This story has been done before in so many different ways, but I wanted to humanize it a bit and fill in the thoughts and feelings of Revan (Skye) during her journey through the adventure. That's why I'm writing this from a first person perspective in journal style format. So, even if you are all too familiar with the events in KOTOR, I hope my version can present the inner struggle of the characters in more depth. Yes, I had to tweak a few events and add things that would be more interesting in order to present this story in a 'real time' format. I hope some of you enjoy this. If you do, please let me know. Thanks!
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars and make no money from the writing of this fiction.
Day One
I found this empty data pad in a storage container in my quarters today. I decided it would be worth my while to begin writing of my days as so much of my past seems vague to me.
My name is Skye Avery and I'm twenty eight years old, I believe. I can't seem to recall my childhood, except I've been told my parents are now deceased. I've spent my adult life as a smuggler on the Corellian Run, smuggling spices, weapons, explosives and various other items until the Republic asked me to join their fight against the Sith.
I realize my memory capacity is not what it should be - perhaps the result of an implant defect. For instance, I can't seem to remember anyone I may have known before joining the Republic forces. I cannot recall friends, lovers, or acquaintances. I don't remember what my family looked like. The doctor at the military base warned me that such a thing can happen following a major trauma in one's life. I wish I could recall what that trauma was.
That is why I decided to keep a record of my days hence forth. Perhaps I'll be able to remember people and places better if I write about them each day. It's worth a try.
Presently, I'm sitting in my quarters on a Republic starship called the Endar Spire. They recruited me for my security and repair skills and I've been helping to encode an emergency lockdown system for the ship in case of an attack. This would enable key areas of the ship to be isolated from any hostile parties that may board. It's not the most exciting work, but the people are friendly enough. My cabin mate, Trask Ulgo, works the shift opposite mine so I really don't see much of him at all except in passing. He seems very devoted to his duties.
I can't help but feel a bit apart from everyone else. I don't know if it's my smuggling background that keeps people at a distance. I suppose they might think of me as untrustworthy. I sometimes feel that others are watching me closely, as if waiting for me to stick some parts in my pocket to sell later at the next space port.
But they also seem impressed with my skills and so begrudge me a little respect. Why did I accept this mission? I really don't know. Another reason why I should be writing my thoughts down frequently! Perhaps, I was tired of being on the run all the time and living life on the edge. Trask jokes that the Republic got tired of trying to catch me so they decided to hire me instead. Why I'm not sitting in a prison somewhere is anyone's guess.
But the Republic is desperate for soldiers these days - enough to overlook my shady past. And how am I to return to my smuggling career if I've forgotten who all my contacts were? No, this will have to suffice for now.
Well, I suppose I should get some rest before Trask comes back and wakes me for my shift. I wonder how long it will be before we get into a battle? No tells me anything.
Day Two
We are getting closer to battle, or so say the rumors among the crew. Apparently, we are headed toward a planet called Taris in the Outer Rim on the very fringes of Republic space. The Sith Armada seems to think that Taris is too far from the Galactic Core for the Republic to bother with. They have invaded the planet and have taken control of its urban population.
Therefore, our fleet is on the way, trying to stop the Sith from spreading even further into Republic space, as that seems to be their goal. It's interesting that our mission is headed by none other than a Jedi, one named Bastila. Trask says she's very important to the Republic war effort and we are required to protect her at all costs. Something about that doesn't sound right to me. Wouldn't a Jedi be more able to defend herself than the rest of us grunts? And why is she so key to this war? Surely she's not the only Jedi left in the universe. Good thing I'm just here to fix things. I'll leave the fighting to the pros.
Day Three
I caught a glimpse of the Jedi today. I had to program the new codes into the main terminal on the bridge and there she was when I walked in. She was younger than I thought she'd be for so important a person. She had brown hair and eyes that bore right into me as I entered through the door. I didn't feel welcomed. I must have surprised her or something. Perhaps she didn't like a new face showing up in her command center so suddenly. I explained I was here to enter the new codes. She nodded and said, "Very well, proceed." Her defensive stance disturbed me, however, and I wondered if she was always so guarded. I mean, I don't even carry a weapon and I don't think I look scary.
