Chapter One
Max's POV
"Rise and shine, kiddos!" I yelled, going down the hall and opening the doors of each of the flock's rooms. Personally! How nice of me! I stopped at Iggy's room. "You. Pancakes."
Iggy sat up slowly, groaning. "Thanks for being so polite about it," he muttered.
I shrugged. "No big deal."
We were at the steps. I looked behind me. Jeez, it was like follow the leader. There they were, in a line, right behind me. I just wanted to yell "ATTENTION!" and see if they all snapped into a salute and yelled "Yes ma'am!" The were all looking at me. Iggy was looking at the wall.
"Let's go," I said, and we went down the stairs.
Jeb greeted us. "Morning, kids!"
"Morning," we all mumbled.
Iggy went to the sink. "Pancakes, comin' right up!" he said.
Angel smiled. "Yes! Did you hear that, Total? Pancakes!"
Total gave a little yelp and said, "Mmm...Syrup."
I sat down. We were in Colorado again, back in the mountain house. The Erasers hadn't burnt it down, and we decided that since it was bigger, mom, Jeb, and the flock would move there. "Where's Mrs. Mart—Mom?" I asked. I still hadn't gotten used to calling her that.
"Gone to get groceries," said Jeb. "Just like a real mom would."
"Right," said the Gasman.
Jeb sat down across from me, at the other end of the table. "Hey," he said.
"What?" I answered.
"I just got a call from someone. There's going to be someone dropping by the house this afternoon. I'm not going to be here, and your mom has to pick Ella up from an oboe lesson, so I'm assuming you can manage?"
"It depends who," I stated.
"And for how long," added Nudge.
"It's just the plumber," said Jeb. "He's going to fix the leaky faucet in Angel's room."
I heard Total give a sigh of relief. "Thank God," the dog said. "That thing had me having to pee all night long."
I laughed, and Angel giggled.
The smell of pancakes had gotten pretty strong now, and I breathed in. "Mmm...yum. I never did figure out your secret recipe, Ig. Can you tell me? Or would it ruin the secret?"
He looked in my general direction. "Yeah, sure." He grabbed a pan that he had on the stove and pointed at it. "Pan, plus cake," he said, stacking three unheated pancakes on top of each other, "Equals breakfast." He made an equal sign in the air with two pancakes.
It also equals a future job at Bob Evans', I thought.
Angel spoke up. "Max says you should work at Bob Evans," she said.
Again with the thoughts invasion. I swear, that girl was really starting to get on my nerves. Was NOTHING private?
Iggy chuckled. "So now she's trying to get rid of me," he said.
Fang laughed, a rare occasion. "Nah, Ig. Just trying to make you feel at home, that's all. Didn't you hear? Sending someone away is the new nice."
The kitchen door opened, and Mrs. Martinez came through the door. Ella was following her. They both looked overloaded with groceries.
Max stood up and grabbed a few bags. Total came, yelping excitedly. "Did you bring me a steak? Did you? Did you?"
"Max," said Jeb. "Do you really think you'll be okay?"
I rolled my eyes and looked at Fang. "Pretty sure we'll be able to handle a plumber, Jeb."
He didn't laugh, didn't display any emotion.
Oookaay, I thought. That's kind of creepy.
"So what's the best place to starve off a zombie stiege?" I heard Gazzy asking Iggy. The Gasman had gone up to Iggy at the sink after Ig had said something about bombs and fires.
Iggy began to answer, "Well, I'd prefer a nice, dark cave or den..."
I stopped listening there. Angel and Nudge were talking about Barbies and which one of the twelve dancing princesses was best.
Fang was feeding Total some cold pieces of bacon.
Geezums, no one could make a good conversation like they used to.
"Everybody going to be okay when the Evil Plumber of Doom comes?"
"Yeah," the entire flock said.
"Arf," said Total, chuckling. "Gets me every time."
So nothing bad would happen, of course, because he's a plumber. But I'm not going to take responsibility if something does. I'm blaming it on Jeb.
Little did I know that from that day on, I would have an immense fear of plumbers.