Ruthie's Problem
Ruthie was really starting to get frustrated that no one believed her. Every time she opened her eyes she saw him, that little midget with blood coming out of his mouth. He told her things, bad things. Kill your parents he said, slash your brother's tires, glue the pages of your father's bible together, shave your dog. In retrospect, the Camden family was rather stupid. They should have noticed the changes in Ruthie's behavior all along. She didn't do anything anymore. All she did was sit in her bedroom and stare at snow on a TV screen. She stopped going to school, to church. She refused to eat to any of the home cooked meals that her mother prepared. She wanted meat and she wanted it raw. The reverend and his wife thought it was just a phase she was going through (Hello!). One afternoon they would discover how wrong they really were.
Ruthie was alone in her house, as usual, when she heard a knock on the front door. Begrudgingly, she went downstairs to answer it. When she opened the door there he was, Timmy the Passion's midget. He was the one who had been haunting her in her dreams, and now was standing there before her. Terrified, she tried to slam the door in his face, but being 3 feet tall, he managed to get in before she could. Ruthie screamed and started to run up the stairs. Unfortunately, he managed to get in front of her as she was running. Luckily just about this time Matt, the oldest son drove into the driveway. He had just recently started working as a waiter at Denny's due to a community service obligation he had to serve due to drunk driving. He heard Ruthie's screams and Timmy's laughs and ran into the house tripping over the welcome mat- apparently the drunk driving allegations hadn't stopped him one bit as he was a little more than tipsy going into the house.
"Ruthie what's wrong?!" Matt slurred as he went through the door.
"Hello! Moron!" She said to him, "there is a demon chasing me around the house!"
"I will save you Ruthie!" He exclaimed, all those years watching The Karate Kid had to come in handy some time.
Oh geeze, thought Ruthie, I am a gonner now. Matt took one kick at Timmy and Timmy bit his foot off. Matt collapsed drunkenly on the floor. Ruthie was on her own again. Happy was busy with some great dane in the back yard.
For the next few hours Ruthie played cat and mouse with Timmy and was starting to get physically exhausted when she managed to lock herself in the basement. Timmy got distracted for a bit watching Happy and the great dane in the yard. The reverend and Mrs. Camden arrived home shortly after, with their twins Sam and David. They had taken the kids to Vegas for a day just to see the sights and the nickel slots. David had had a little too much cocaine and was bouncing off of the walls. Other than that it was a great day for all.
"Ruthie what's wrong?" Reverend Camden asked when he found his daughter trembling in a corner of the basement.
"Timmy, Daddy! He's going to get all of us!"
"Don't worry Ruthie, after we calm down David we will help you!!!" Meanwhile, Timmy had gotten a hold of Sam. He started chanting in his ear and Sam's eyes began to glow red. The reverend saw this as he was coming up the basement stairs. He knew exactly what he should do next.
Call Lucy.
Lucy had been living in Miami Florida for the past year and a half helping the endangered Florida manatees. She had been taking self defense classes due to the fact that at feeding time the manatees got very dangerous. She was pumped up to say the least. Her weight had gone from 89 lbs to 347 in just 2 months. She had come to fight the demon.
On the day that she arrived, Lucy felt that she was ready or at least the family hoped so. For weeks Timmy had been terrorizing them. Their house was no longer the same. Ruthie continued to sit in her room staring at the television and Sam had to be restrained in the basement to keep from harming family members. Mrs. Camden was heartbroken because all she wanted was her baby back. David's drug use continued and the Reverend was so beside himself he could no longer support his family. Bill collectors pursued them incessantly. Matt being the oldest son he could have helped them but all he cared about now was getting his next drink. Lucy had to be the one.
She was ready. Standing face to face with this demon she wondered if she could do it. Timmy snarled his teeth at her. Now she was angry. She used her best karate move on him and managed to at least get him off his feet. He bit her foot off. Now she was REALLY angry. She felt a rage she had never felt before and she managed to get a good kick in at him, tossing him through the window. He screamed in pain but was still going strong. He tried to climb back in through the broken window but she got another kick (with her remaining foot of course) and managed to get rid of the demon once and for all.
The family rejoiced. Life slowly got back to normal. Matt stopped drinking and started taking a pottery class at the local high school. The reverend got tired of being a reverend and got a job as Bob Saget's assistant on Full house. Happy finally got over that great dane. David entered rehab and helped other 3 year old addicts recover. Ruthie won on American Idol with her rendition of the Irene Cara classic "Fame." Lucy went back to her manatees and her working out. And Sam well, it was discovered that he was actually a child prodigy in the tradition of Mozart so he ended up playing the piano for church benefits. Yup it was just another week at the Camdens.