I made my way to the front of the bridge and sat in the empty pilot's seat. I explained what I was doing to the co-pilot and she just nodded and continued with her duties. I had just about finished with my task when a voice startled me from behind.
"Did I lose my job?" he asked.
I turned around and saw a high ranking officer standing there with a small grin on his handsome face. Yes, he was pleasant to look at and I have to admit my nerves seemed to think so too.
"I… uh… was just putting the new codes…," I clumsily explained. What was wrong with me? No one ever shakes me up like this.
He grinned wider and said, "I know. I was just giving you a hard time."
"I'll be out of your way in a minute," I replied, trying to remember what the heck I was doing. It was hard to concentrate with the gorgeous pilot standing so close behind me and watching my every move.
"Take your time," he replied, as I fumbled around with the terminal. "I'm Carth Onasi by the way, and you are?"
"Skye Avery," I replied without looking at him, my stomach doing flip-flops. He was attracted to me, I could sense that. I don't know how I could, but I've noticed that I'm able to read other people's energy.
"You're Trask Ulgo's bunkmate, aren't you?" he asked. Hmm… very observant.
"You know Trask?" I replied, having to redo the code once again while Carth distracted me.
"He's a good soldier," Carth commented.
"I suppose," I replied. I stood up and announced, "All done. You can have your seat back."
"Thanks," he smiled. He had a subtle charm that made his flirting all the more potent. I nodded and quickly walked away. I could feel his eyes on my back as I made my way through the bridge and back to the corridor beyond. Strangely enough, I also felt the gaze of the Jedi again. I turned my head in her direction before I walked out the door. Sure enough she was looking at me strangely. Maybe I was infringing on her 'territory.' But I had heard that Jedi are not supposed to have romantic attachments. Who knows? Carth is charming enough to make a Jedi break that rule.
I wonder if I have a boyfriend or husband somewhere that I cannot remember. It disturbs me that I could very well run into someone that knows more about me than I do. So far that hasn't happened. I can only remember my recent stay at the military base on Coruscant and now here, on the Endar Spire. I vow that I'm going to write everything down from now on. I can't afford to lose anymore of my past. So, dear journal, you shall be my constant companion.
Day Four, Five and Six
I have suffered another injury to my head, but luckily I seem to have retained my new memories, at least for the parts I was conscious for. I will recount the events to the best of my knowledge thus far.
After my last entry in this data pad, I went to rest up for my next shift when I was awoken by explosions and shaking. I had just sat up in bed, disoriented by the disturbance, when Trask came running in through the door and yelled that we were being ambushed by the Sith battle fleet and were now under attack.
"We have to find Bastila before the Sith do and help her escape," he yelled, frantically. "Get dressed quickly; we need to get to the bridge!"
I wanted to tell him that I only fix things and I would be fairly useless in a battle situation, but it didn't seem appropriate to refuse such an urgent request. Besides, if the Sith really were going to board this ship, I think I'd feel safer standing behind Bastila or one of the other Jedi she had brought with her.
I quickly pulled on my pants and jacket, donned my stealth belt (just in case), and grabbed a short sword I had been given after a brief training session on Coruscant. I threw my meager possessions in my pack, along with you, dear journal. The adrenaline pumping through my body made the whole situation seem surreal. I felt I had to do whatever I could to survive this attack. Trask looked no less nervous. Though he had been a soldier for a few years, I think this was the first time he would be using his skills in real combat, if I was not mistaken.
The lockdown system I had installed was working, and happily, I had the codes to override the doors that were now closed. We made our way out of the room and tried to keep our balance as the ship was hit by more and more laser canons. The poor utility droids were frantically trying to patch the ship, despite the chaos surrounding them.
As we left the room, Carth Onasi's voice could be heard on our wrist communicators. He gave a general order for all hands to head to the bridge to protect Bastila.
