Are we too broken to be fixed?
"Blaine?"
He walked away. His shoulders were slumped and his tie disgustingly undone.
"Blaine!"
I am not wrong. He's the one who got drunk; it's not my fault.
Faint music hummed in the background as Kurt sat and just thought.
He should know, I told him, I told him.
Someone came walking out of the bar.
He should've known.
He had long brown hair. A crinkly smile. A devious look.
This is not fair.
He approached. He wasn't swaying, which is what first tipped Kurt off.
Fuck Taylor Lautner. I want Blaine.
For a second he could almost transform before his eyes; he saw Blaine's translucent eyes, tinged with drunkenness; his slighted mouth, slack with shock; his tan face and strong jaw. But as quickly as he was there, he was gone again. As soon as Kurt began to feel himself unravel, he put himself together again. There was… Sebastian.
"Sebastian!" He threw a sharp look his way. Get out.
"Hello, Kurt. And what brings you here this fine day without a certain Blaine Anderson by your side?"
Kurt suddenly sat up, wiped his tear stained eyes.
"At your suggestion, with your little revelation of your findings here. And where is the love of your life? Hmm? Replaced you with another trashy throwaway?"
"Whoa, calm down bitch supreme. Like I said before, live a little."
"What exactly do you think you're doing, Sebastian?"
"What do you think I'm doing?" Sebastian was leering extremely offensively.
"Listen, Blaine is mine." He stared hard eyes into his, willing him to just understand this one thing. "I don't care if you usually get what you want, acting like a delinquent and getting drunk so frequently that it doesn't affect you anymore, but it's not going to work this time. Blaine is mine, and he would never go for a guy-"
"Have you ever thought," Sebastian cut him off, "about why you don't get any action?"
"What- how- I don't- how?"
Sebastian jacked the car door open, leaned in and forced his putrid breath onto Kurt's face. "You are the most obvious virgin I have ever seen. However, your equally as oblivious counterpart has potential."
"Get your rancid breath out of my face!"
"-and he's better looking. Face the music, Hummel, you look like a girl. How do you expect Blainers, sweet innocent Blainers, to give it to you when he's probably just too nice to deny you?"
His shrill voice broke. "Dammit, Sebastian, you don't get it."
Sebastian laughed, a hard, naive laugh.
"No, you don't get it."
Kurt swiveled forward, matching Sebastian's proximity with some of his own.
"Blaine is the sweetest person in the world, that's true. But I know things about him that you will never know. He's not as innocent as you think he is. And you will never know what it's like to have Blaine all up in your space, like he just was in mine."
Sebastian's cynical eyes broke down for a second, but they were back up to their sneering demeanor in less than a second.
"Have you ever thought that you are too broken to be fixed?"
Sebastian walked away, spying another dead beat straggle out of the bar and smoothly putting an arm around him.
Kurt pounded his wheel. "Dammit!"
Kurt walked cautiously into Dalton Academy. It had been so long since he had set foot in the great marble halls, and frankly, the majesty of it all frightened him. He wasn't used to grandeur and splendor, where it took the calculated subtlety of a small movement to be heard; he was used to full out, intense flailing, just to be body slammed into anonymity again. Or worse, the infamous recognition the New Directions received which meant daily slushie facials. Here it was strangely muted; he felt like even a whisper would disturb the delicate balance of prep and posture.
Which was why Sebastian stuck out like a sore thumb.
There he was, as irking and obnoxious as ever. He currently was looking at a new Warbler with straggly blond hair but a sweet face. The new Warbler was a baritone, the most common singing voice. Just another pea in Sebastian's pod, Kurt thought.
He was about to witness Sebastian put his moves on this new Warbler when a familiar hand tapped him on the shoulder.
"Kurt?"
He turned around.
"Trent? Why aren't you with the other Warblers; it looks like they're having some type of meeting." He said this still carefully observing and mentally documenting every move that Sebastian made.
"I was about to head home actually; I just saw you here and I hadn't seen you in so long…"
Kurt smiled. "I haven't seen you in a while either. So, how is Dalton life without me or Blaine? I bet the Warblers are slowly dying off of boredom… or disgust." He looked pointedly at Sebastian.
"Birth and death; we all move between these two unknowns."
"Where'd you get that?" Kurt jabbed him in the side, "The all inspiring fore-quote to The Warblers Guide to Etiquette: Not Just In the Choir Room, But Out?"
"For your information the book was a steal for the price they were selling it at; there are only 20 copies in existence you know. Not all Warblers are as dedicated as I am to preserving the traditions and upholding the morals, and that includes outside of the school, of our group."
"So it doesn't become like a kangaroo court, right?"
Trent blushed. "You remember that?"
"How could I not remember that? You know, out there in the real world, public school, when we want to say something is ridiculous, we just say it's ridiculous."
He laughed nervously and pulled out a pocket watch. Gold, like Blaine's. "Oh, look at the time, I have to be going! Nice catching up with you, Kurt!"
Kurt waved goodbye amiably for a good ten seconds before he realized what he was doing and was off running.
