Disclaimer…I don't own Harry Potter or anything associated with it, no matter how hard I try to pretend otherwise. Because if I did, I'd be married to Harry.

A/N:. In Sirius's pov

Screaming. Lots of screaming. I didn't know where it was coming

from…somewhere far away…

Cold. Absolutely freezing. I thought I was going to die of hypothermia.

Hooded figures. Two of them. Closing in.

It was me who was screaming, them bringing the cold. Making me relive the worst moments of my life.

Rubble of a house I knew so well. The Potter's residence. I heard the screaming, crying of a child. I knew at once what had happened. I searched through the wreckage and found what I was dreading seeing. Two corpses. Lily and James Potter. My best friend and his wife. I stared at their pale faces until a rasping sob of a baby caught my attention. Harry. I looked at him; he had blood running down his face from a lightening shaped scar.

In the street, evening having just dawned. My best friend- or rather, who I believed to my best friend- Peter Pettigrew stood staring at me with his wand raised. 'You killed Lily and James Peter!! You killed them! This is your fault!!' He showed no signs of hearing, or caring. He lifted his wand higher and muttered something six syllables long. Everyone around was dead. I saw Peter slice off a finger and turn into the rat he was and retreat down into the sewers.

The dementors were edging closer. I couldn't stand the cold, the unhappiness anymore. I wanted to die. Then, I remembered…Harry. Live for Harry. Hold on for your godson because now, he has no one to rely on, not a single person in all of Britain. I'm innocent and I will get out of here. But the dementors were coming ever closer. Their lips almost touching my own. I was one kiss away from soulessness.

"Sirius. Sirius! Wake up, Sirius!" Some one was screaming from far above me.

"Mmm..Who's..What's…?" I mumbled.

"Sirius. It's Harry. Don't be thick."

"What's wrong? Are you all right? Are you sick? Hurt?" My 'fatherly' instincts kicked on.

"Um, no. You were screaming. Are you okay?" He asked. I was screaming. Great.

"Fine, just dandy Harry." I said I didn't want to worry him.

"You sure?" Harry asked. I nodded sleepily. Harry looked at me. "You're not okay. You were dreaming about something."

"Okay, fine. I was." Curse that boy. I just couldn't lie to him.

"What were you dreaming about?" Harry asked as he sat on the edge of my bed.

"Azkaban." I muttered. Harry looked at me for a moment, contemplating what he should do. He then, with out warning, was leaning against my chest in a gentle embrace. My godson…silencing my screams in the dead of night. It was usually the other way around. But, then, it was nice to know some one cared.

But that was before. Before I was cast beyond this accursed veil. There is nothing here, nowhere to go, no way out. I don't think it is death…but only much worse. In death, I could have been with James…and in theory been watching over Harry's every move. I've no idea if the boy is alive or if Voldemort has won. Here, there is only space to think. To relive. It is as though your life is a play and you are its soul audience. Every day, I watch another day from my existence. From the marauding nights back at Hogwarts, to my tortured time in Azkaban, to the beloved short time I spent with my godson. Thinking and reminiscing. Wishing I could change the outcome of half the occurrences of my life. If I'd done things differently, I may not be here now. I'd be with Harry.

I've been here for over a year now, and have wandered around this emptiness relentlessly. Nothing is ever any different. Everything the same. It's enough to drive even me mad. I don't even think it is possible to die. I've had no food or drink as long as I have been here, and am still existing, however painfully it may be. I'm doomed to walk this abyss forever. Nothing can save me…

Suddenly, from nowhere at all, with no warning what so ever, the room from the Department of Mysteries materialized around me. At first, I thought I was reliving the day I fell behind the veil. But no one was in the room, and a strange feeling was telling me I should Apparate straight to Lupin's house.

I'd almost forgotten how to Apparate and the sensation was strange when I did so, and I feared I'd done it wrong. I, however, fell right into Remus's kitchen and knew I had been successful.

Everyone looked up with gasps of fear and disbelief. I myself was a little shocked at my being there. I was beaming, but the smile evaporated off my face as I saw everyone's eyes were red and puffy. A part of me knew this wasn't an epidemic of pinkeye.

"S-sirius?" Remus asked as he walked over to me.

"Remus." I said. My voice was strained and raspy after having not used it in over a year. I was suddenly extremely thirsty and ravenous. I was about to ask the werewolf if he had any food, when I noticed a horrible expression on his face.

Having known Remus for so long, I knew the precise way he looked when there was something painful he needed to tell you, but didn't want to make you sad. That was the exact expression he was holding right now.

"What's wrong, Remus?" I asked.

"Sirius…" He started. I knew what ever he was going to say was far from good. I looked around the room, at all the people gathered there. Tonks, McGonagall, Kingsley, Moody, and every other member of the Order, Hermione and her parents, Fleur and every Weasley to date. They all held similar expressions of grief and sorrow. Then, it struck me. There was a horrible absence in the room.

"Where's Harry?" I growled almost afraid to know the answer.

"Sirius…the-the battle with Voldemort…the final battle, it took a lot from him. Voldemort is dead." Remus struggled to continue. I had a premonition as to what he was going to say. I prayed I was wrong. "H-harry…is dead also."

"No…" I closed my eyes, taking deep breaths. "NO!" I screamed, completely hysterical. I began to cry. I didn't want to, but couldn't stop. My godson was dead. Dead. I failed James and Lily. I couldn't keep him safe.

I wished more than anything I was back beyond the veil.

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It would be exceptionally amazing if you could take twenty-seven seconds and review. Tell me if it sucked or what ever you think. As this is my first fanfic on the site…I need to know how I can improve..thanks!!