Rift - a fun angsty Subaru songfic
by Anna, song by Phish
first TB fic! don't be too hard on me!
R&R please?
His dreams had been disturbing, he knew that much, even though he couldn't remember any details. Only small things- like sakura petals. His chest moved up and down shallowly as harsh breaths escaped his lips. Finally, unable to avoid it any more, Sumeragi Subaru of the well-respected Sumeragi onmyouji clan, opened his eyes. It was still dark.
~~
Last night in the moments my thoughts were adrift
And coasting a terrace approaching a rift
Through which I could spy several glimpses beneath
Of the darkness the light from above could not reach…
~~
He padded over to the table in his small, cramped apartment and jotted a note to himself to shave his face when he woke up again that morning. It was getting stubbly and he hadn't noticed until he looked in the- he jumped, startled at his own reflection, and turned away. After a minute, almost afraid of looking again, he stepped closer to the small mirror on the wall hesitantly. He looked terrible. His green eyes were bloodshot and weary, his face veined and lined from lack of sleep for fear of the nightmares.
He eyed a single gray hair with a dispassionate eye. Hokuto would have hated to see him like thi-
Hokuto.
If she were here, he wouldn't /look/ like this, he mused humorlessly. An odd mark on his hand throbbed. He covered it with his other palm.
~~
I spied wings of reason herself taking flight
And upon yonder precipice saw her alight
And glare back at me, one last look of dismay
As if she were the last one she thought I'd betray…
~~
He touched his hand to the mirror, and it subdued the dull ache a little with its cool touch. He noticed a shadow of a man behind him-? He spun around. No, that was his coat hanger. He wasn't sure whether he was saddened or relieved by this.
"Sumeragi Subaru, you are one sick fuck," he said out loud, then blinked, surprised at himself. He never cursed. And he hadn't talked for ages. He'd nearly forgotten what his voice sounded like.
"…Seishirou-san," he whispered, twisting his fingers together nervously. Nothing happened.
"Seishirou-san. Seishirou-san." It felt good. He raised his voice. "Seishirou-san!"
There was a pounding on the wall. "Shut up! We're trying to sleep! Have sex some other place!"
Subaru laughed, a slightly alarming hysterical sound. He slid his balcony doors open and closed his eyes as the cool early air hit him in a rush, blowing his bangs off his forehead.
~~
And silence, contagious in moments like these
Consumed me and strengthened my will to appease
The passion that sparked me one terrible night
And shocked and persuaded my soul to ignite…
~~
He leaned over the edge of the balcony and looked down at the bright lights of Tokyo, shining in the early-morning light like a carnival. He had been asked once if he loved Tokyo.
"Seishirou-san!" he yelled over the edge. "Seishirou-san!"
His voice broke. "SEISHIROU-SAN! SEISHIROU-SAN! SEISHIROU-SAN!"
~~
And so fell the weight I never can lift
Behind us, the darkness, between us, the rift…
~~
by Anna, song by Phish
first TB fic! don't be too hard on me!
R&R please?
His dreams had been disturbing, he knew that much, even though he couldn't remember any details. Only small things- like sakura petals. His chest moved up and down shallowly as harsh breaths escaped his lips. Finally, unable to avoid it any more, Sumeragi Subaru of the well-respected Sumeragi onmyouji clan, opened his eyes. It was still dark.
~~
Last night in the moments my thoughts were adrift
And coasting a terrace approaching a rift
Through which I could spy several glimpses beneath
Of the darkness the light from above could not reach…
~~
He padded over to the table in his small, cramped apartment and jotted a note to himself to shave his face when he woke up again that morning. It was getting stubbly and he hadn't noticed until he looked in the- he jumped, startled at his own reflection, and turned away. After a minute, almost afraid of looking again, he stepped closer to the small mirror on the wall hesitantly. He looked terrible. His green eyes were bloodshot and weary, his face veined and lined from lack of sleep for fear of the nightmares.
He eyed a single gray hair with a dispassionate eye. Hokuto would have hated to see him like thi-
Hokuto.
If she were here, he wouldn't /look/ like this, he mused humorlessly. An odd mark on his hand throbbed. He covered it with his other palm.
~~
I spied wings of reason herself taking flight
And upon yonder precipice saw her alight
And glare back at me, one last look of dismay
As if she were the last one she thought I'd betray…
~~
He touched his hand to the mirror, and it subdued the dull ache a little with its cool touch. He noticed a shadow of a man behind him-? He spun around. No, that was his coat hanger. He wasn't sure whether he was saddened or relieved by this.
"Sumeragi Subaru, you are one sick fuck," he said out loud, then blinked, surprised at himself. He never cursed. And he hadn't talked for ages. He'd nearly forgotten what his voice sounded like.
"…Seishirou-san," he whispered, twisting his fingers together nervously. Nothing happened.
"Seishirou-san. Seishirou-san." It felt good. He raised his voice. "Seishirou-san!"
There was a pounding on the wall. "Shut up! We're trying to sleep! Have sex some other place!"
Subaru laughed, a slightly alarming hysterical sound. He slid his balcony doors open and closed his eyes as the cool early air hit him in a rush, blowing his bangs off his forehead.
~~
And silence, contagious in moments like these
Consumed me and strengthened my will to appease
The passion that sparked me one terrible night
And shocked and persuaded my soul to ignite…
~~
He leaned over the edge of the balcony and looked down at the bright lights of Tokyo, shining in the early-morning light like a carnival. He had been asked once if he loved Tokyo.
"Seishirou-san!" he yelled over the edge. "Seishirou-san!"
His voice broke. "SEISHIROU-SAN! SEISHIROU-SAN! SEISHIROU-SAN!"
~~
And so fell the weight I never can lift
Behind us, the darkness, between us, the rift…
~~