A/N: This is my latest CSI: Miami one-shot. It follows Eric after he gives Ryan money to take Natalia on the date. Spoilers for the 4th season.
Summary: She had once told him that love was like a butterfly. He hadn't understood what she meant. Until now.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
There wasn't enough beer in his apartment to get him through this. He couldn't stand her being on a date with Ryan.
You were inexclusive. The annoying voice in his head is back.
Doesn't mean she can go and date Ryan. The other side of his brain tells him.
Eric picks up his third beer and takes a sip...or was it his fourth? He didn't really remember anything.
He had never really loved a girl like this before.
You really screwed this one up buddy. Cleared for landing? What were you thinking?
And now as he sat there, he realized for the first time why he didn't do exclusive relationships.
It just hurt so damn much to see her off with someone else. He had never felt so much pain in his life.
He wonders if the knife that feels like it's stuck in his heart is going to stay there.
The things she's said to him at some point or another are looping around his brain. There are pictures of her, pictures of him, pictures of them, laughing, smiling, making crazy faces
It's driving him crazy to see her. He wants her with him, to hold her and kiss her. He just wants to feel her warmth.
He's feeling numb. He vaguely hears the phone ring in the background, but doesn't bother to get up and answer.
She once told him that love was like a butterfly. That if you held it too tight, it would crush, but if you held it too loose, then it would fly away. He had never understood what she meant.
Until now, that is.
Looking back, he had done both. He held her too loosely until he thought he was loosing her, when he began to hold her too tight.
Stupid. Stupid stupid stupid.
He thinks about calling her and asking to talk to her for a couple of minutes, but decides against it, wanting to sober up a bit before he says anything he regrets.
It's now 3 AM. He doesn't care that he's waking her up at an incredibly unreasonable time.
He rings the doorbell. She answers the door, yawning, wearing boy shorts and a t-shirt. He notices, and it makes him smile slightly, that the t-shirt is one that he left here.
"Eric?" She yawns again. "Do you have any clue what time it is?"
"I know it's late 'Talia, but this really can't wait." He gently reaches out to brush a stray piece of hair out of her face.
She nods. "Ok, come in." He follows her into the kitchen and sits down at the breakfast bar while she sets a pot of coffee up.
"Just uhhh let me go and uhh change." She says, turning slightly to go upstairs.
"Don't." Eric finds himself saying. "Please, I just need to get this out."
"Ok." She pours herself and him a cup of coffee and slides it across the counter to him. Natalia leans her elbows on the island and looks at him.
"So what's up?" She asks.
"Butterfly." He smiles at her. Her jaw drops as she starts to stutter. "I never realized just how much you affected me."
"What do you mean?" Her head is cocked to slightly to the right, like it always did when she was confused.
"I can't stand it." He says.
"Expound please."
"You. Ryan. Together. I just... I guess I just want you to myself." He smiles at her.
"Eric, we tried this." Natalia reminds him.
"I know. I know." He says, pushing the coffee away. "I know I screwed up. I know I messed it up. And I know we really had a good thing going. And I still want that 'thing' going, except I want to change it." He stands up and walks around the counter to where she's standing. "I want you and only you."
Tears come to her eyes. "I... I... I can't." She pulls away from him and walks quickly to the living room. He follows. "I can't get hurt again. I'm hurt right now. And I've been hurt by people before. It's what happens when you trust people. I put way too much trust in you and it all broke with one sentence." He cuts her off by wrapping his arms around her and kissing her.
At first she does nothing, but then she responds, wrapping her arms around his neck.
He pulls away first, after a couple of moments. "We'll take this at whatever pace you want. Slow, fast. Hell, if you don't want to date, then I'm ok with that, but I really need to know now 'Talia."
"Yes." She rests her head on his chest as he pulls her in even closer and wraps his arms around her even tighter. He places a kiss on the top of her head as his thoughts fly around his head, on one topic for the first time all night.
A/N: Yeah, it's been a while since I've written an EdeN one shot. I felt like writing it, so I did. If you could push the lilac "Go" button, that would just make my day.