Disclaimer: I do NOT own Dalton or any of its characters. They all belong to that amazing creature called Miss CP Coulter.
NOTHING EVER CHANGES
"Daddy! Daddy!" screams little five-year-old Logan with a huge, excited smile on his tiny face as he runs to the door.
Normally, he doesn't greet his father like that - Mom wouldn't allow that. Logan is just a little kid and he doesn't really understands this, but he knows Dad gets upset when he screams like that, and Mom says it's because he's stressed from work. But today isn't like any other day, and Logan figures today it's alright to scream, so he screams and flings his arms around Dad's leg as soon as Dad sets foot inside the house.
Logan lifts his head, looking at his father with his beautiful, enormous green eyes full of sheer joy. Dad stares back, startled, but he doesn't seem angry.
"What's going on, Logan?"
Logan's eyes brighten up even more and he starts laughing excitedly while his father frowns at him.
"He's got some really big news," Mom says. Logan can't see her, but he's sure she's smiling.
"Really?" Dad asks lifting an eyebrow.
Logan nods vigorously and lets go of his father's leg.
"Tell Dad the news, darling," suggests Mom kindly stroking little Logan's blond hair.
"Yes Mommy!" says the kid happily. "Daddy we're having a talent show at school! And I'm gonna sing!"
"Oh," is all Dad's got to say.
Logan is so excited he starts jumping up and down.
"Ok, you calm down now, kid," laughs Mom picking him up and holding him.
"But this is the best news ever!" Logan protests, making Mom laugh even more.
"I know, I know..." she says. Then she turns to Dad. "He's been practicing no less than fifteen different songs and I think he's not even done yet."
"When's this talent show gonna be?" Dad asks.
Logan's eyes sparkle in joy. Dad wants to know when the talent show is! Dad wants to come and see him!
"Teacher said November 17th," Logan answers.
"17th, uh? Well, I'm sure you'll have a lot of fun, you'll tell me about it afterwards."
Logan's face immediately fell.
"B-but Daddy," he says, his lips trembling. "Don't you want to come and see me?"
"I can't, Logan, I have a meeting and I can't skip it."
Logan feels a twitch of pain in his chest but doesn't say anything. Mom does, though.
"John, don't you think..." she begins. But Dad cuts her off.
"Cordelia, don't even start on that. My job is important and the kid knows that. Don't you, Logan?"
Logan nods but refuses to meet his father's eyes again.
"Good," Dad says. "Now, can I have some dinner? I've had a very long day..."
Later that night, Logan cries in his bed. He knows Dad is busy and everything... he just really wanted him to come at the show. Logan is going to sing in front of all of those people, it's a really really big deal! And he wants Dad to be there. But Dad says he's busy, he can't be there. Maybe... maybe Dad doesn't even want to see him perform, now that Logan thinks about that.
Logan curls up in his bed and keeps crying until he falls asleep. He's five and for the first time in his life, he doesn't know if his father loves him.
Sixteen-year-old Logan is doing his Maths homework when his phone rings.
"Hello?"
"Hi Logan! How are you?" greets him Michelle's voice from the other end of the line. Logan sighs.
"Hi Michelle. I'm fine, thanks. You?"
"Everything's fine here too, honey!" she says happily. "Oh, I've got some news for you: I'm gonna be there at Dalton for the Winter Festival! Isn't that wonderful?"
Michelle sounds so genuinely thrilled that Logan can't help smiling a little.
"Sounds great," he says. Michelle is always so nice to him, the least he can do is be nice to her too.
"I knew you'd be happy!" she says and Logan can practically hear her beaming from his side of the line. "I'm just sorry your Dad can't come along, but he has to attend some debate, or something."
"Or he'd simply rather die than come and see me," says Logan in a matter-of-fact tone. "Same old news."
"Don't talk like that," replies Michelle sadly with a sigh. "He cares for you. I know he does."
"...yeah."
None of them talks for a minute, until Michelle lets out a little chuckle.