"Things must be bad if Carth Onasi is worried," Trask says. This did not make me feel any better. As we opened the door to the main corridor, our worst fears were realized. Not only was the ship smoking and collapsing in various places, but an advanced boarding party of Sith was before us, having a shoot out with Republic soldiers and adding their bodies to the many others already lying about from the explosions.
There was no turning back now that the Sith soldiers had spotted us. Trask yelled, "For the Republic!" and barreled ahead with his blasters. Something kicked in for me at that moment. It must have been the do or die situation, for I charged ahead with my sword and began to hack into the Sith soldier regardless of the laser blasts stinging my body. When he fell, I stood over him, realizing I had just killed someone. Trask took down the soldier he had battled and killed next to me. Then our eyes met in understanding and for some reason… I smiled.
I had just killed someone, and it seemed natural to me. But I had no time to reflect much on this as Trask grabbed my arm and said, "Let's go."
We ran into a storeroom which was currently occupied by two Sith soldiers scavenging the dead bodies of Republic soldiers that they had no doubt just killed. My anger was fueled by the fact that some of the dead were my newly made friends, and the violation of their personal belongings was too much for me. I charged ahead as Trask provided cover with his blaster and I hacked into the nearest Sith. Again, it was smooth and easy, and strangely… natural. When I finished with him, I ran straight over and finished off the other one Trask had been shooting at.
"Are you all right?" Trask asked, noticing my heaving breathing and seeming zeal for what I had just done. Did he sense my secret thrill, this blood lust that was quickly taking me over?
"Yeah," I said. "Let's just load up."
We grabbed some grenades from the supply container and I came across a combat suit and a longer sword which I quickly substituted for my current attire. I suppose I was truly a soldier now. Why not look like one?
When we left the supply room, we entered a big battle between Sith and Republic soldiers in the corridor and we waited a moment, out of sight, while deciding what to do.
Unfortunately, the explosions from the outside attack were bringing down some of our guys and the Sith now had them outnumbered. Trask and I decided to use our grenades in a surprise attack and managed to take down three of them with one toss. Two more came running for us and we battled them as we had the others. I fought them with my new blade, sensing their moves before they performed them, until they were dead. I really did seem to have a knack for this.
We looked upon all the carnage around us. So many dead or dying, we didn't even have time to help anyone. The ship was falling apart around us and the only thing we could focus on was our goal of reaching the bridge and the ever precious Jedi, Bastila.
Behind the next door, the sound of lightsabers could be heard. Trask and I hesitated before carefully opening the door. It wasn't Bastila. It was one of the Jedi she had brought along with her, and she was fighting an imposing Dark Jedi. Trask hissed at me to keep still and not interfere. We felt heartened to see the Dark Jedi get struck down, only to be disappointed when an explosion killed the Republic's Jedi from behind.
Two Sith soldiers ran up to the bodies and stood before the door of the Bridge. We had no option but to attack them. No one was going to come between us and our goal at that point. It was do or die. They didn't expect us to be there, so we took advantage of their surprise and overpowered them easily.
When we opened the door to the bridge, we noticed it was infested with Sith. Two ran at us straightaway and we killed them as we had grown accustomed to doing. The rest were killed by a combination of our forces and the explosions of the attack from outside. Bastila was nowhere to be seen and Trask guessed she had probably made her way to the escape pods by now and that we should do the same if we wanted to live. There was no argument from me on that point.
We tried to ignore the dead bodies that lay strewn in our path as we made our way across the bridge to the starboard section of the ship. Fighter ships were zooming by the cockpit windows, shooting at the Endar Spire and sending us tilting sideways. Ahead we could see a planet, Taris I suppose.
As we entered the starboard section, we were stopped by the sight of a Dark Jedi standing at the end of the next room, looking at us calmly. But we know he was anything but calm and he meant to end our lives, as he had the countless others lying about the floor. Then Trask does something I never thought he would, something I'll never forget.
