The first time Kevin Price has sex, he is fifteen years old. He is at a wrap party for his high school's spring musical, at the home of some upperclassmen he doesn't know. His mom drops him off on her way to her night shift at the hospital, and he assure her he will get a ride home from a classmate. He arrives late and makes his way down to the basement where the other students are gathered.
He was told it would be a wholesome party, but clearly he was misinformed; music is blaring from a stereo and a fixture in the corner of the ceiling scatters colored lights erratically around the room. It is disorienting. Students are dancing or chatting or coupled up in the shadows. A group of boys are shouting around a table covered in red plastic cups, there are liquor bottles strewn across a row of chairs, and there is a girl who, Price notices embarrassedly, is not wearing a shirt. He looks around nervously and wonders if he should just leave.
A hand falls on his shoulder and Price jumps. He turns around to see Jennifer Parker, a perky seventeen-year-old with long straight blonde hair. "Kevin!" she shrieks with an ecstatic smile, waving her arms in the air with excitement. She is standing too close to him, and Price is off-put; he wonders why Jennifer, a Junior (a Junior!) and one of the lead actresses is talking to him, a Freshman chorus boy. "Kevin!" she says again when he turns around, as if seeing him for the first time. She leans in closer, then lowers her voice to an attempt at a flirtatious rasp drawing out each syllable of his name, "Kevin Price…" She slowly draws her hand down from his shoulder to his forearm, resting the other hand on his chest.
She looks up at him alluringly and slurs, "Kevin Price…you…are so cute." She giggles and jabs his chest with a manicured finger for emphasis, but doesn't break eye contact. Price fumbles for what to say, and without warning Jennifer clumsily clutches his shoulders and stands on her toes, her lips tantalizingly close to his ear. She wavers for a moment, steadies herself, then whispers seductively, "Kevin Price…you…can do anything you want to me."
Price doesn't know what to say. He looks dumbfounded and averts his eyes. He steps back and starts to put his hands out in protest, but Jennifer grabs his head with both hands and pulls him down into an aggressive kiss. He sputters at first, his eyes wide with shock, and he tries to pull away, but then…it is electrifying. It is incredible. He doesn't want to stop. He lets his hands fall awkwardly to her lithe hips and draws her close.
She withdraws abruptly. Price is confused. Jennifer reassures him with a playful gaze—this is what she intended. She extends her hand, beckoning him to take it, and she leads him into one of the bedrooms.
It is over quickly and afterward Price fumbles to fasten his belt buckle, his hands shaking slightly. Jennifer has already dressed, and she runs her fingers through her hair as she walks over to Price beside the bed. She lightly strokes his face with her hand and he follows her gaze, silently. She puts a finger up to his lips and says coyly, "Now, let's not tell anyone about this, OK?" Then she walks out of the room and clicks the door softly behind her.
That is the last time he talks to Jennifer Parker.
The first few times, it is the same. The girls throw themselves at him, and he certainly doesn't refuse them, but he is unsure of himself. He feels sloppy and awkward, not confident in what he wants and not in command of what is going on. But he learns, and he finds that what he enjoys most is the attention, the veritable reverence the girls have for him because he is Kevin Price, amazing and beautiful.
After a while, he is not just obliging requests, he is pursuing. It is easy—so easy. The seemingly-innocent, dashingly handsome religious boy image is a turn on for Saints and Gentiles alike, and he doesn't have to work hard to have any girl he pleases. They will do anything to be with him, absolutely anything. He realizes that that first time transformed him—it taught him how it all works. He becomes more confident, more aggressive. He takes what is his. Most are one night stands; a few are short relationships, no longer than a couple months, but he has little interest in returning their affections. To be truthful, he doesn't feel much of anything for them.
What interests Price is their interest in him, the feeling of being wanted, worshiped even. He craves the control, the conquest, the enormous adrenaline rush and ego boost of having another give themselves to him because they want him oh so badly. In Price's mind, in his experience, sex is something that is never truly equal; there is always one person who is in control, and he likes that person to be himself.