"Ok, enough serious stuff," she says. "So tell me, any cute guy caught your eye yet?"
Ten minutes later, when Logan finally hangs up, he doesn't really know how he feels. Well, he feels angry as usual, but apart from that... he just doesn't know.
Michelle is going to be there for the Winter Festival. His father isn't. Same old news, right, and it's probably for the best since every time he meets his father something is bound to go wrong. Truth is, he doesn't know whether to be happy because at least there will be no drama, or to cry because his own father doesn't give a shit about him.
Logan is all alone in his Dalton room, so he cries. He's sixteen and he knows his father does not love him, but he doesn't know if things are ever gonna change.
Now twenty-seven-year-old Logan knocks on his father's door.
It's strange to find himself outside that door again. He hasn't been there in a year, but he really needs to get some things he forgot there. He's moving to LA in a few days, there's just no escaping anymore.
His father opens the door. He hasn't seen him since the day he left that house too.
"Hi."
"Hello, Logan."
...not awkward at all.
"Your things are in your old room," John Logan Wright, Jr. says. "I suppose you still remember where it is, right?"
"Right," Logan answers with a tiny smirk.
His father nods and lets him in. Logan goes straight to his old room without wasting time looking around. That's not his home anyway. Not anymore.
When he enters the room, he's surprised to see everything's exactly as it was when he still lived here. Well. Almost exactly.
His bed is made and his posters are still there, but there's no photo of him, Derek and Julian on the nightstand and he knows most of his clothes are missing from the closet.
Logan sighs and starts looking for the things he left here. It takes him no more than twenty minutes to find and pack everything.
When he leaves his room, he finds his father waiting for him.
"You done?" he asks. Logan nods.
Without saying a word, his father walks him to the door. He doesn't offer him a coffee or anything, but then again, Logan never expected him to.
Logan steps out of the door and is just about to say goodbye when his father talks.
"Michelle told me you're getting married to Julian Larson," he says.
Well. That's... unexpected. What happened to his father's usual policy of ignoring everything gay-related? Or Logan-related?
And why the hell is Michelle the one who told him when the media are still going crazy over the news five freaking months after the official announcement? And what about the invitation he is sure he sent him three months ago anyway?
"I am," he confirms, still a bit startled. "Tomorrow at three. I... I believe Michelle is coming, right?"
"I think so. Well, goodbye."
"Bye."
As he watches the door closing, Logan feels extremely stupid. For a tiny little instant he thought his father cared enough to go to his son's wedding and be just a little happy for him. But of course John Logan Wright, Jr. wouldn't do that.
Logan breaths deeply as hot tears start falling from his eyes. He doesn't know why he's doing this, really.
He's got his own life now, he's got his friends and he's about to get married to the guy he's been in love with for ten years. He shouldn't let his father ruin his life anymore.
Logan's mad at him. Always had been and probably always will. But still, as much as he despises his father, as glad as he is not to have anything to do with him anymore... he knows there will always be some part of him craving for his affection.
Logan knows it's probably silly and childish. He's a man now. A man who happens to be very happy and content with his life too. He just... he just wants a real Dad. His Dad. Is... is it to much to ask for? A Dad? A parent who cares for him and loves him no matter what?
Logan gets on his car and tries wiping away his tears, but they just seem to refuse to stop falling. He's twenty-seven and he finally knows nothing ever changes.
AUTHOR'S NOTES
That's it. Hope you liked it. Logan's one of my favourite characters, I find him truly fascinating, plus I can somehow relate to him. So yeah. I love him very dearly and I like writing about him. And Jogan. Besides, I totally did not want to put that little hint of Jogan in... but in the end, I just couldn't help myself 'cause Jogan makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. So sue me. I'm a hopeless fangirl xD
I'd really appreciate some feedback, most importantly I'd love it if you could point out any grammar/spelling mistake I may have made... English is not my first language and I really really want to improve my English.
Thanks for reading my little fic, I lessthanthree you all!
Hugs&Butterfly Kisses
PurpleSummer:)