He turned to me and said, "You get to the escape pod. I'll hold him off." And before I could stop him, he ran toward the Dark Jedi.
"NO!" I yelled. But Trask paid no heed. He shut the door behind him to give me more time to flee. Why did he do this? Wouldn't we have had a better chance if we fought him together? But in reality, I knew we both would have died. I can't think of the sacrifice Trask made for me now. It strikes me deeply that someone who barely knew me more than a week would give his life to save mine. I'm humbled by his courage and saddened at the loss. Too many good people have died this day.
Carth's voice came over my wrist communicator again and this time he addressed me personally. He said he'd been tracking my position through the Endar Spire's life support systems, and that I'm the last surviving crew member on board. I suppose that answered my question of whether or not Trask still lived, though the thought fueled my anger against the Sith even more.
Carth went on to say that Bastila's escape pod had already left and that I should come as soon as possible as he would not be able to wait much longer for me. He warned me that there were more Sith up ahead and to be careful.
I knew without Trask by my side, I would have to be more cautious, so I flipped on my stealth belt. Sneaking was something I'm very good at. I suppose it was a skill that helped me in my previous smuggling occupation.
I entered the hall quietly and saw only one Sith soldier standing guard among the wreckage. I could have just passed him by, and made my way into the next room, but I was so angry at the sight of my fellow crewmembers dead on the floor, and the thought of poor Trask cut down by that Dark Jedi, that I snuck behind the Sith soldier and struck him down from behind. You would think killing someone in this manner would be considered cowardly, but I assure you, in that moment, I couldn't care less as long as the slime was dead.
I approached the next closed door in stealth mode as well, having been encouraged by my last success. There were two Sith soldiers in this room and they looked about to see what had opened the door. I walked straight up to one and sliced deep into his throat between his breastplate and helmet. He didn't stand a chance. Now exposed, however, the other soldier began to fire at me, so I ran about the center table and struck him as he slipped on the blood of his fallen comrade. I was surprised by my seeming skill with the blade. Perhaps I had seen battle before? I wish I could remember.
Carth's voice came back on my communicator, and warned me that a whole squadron of Sith were in the next room and I may want to find a way to thin their numbers a bit. Looking about, I found some repair parts and rigged up a disabled battle droid, reactivating its shields and its weapons, and sent it on its merry way. This is one of the perks of having good repair abilities. The droid entered the next room while I hid safely behind the door and he killed everyone for me. I wish I had found that droid earlier. But then, it would have taken a certain satisfaction away from my need for revenge.
When I entered the room, all were dead including the squad leader, who happened to have a very nice prototype vibroblade that he would no longer need.
The next room was my destination. There stood that handsome pilot, Carth Onasi, looking very pleased that I had made it alive. I was pleased as well. We scuttled into the last remaining escape pod and launched toward the planet below. I remember the rumbling and the shaking of the pod, even though we were strapped in tight. But that is the last thing I remembered about that day. The impact of the pod striking Taris had caused me to hit my head and fall unconscious.
For the next two days I was recovering from my head trauma, dreaming strange dreams and mumbling in my sleep (so Carth says).
I awoke a few hours ago, completely disoriented. Carth was here and he explained that we were in an abandoned apartment in the Upper City of Taris. He had dragged me away from the crashed escape pod before the Sith could arrive and then he found this place for us to hide in. Apparently, I have been falling in and out of consciousness for a few days and thrashing about in my sleep.
"Thanks for saving me," I told him. I looked about the apartment. It wasn't much, but it would have to do. I was pleased to see a workbench on one side of the room and I was itching to tinker with that prototype vibroblade I had found. But there were so many other things to discuss.
"I've never left anyone behind if I could help it," Carth said. "Besides, I need your help if we are to find Bastila and get off this planet."
I was reminded of Trask, who also thought Bastila was so important and worth risking ones life for. But then, Trask also gave his life for me. What caused such selfless devotion in people? Did I possess such a quality?