"Wait, Trent! Can I ask you something?"
He turned around from the middle of the parking lot. "Sure, Kurt." He actually looked a bit nervous,, like he was debating whether or not it was safe to allow Kurt a question.
"Who's the new Warbler? The one with the overly stylized brown hair?"
His eyes shifted. "That's Warbler Sebastian! New addition to the Warblers, great voice. Could be very useful come Sectionals…"
"Are there any Warblers he gets along with particularly well?"
"Well, not any specific Warblers, not that I'm aware of."
Kurt inspected his voice for signs of lying or deception, but found none.
"Alright, thank you Trent! I'll let you get home now."
"Any time, Kurt."
As Trent searched out his car, Kurt turned to find his own. However, he couldn't help but risk one last glance inside Dalton. There he saw Sebastian deep in conversation with the Warbler with the straggly blond hair. The look on the new Warbler's face was too content for Kurt's comfort; he was getting reeled in. He had to warn him about Sebastian. Yet when he finally decided to go back in and somehow warn the poor Warbler, they were both gone, having disappeared inside Dalton's great halls. Maybe this meant he would lay off Blaine. If he was lucky.
But as it so happens, he wasn't lucky. If anything, Sebastian pursued Blaine with more passion than ever after that encounter. To add to that, Kurt didn't even know how to contact the mysterious blond Warbler and warn him of Sebastian's ways. He didn't know why that meant so much to him, but for some reason he had to have it done.
So the following day, Kurt returned to Dalton. This time he didn't even blink an eye at the elaborate chandelier above him or the swell of quiet that swept over him as he entered, he focused on finding the mysterious Warbler, preferably alone, so that he could warn him. That was all he wanted to do, warn him.
He walked throughout the halls, looking absentmindedly around him at the elegant paintings and distastefully documenting that the paint jobs on the wall were all wrong; there was a way to achieve tradition and beauty at the same time, and this color just was not it. He kept a vigil eye out for the Warblers practice room though, hoping to catch the Warbler leaving and pull him aside.
He ended up passing the practice room, but he did end up finding the Warbler-who just happened to be with Sebastian.
"Kurt!" Sebastian called out, "What brings you here this fine day without a certain Blaine Anderson at your side?"
He pasted on the sickly sweetness to his voice. "Oh, Sebastian, just taking a stroll down memory lane."
"Must not have been so pleasant memories if this is the first time you've been back to Dalton since you left a year ago."
Kurt smiled, a It's illegal to kill you right now but if I could I would and toss you in a lake where you'll be devoured by sharks and brutally torn to death but haha, no worries smile.
Sebastian parried it with a I'm not afraid to break the law smile.
The other Warbler broke into their battle of hostile smiles.
"Hi, I'm Adrian. You are?"
Kurt held out his hand cordially. "I'm Kurt."
"Nice to meet you, Kurt."
Kurt directed his attention to Sebastian again. "What are you two doing here?"
"We were just tidying up some Warbler business. But I've really got to be going anyways; I've got places to go, people to see! I don't suppose that you have plans tonight?"
He smiled even wider. "I do happen to, actual-"
"Come on Adrian, we really better be going." Sebastian cut in.
But the look on Adrian's face was desolate at the thought of leaving. "Wait, Sebastian. Kurt, is it true that you know Blaine Anderson?"
Kurt caught Sebastian scowling in his peripheral vision.
"Why yes," Kurt exclaimed, "I do happen to know him. In fact, I know him very well. Why, dear Adrian?"
"Blaine happens to be, like, Warbler legend around here. He's almost as high up there as Junior Warbler Ricardo of 18-"
"Would you like to meet him?"
"Meet him? Uh, yes."
"Excellent. I don't think my boyfriend will mind meeting someone new at all. Give me your number and I'll text you?"
"Boyfriend?" Adrian gave Sebastian a look that Kurt would have liked to say was violent and full of distrust, but to his surprise was rather colored with sympathy.
"Yes, boyfriend." He flicked his eyes between Sebastian and himself and gave a subtle head shake. I don't know what he's telling you, but he's lying. Don't listen to him.
"Oh-kay," he replied with a drawn out lilt to his voice. "I can do that."
Kurt pulled out a purple felt pen and copied Adrian's number to his hand.
"And if you two can excuse me, I must be going. "Toodaloo Adrian," a brush of his hand haughtily across his jacket, "and Sebastian."
The days were dwindling down until McKinley's production of West Side Story; props were being hauled into the auditorium; actors and actresses could be seen humming their songs below their breath in the halls; fittings were ongoing- Artie had to have every actor in the most precise costumes available. Yet, Kurt hadn't caught the pre-performance spirit. Instead of focusing on body language, facial expressions, and speaking nuances, his mind kept sticking on Blaine, and Blaine, and Blaine. He could still smell his rancid breath, hot on his lips, his warm body below his, and then his face, God, his face, when he had been denied. They had been avoiding each other at practice, and they no longer came home everyday to Blaine's house to just be with each other anymore. They drove home separately and barely made contact. This had been wearing down on Kurt, and between his mission of warning Adrian about Sebastian and the musical, he did little but think about Blaine. He was sure that if he didn't make up with Blaine soon, he would internally implode, but at the same time, this was their first fight as a couple, and he didn't know if that was the right way to be going about things. All he knew is that he wanted Blaine back.