Ruthie was really starting to get frustrated that no one believed her. Every time she opened her eyes she saw him, that little midget with blood coming out of his mouth. He told her things, bad things. Kill your parents he said, slash your brother's tires, glue the pages of your father's bible together, shave your dog. In retrospect, the Camden family was rather stupid. They should have noticed the changes in Ruthie's behavior all along. She didn't do anything anymore. All she did was sit in her bedroom and stare at snow on a TV screen. She stopped going to school, to church. She refused to eat to any of the home cooked meals that her mother prepared. She wanted meat and she wanted it raw. The reverend and his wife thought it was just a phase she was going through (Hello!). One afternoon they would discover how wrong they really were.
Ruthie was alone in her house, as usual, when she heard a knock on the front door. Begrudgingly, she went downstairs to answer it. When she opened the door there he was, Timmy the Passion's midget. He was the one who had been haunting her in her dreams, and now was standing there before her. Terrified, she tried to slam the door in his face, but being 3 feet tall, he managed to get in before she could. Ruthie screamed and started to run up the stairs. Unfortunately, he managed to get in front of her as she was running. Luckily just about this time Matt, the oldest son drove into the driveway. He had just recently started working as a waiter at Denny's due to a community service obligation he had to serve due to drunk driving. He heard Ruthie's screams and Timmy's laughs and ran into the house tripping over the welcome mat- apparently the drunk driving allegations hadn't stopped him one bit as he was a little more than tipsy going into the house.
"Ruthie what's wrong?!" Matt slurred as he went through the door.
"Hello! Moron!" She said to him, "there is a demon chasing me around the house!"
"I will save you Ruthie!" He exclaimed, all those years watching The Karate Kid had to come in handy some time.
Oh geeze, thought Ruthie, I am a gonner now. Matt took one kick at Timmy and Timmy bit his foot off. Matt collapsed drunkenly on the floor. Ruthie was on her own again. Happy was busy with some great dane in the back yard.
For the next few hours Ruthie played cat and mouse with Timmy and was starting to get physically exhausted when she managed to lock herself in the basement. Timmy got distracted for a bit watching Happy and the great dane in the yard. The reverend and Mrs. Camden arrived home shortly after, with their twins Sam and David. They had taken the kids to Vegas for a day just to see the sights and the nickel slots. David had had a little too much cocaine and was bouncing off of the walls. Other than that it was a great day for all.
"Ruthie what's wrong?" Reverend Camden asked when he found his daughter trembling in a corner of the basement.
"Timmy, Daddy! He's going to get all of us!"
"Don't worry Ruthie, after we calm down David we will help you!!!" Meanwhile, Timmy had gotten a hold of Sam. He started chanting in his ear and Sam's eyes began to glow red. The reverend saw this as he was coming up the basement stairs. He knew exactly what he should do next.
Call Lucy.
Lucy had been living in Miami Florida for the past year and a half helping the endangered Florida manatees. She had been taking self defense classes due to the fact that at feeding time the manatees got very dangerous. She was pumped up to say the least. Her weight had gone from 89 lbs to 347 in just 2 months. She had come to fight the demon.
On the day that she arrived, Lucy felt that she was ready or at least the family hoped so. For weeks Timmy had been terrorizing them. Their house was no longer the same. Ruthie continued to sit in her room staring at the television and Sam had to be restrained in the basement to keep from harming family members. Mrs. Camden was heartbroken because all she wanted was her baby back. David's drug use continued and the Reverend was so beside himself he could no longer support his family. Bill collectors pursued them incessantly. Matt being the oldest son he could have helped them but all he cared about now was getting his next drink. Lucy had to be the one.
She was ready. Standing face to face with this demon she wondered if she could do it. Timmy snarled his teeth at her. Now she was angry. She used her best karate move on him and managed to at least get him off his feet. He bit her foot off. Now she was REALLY angry. She felt a rage she had never felt before and she managed to get a good kick in at him, tossing him through the window. He screamed in pain but was still going strong. He tried to climb back in through the broken window but she got another kick (with her remaining foot of course) and managed to get rid of the demon once and for all.
The family rejoiced. Life slowly got back to normal. Matt stopped drinking and started taking a pottery class at the local high school. The reverend got tired of being a reverend and got a job as Bob Saget's assistant on Full house. Happy finally got over that great dane. David entered rehab and helped other 3 year old addicts recover. Ruthie won on American Idol with her rendition of the Irene Cara classic "Fame." Lucy went back to her manatees and her working out. And Sam well, it was discovered that he was actually a child prodigy in the tradition of Mozart so he ended up playing the piano for church benefits. Yup it was just another week at the Camdens.