, leaving him behind although he asked Sesshomaru if he would joined him. Of course he nonchalantly refused.
He knelt behind her without her noticing and tried to assert what was happening. She was still scratching large tears away. And still somehow mourning. For the first time he bit his lips. Uncertain.
"Rin?" he said slowly.
She quickly reacted as she turned his way, big blurs staring confused back. Then relief as she hugged one of his thighs, her grip pleading. Her words came slurred. "Oh, my lord- Sesshomaru, what horrible."
He told himself to look unfazed even though he did not understand what she meant. "Speak clearly, Rin."
She tried to control her sob, keeping quiet for a few seconds establishing herself but then she started to hiccup. Though immediately she swallowed as if allowing an instant of discord before she began, this time only eye puddles. "My little friend. He-he-he is not waking up and-and in the village when people don't wake it means that they're dead… he's dead, lord Sesshomaru."
Before she started crying again he asked: "What…friend?"
Rin let go to crawl over some flowers he did not notice until now, then she pointed a small finger at it. "Th-there. But please," she begged her words coming slurred again, then small "don't disturb him. I already made it comfortable for him to sleep, th-that way he can have nice dreams." She closed her eyes hard. "I know he's not alive but when I'm dead I'd like to have nice dreams too, wouldn't you my lord?"
He wasn't sure but he thought he heard himself sigh wistfully as he stood. Rin had long forgotten him as she started to sing night lullabies with a wobbling voice. He came closer, grabbing one sword in particular from around his waist.
"My lord, what are you doing?" came Jaken from somewhere in the trees. He ignored him though words quickly made Rin react.
"My lord!" she squeaked a little too late.
Sesshomaru slashed his Tenseiga around the air that was above the display of flowers. The tomb.
Rin did not know what he had done so she laid on the ground with wide eyes as a cub of some sort of animal (which Sesshomaru couldn't identify because it was too small, maybe even the reason why he had died) popped out of the small lilies and dandelions and other flora. But Jaken did and instead of a look of wonder, he looked at Sesshomaru with confusion and what appeared to be betrayal maybe for their own race. Possibly because he had helped a human, perhaps because he revived a small animal for the sake of a human-
"My lord-" Jakken started but was interrupted.
"Oh, my lord thank you, thank you!" Rin said jumping up and down, then she went and hugged one of his legs as the animal trailed behind her.
He was momentarily shocked. No one had ever thanked him…and meant it.
Eleven years later….
It was a familiar scene, it seemed to him. First of all he felt unease seeing her cry. He felt paralyze and speechless, was the second. And maybe something he would never acknowledge to be the third was that he felt protective over her happiness.
He didn't know what had originated her sorrow and maybe if he known he could have helped, something he would never admit to be his only flawed weakness. But she was a grown woman now and he sensed something rising in his lungs. Water. And with every second left unchanged he feared this ocean was only going to grow for the small girl he will always see in between his eyes. He was going to be left breathless. He was going to drown.
For him it was kind of illogical to see this happened again and to know that he will be completely hopeless under every circumstance. To know that he was yet again walking her path.
He had come here to the village as one of his weekly visit even though he hadn't seen her in about a month which first led him to think that she was upset because of that. But she wasn't the one to miss his company like she used to, she was too involved with others and what she could help them with to care that greatly. And he was the one cursing himself for missing the days apart. Even though it wasn't that big; it was just one of the things that got to him when he was most solitary.
So as he pushed aside his ego centric thoughts he neared more to her figure crying on the grounds, somewhere near the village, hiding amongst the trees. When he was close enough he knelt beside her and unsure chose to speak. "Rin?"
Rin jumped, turning. Her eyes wide, lashes sticking to her face, her voice came controlled but stirred. "Oh, lord Sesshomaru!" she exclaimed, binding her thing arms around his neck. Something she had never done. "Rin's so glad you're here. I have done it this time, my lord."
"Precision, Rin." He said.
Rin nodded as if she forgotten that. "This Rin is good with helping the women in the village. She makes the process less painful and more easy. And I have been doing well taking the position permanently since Kaede sensei passed. But today was not Rin's day. Nor was it his. Now they distrust my position, or so I think. So I ran here to gather flowers and-"
Sesshomaru shook his head. "I do not understand…"
Rin sighed, bowing her head. She started whimpering as she grabbed one of his sleeves. "I don't either… it was all going so well, she wasn't as distressed giving birth as other women, I even complemented her on that. But I should have taken that as a bad sign, I don't know. And- and-" Rin swallowed, looking up. She opened her mouth and the only sound it came out like a cry. "And when I held it in my hands he was… he was purple.
I had to run because when my assistants realized what had happened it was all chaos and screams and dread. So I decided to pick flowers for when- when-"she sucked in air and collected herself, shard by shard. "My lord you're the only good thing about this day."
Sesshomaru wasn't sure but he thought he heard himself sigh in relief as he unknowingly located a hand in her shoulder. "Do not worry Rin this Sesshomaru has mended whatever you have created."
"What?"
"When I came here I did not find you at first so I went searching for you. Then I came upon human women looking for you, they told me what you have done. In their dimness I tried to explain that it was not your fault if the cub had been dead when you helped the woman give birth.
Yet they still did not trust my word. I told them to show me the place where the cub was and then I used my Tenseiga to revive him. They thanked me even though I told them to thank you."
Rin sighed but it came like a moan. Then she started to cry again, covering her face with her hands. Unlike before she could not handle herself, she was shaking and breathing in so quickly.
"What is it, Rin?" Sesshomary asked, trying to hide his confusion. Humans were equally incomprehensive and uncontrollable and it surprised him when Rin used to conceal these aspects very well.
Rin snapped as she started to jump on her knees, a big grin was painted in her face. "Oh, my lord, you are the only good thing about this day!" She hid her arms behind her back, bit her lips smiling and then came close and out of nowhere lashed her arms around his back. There was this small laps of time where everything froze as she took in a breath. "I love you."
He was momentarily touched. No one had ever told him they loved him.