He began to explain our current situation. The Sith had taken control of Taris and were patrolling the streets outside. "But I think we'll be able to move around unnoticed," he added. "No one's looking for us. Bastila won't have that luxury." He had already scouted about while I was recovering and filled me in on the current state of the city.
He explained that the Sith had imposed a quarantine, not allowing people to move freely between the three levels of Taris. The top level, the Upper City, was where the planet's wealthiest lived. The Lower City contained warring swoop gangs, and the Under City was rife with some sort of dangerous creatures called Rakghouls. Unfortunately Carth thinks that Bastila's escape pod was one of the ones reported to have landed in the Under City. How we were suppose to get there to check it out was anyone's guess.
Then to make matters worse, Carth also said the Sith have blockaded the planet and are stopping all ships from leaving.
It seems we are effectively stuck! I sat back down on my bed and accepted some food that Carth had brought. I then asked him why Bastila was so important and if he really thought she was still alive. What if those Rakghouls already got her?
"Bastila's important to the Republic's war efforts. She has a rare skill called Battle Meditation that can encourage the will of large groups of people to fight on or to feel hopeless and give up," he explained. "She was with the strike team that killed Darth Revan and won a key battle for the Republic. Unfortunately, Malak, her apprentice, got away and has now taken Revan's place as Lord of the Sith. I think he knows that Bastila is now on Taris and the Sith will be looking for her relentlessly. We need to find her first."
"How do you know they haven't got her already?" I asked.
"I've been hanging out at the local cantina and listening to gossip. Off duty Sith go there as well," Carth explained. "So far the talk has been that they are still searching for survivors and that none have yet been found."
It's obvious to me that Carth wants to get going and he's been waiting impatiently for me to recover and find this Jedi. He paced around the room while I ate and I asked him to tell me more about Revan and Malak.
He explained that Revan and Malak were once Jedi. But they were young and headstrong and went against the wishes of the council when they decided to help the Republic fight against the Mandalorians in the Outer Rim. They were victorious, however. Then something happened out there that changed them. No one really knows what it was, but Revan and Malak became corrupted by the Dark Side. They recruited ex-Jedi that had fallen to the Dark Side. They also gathered ex-Republic soldiers who had fought for them during the Mandalorian wars and made them into the next generation of Sith, turning them against the people who they had always protected.
Carth then became very moody as he mentioned his home world was one of the first to be attacked by the Sith. They devastated the planet with their battleships.
"I'm sorry, Carth," I said. "That must have been very difficult for you."
"I really don't want to talk about it," he snapped. "I don't really talk about it with anyone. I prefer action to words."
It's strange, but I think Carth is angry at himself for some reason. He spoke as if he was to blame for what happened to his planet. I decided not to ask him anymore questions for awhile, at least until he seems more receptive to talk. He does intrigue me, however. He's a mystery to unravel and not a bad looking one at that.
I wonder what kinds of things I muttered in my sleep out loud, hopefully nothing too embarrassing. I only remember one of my dreams. It was a dream of Bastila and she was fighting a Dark Jedi. Why I dreamed that, I couldn't say. Perhaps the image of the Jedi fighting on board of the Endar Spire affected me deeply. Perhaps the image of Trask sacrificing himself for me, triggered some sort of revenge scenario.
Trask. I'll never forget the face of that cold Dark Jedi standing there like the Sentinel of Death. So many were lost and only a handful of us made it out. Maybe Carth and I are the only ones living to tell the tale. Well, I suppose if I have to be stuck on a planet with someone, then Carth definitely wasn't so bad a choice.
I finished eating and we headed out of the apartment for a look around. It seemed we were the only humans in this apartment wing as the rest were all aliens that we came upon. One positive thing that had not been affected by my memory loss, was that I hadn't lost my language abilities. I know many different alien languages; but where I learned them, I cannot say. I suppose they came in handy as a smuggler.
Carth showed me the wreckage of our escape pod that landed in the Upper City. Some droids were doing an analysis on it. There were too many Sith walking around and the Upper City citizens seemed to stare at us in distaste. I soon grew tired and asked Carth if we could continue our search in the morning after a good night's rest.