Price picks up on Elder McKinley's interest immediately; when he first walks into the meeting house in Uganda he sees McKinley practically swoon, and that excites him immensely. He notices McKinley's glances and the way the District Leader makes excuses to touch him or stand near him. Price thinks it is embarrassing that McKinley believes he is being inconspicuous.
More importantly, Price thinks about how this is an interesting new wrinkle. He has never before noticed another man checking him out, and he wonders if this is something he wants to pursue. On the second morning he catches Elder McKinley watching him from across the meeting house during study with doe-eyed infatuation, and Price decides at that moment: Yes.
The night after the baptisms, the villagers and Elders are reveling in a feast under the large awning set up outside of the living quarters to celebrate their entry into the Church. The canopy is a patchwork of bed sheets held up with bamboo poles, and it is strung up with twinkling yellow electric lights that sway in the humid evening breeze.
The Elders are milling around with the villagers, eating and chatting. Price approaches Elder McKinley by a table stacked with trays of desserts, and hastily grabs a hold of Elder McKinley's hand, saying, "I need to talk to you."
Before McKinley can say anything, Price is dragging the older man away from the tent and toward the back of the house. McKinley can only stammer fragments of questions—"Elder Price… wait… what are you…?"—as Price leads him to the area behind the kitchen, lit only in shadows from the party out front. Price stops and backs McKinley roughly against the brick wall. They are standing toe to toe.
Price is breathing heavily and his chest heaves, but his eyes are locked on McKinley's with a look that the District Leader is unable to read. "Do you want me?" Price demands. It is a question to which he already knows the answer.
McKinley stares back at him, eyes wide in terror, face flushed. He doesn't respond. Several tense seconds pass and they stare at one another, Price determined and confident, McKinley mortified and bewildered. Then Price cups McKinley's chin in his broad hand and brushes a gentle thumb across cheek. He asks again slowly and deliberately, "Do you want me, Elder McKinley?" At the touch, McKinley wilts. His breath hitches and he shuts his eyes tight. He bites his lower lip, gulps nervously and exhales a nearly inaudible, "Yes."
Price pulls McKinley's head towards him and kisses him roughly, deeply, his tongue darting into the other's mouth. The two crash back against the wall as he bucks his hips against McKinley. Price has both his hands entwined in McKinley's hair, and McKinley's have already untucked Price's shirt and are cascading across his smooth skin, groping and exploring his chest, stomach, the small of his back.
He kisses McKinley harder and McKinley hums with surprise and pleasure against his lips. He pulls his head back, his breath still hot against McKinley's cheek, and asks, panting, "What do you want me to do to you?" McKinley's head is swimming; he can't focus, he doesn't know what to say. Price dives back in and laps hungrily at McKinley's neck, trailing down to his collar bone. A moan catches in McKinley's throat as he leans his head back against the wall and shuts his eyes tight. "Oh God…" he gasps breathlessly, "Anything…you can do anything…"
When Price finishes, he is quick to compose himself. McKinley is scrabbling lethargically, his mind still reeling—he collapses against the wall, clumsily buttoning his shirt and straightening his tie. He hoists himself up onto shaky legs and takes a step toward Price, throwing his arms around Price's shoulders. He smiles blearily with intense joy, and leans in for a kiss. Price flinches almost imperceptibly, then obliges.
McKinley notices Price's hesitation and disengages, looking up at him with sad confusion. "What is it?"
Price sighs and says, "Listen, this was great, but that's all I'm looking for right now." His indifference is thinly concealed and McKinley winces, feeling like something inside him has broken.
"That's…all?" McKinley cocks his head to the side and searches Price's eyes, trying to understand. He feels tears welling up, and he bits his lip to hold them back. He gropes for what to say to make Price change his mind. "But…I…"
Price shushes McKinley before he can continue, and puts a finger softly up to the District Leader's lips. With a self-satisfied smile, he coos, "Now, let's not tell anyone about this, OK?" Then without another word, he walks away and back to the party.