He saw him studiously listening to Rachel as she chattered on about NYADA and quelled his nerves.
Thankfully, although him and Rachel were still not on speaking terms (who even contemplates running against their friend in such a backhanded, impulsive way in an election that could mean the fulfillment of his dream to him, and not even leaving out the fact that she already had hers pretty much set in stone?), she seemed to understand what Kurt wanted to do and left, telling Blaine that she was off to check for a response from Patti Lupone.
"With her approval, and there is no doubt that once she discovers my talent by my numerous and strategically placed videos all over the internet, there will be no way they can deny me from NYADA," she said smartly before slipping outside of the auditorium. Blaine laughed disbelievedly and then turned around.
"Ku-Kurt! What are you- never mind, of course I know why you're here. Um, Kurt! Hi." Kurt hated watching him be so nervous. The way he felt was so obvious just by his body movements. He was scared.
"Aren't you happy I saved you from another several hours of talk of Patti Lupone and college applications?" They still stood at a casual distance away from each other, Kurt nonchalantly swaying and Blaine staring with an unhidden disbelief in his eyes.
"Kurt," he began, his voice trembling thinly in only a way Kurt could notice. "Kurt."
He walked forward, probing with his eyes for acceptance. Kurt gave a small smile when he stopped a few inches away from Kurt.
"Kurt, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I didn't do this sooner, I'm sorry that I was drunk and stupid and such an idiot at the bar, and I promise I'll never let anything like that happen again."
He still stood there, but Kurt could tell from his eyes that he wanted to be with him, next to him, connected to him again.
Kurt grabbed both of Blaine's hands, which were a little clammy, and pulled him closer.
"And I'm sorry," he began in a whisper, feather soft against Blaine's ear, "that I never talked to you earlier. I shouldn't have been so uptight, you were just trying to be what I said I had wanted, but then I went and lost it at you."
Blaine sighed, content now that he was against Kurt's warm skin again.
"I never know how to say to you how I feel. I say 'I've been looking for you forever', 'You move me', 'You always zig when I think you're going to zag', but that's not enough. I don't ever want to lose you, Kurt; I hope you know that."
Kurt watched his eyes become clouded.
"I was so close to losing you, Kurt, and I just couldn't- I just couldn't make myself go back and get you again because I always knew this was going to happen. I knew I would lose you someday."
"You will never lose me," Kurt inserted aggressively. "When I said 'I'm never saying goodbye to you', I meant it."
In the dead quiet of the auditorium, they kissed…. and kissed… and kissed, like the past week had never happened; it had been wiped from existence.
When they pulled apart, they were whole again.
Blaine laughed. "I hope you're convinced now that Sebastian means nothing to me."
Kurt gave him a crinkled smile. "I know. But I've been seeing him around Dalton with another new Warbler, and I'm worried he'll get hurt by Sebastian."
"Why were you at Dalton?" He suppressed a knowing smiling.
"Uh… no reason. For old time's sake."
"Right," Blaine agreed mockingly. "Then do you happen to know the name of the new Warbler he was with?"
"Adrian. By the way, he is expecting a meeting with you sometime, my fault! Humor him though? He seems so nice."
"Adrian? You do know that he is the brother of Sebastian…" Blaine trailed off.
He stuttered. "Bro-bro-brother? No, you must be thinking of the wrong one."
"No, I think the only new Warbler other than Sebastian is Adrian, and they're brothers."
He was still sputtering. "But that's impossible! They look nothing alike!" But throughout this, he was starting to put things together, including that Adrian clearly admired his brother. There had to be something more to Sebastian then…
"Same deal with you and Finn being brothers. Sebastian doesn't have a father, and Adrian doesn't have a mother. But then their parents met, and they fell in love," with the world love he threw Kurt a content glance, "and they married."
"Are we too broken to be fixed," Kurt muttered under his breath. "Oh."
"What?" Blaine asked, having heard Kurt.
"The night when we were at the bar, I hadn't left by the time Sebastian came out. He came and long story short, eventually ended up asking me if 'we were too broken to be fixed'."
"It makes sense now, Blaine. I think the reason he pursues you so aggressively is because he, he thinks he himself is broken. And with your reputation, I'm not so surprised that he thinks you can fix him. He just wants to get to you so he can fix himself."
"And he can't do it any other way than gross forwardness?" Blaine asked skeptically.
"I don't think he knows any other way," Kurt amended. "And I think that the other Warblers know too. Because when I ask about him, they were always hesitant to answer much. They're trying to protect him like they tried to protect me…"
"So what are we going to do?" Blaine asked.
Kurt sighed. "I don't know."
He pulled Blaine closer again and rested his head on his shoulder.
"But I do know this," he said against his body, "if we can't fix him, he can't break us."