He reluctantly agreed. His moodiness and impatience made me smile to myself for some reason.
Day Seven
Carth woke me bright and early this morning, eager to be heading off. After a quick breakfast, we counted how many credits we had between us and the figure came to 257.
"We need to find a way to earn some extra credits," I told him. Somehow I got the feeling we just may be here awhile. Carth promised to keep his ears open for any opportunities and we were off.
Our plan of action was to start questioning everyone about the fate of the escape pods. Perhaps someone, somewhere, would know something that could set us on the right trail.
As soon as we stepped out of our apartment, we witnessed a Sith officer with two battle droids hassling two Duros. They announced they were doing a raid on the apartments. That was definitely something Carth and I didn't want! When the officer shot down one of the Duros, Carth and I knew we couldn't stand by and let him continue.
We made short work of the officer and his droids to the relief of the remaining Duros. He thanked us for helping him and promised to move the bodies to a different location so the Sith could not blame the apartment residents.
A Twi'lek merchant by the name of Larrim saw what had happened, and explained that the illegal aliens in this apartment block were discriminated against and most of them were not allowed to walk the streets of the Upper City. It bothered me that in this day and age there was still so much intolerance for other species. I happen to find all cultures fascinating. Perhaps that is why I learned so many different languages. Even Larrim said he couldn't answer any of our questions, because it would be bad for his business if other aliens saw him speaking to humans.
We took a look at the items in his kiosk. He tried to sell us an energy shield, but Carth and I couldn't spend any credits just yet. We needed to eat, after all. But there was a very nice Sound Dampening Stealth Unit that caught my eye. Too bad we were so poor.
None of the aliens walking around this apartment block wanted to speak with us, it seemed.
"We really need to check out the apartments," I reminded Carth. "What if there are other soldiers like us hiding out? Maybe Bastila could here."
He agreed, even though we both felt a bit like thugs as we picked open locked doors and apologized to the aliens within who were frightened. We gave the excuse that we were searching for someone.
The apartment next to ours contained a human woman named Dia. After her initial scolding at our forced entry, we struck up an interesting conversation with her. Apparently she was hiding out here because there was a bounty put on her head. With some coaxing, she decided to trust us and told us her story.
She was a nice woman and we spent a good part of the morning chatting with her about her plight. A man named Holdan had put the bounty on her because she had cut him with her vibroblade when she refused his drunken advances. We were appalled that he was allowed to put a bounty on her for that, but she explained he worked for Davik, the local crime boss, and hence he could get away with it. It seemed that the Sith weren't the only ones running things on Taris.
We promised to help her if we could find this Holdan and speak to him. Dia was a nice woman and didn't deserve this in the least. Dia and I started to chat about the injustices towards women from men like Holdan and I knew Carth was becoming impatient to be off again. Perhaps he was not enjoying the bit of venting Dia was doing towards the male sex. For some reason, I found myself enjoying his discomfort immensely. Am I cruel?
"I don't know if you should be promising to help that woman out when we have more pressing matters to see to," Carth said as we left Dia's apartment.
"What would it hurt to talk to this Holdan fellow if we ran into him? I just feel bad that she's stuck in a little apartment waiting for someone to come and kill her."
"Yeah, I guess that's pretty sad," Carth agreed. Then he said, "Look up ahead, another human in this place."
We approached an old man who was cleaning the floors and he introduced himself as Kadir, the janitor. He assumed we were spacers, stuck here because of the quarantine. Well, at least he was half right. He didn't seem to know much as he explained that he hardly got out these days and directed us to the cantina where he told us we'd probably have better luck finding information.
Carth and I decided that the old guy was probably right. A cantina would be a good place to gather information. After a few drinks, most people seem willing to talk more than they usually do. Perhaps even Carth could loosen up more and tell me about himself.
"Come on," I urged Carth. "Let's go mingle with the locals."
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