I'm Right Here
Chapter 1
The Return
Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha or any of the respective characters. Although I don't think I need a disclaimer because this is a FANfiction site so no one on here owns the characters. So this goes for every other chapter because I'm not writing it again.
One day. I knew that one day I would meet up with my past. My not so distant but so long ago, past. Every day I would stay in my bed for hours, dreaming and scheming. I knew. There was a way. Even if it had alluded me thus far. Even though all evidence pointed to the contrary. I knew that I would find myself back in the feudal era, united with the strings of a life once lived. The only thing I didn't know was that who I was going to be united with would be so unlike what I'd imagined. As I sat there frumpled in the grass, staring into the bulging green eyes of an imp not really worth mentioning, dread, excitement, confusion, and fear overtook my body in an emotional war so fierce that I passed out.
"Kagome, you know that it's ok, right? We'll all be perfectly fine without you." Inuyasha stood before me with his hands on his hips. His fangs were bared and his sneer of comfort was anything but.
I sat on the lip of the well.
It had been two months since the jewel had been destroyed. Two months since I had lost all confidence in my ability to return home. I had never been able to travel through time without it. I knew, no matter how much Inuyasha tried to convince me that I'd be ok, I knew it was futile. There was no way I'd return. Actually, I was pretty sure that I would get home. I knew it. But even but I was even more certain that afterwards I wouldn't get another chance to come back.
My job was done. I had no more purpose for existing in a time before my existence. My scar on Inuyasha's soul would remain just that-a semblance of remembered regret and secrets shared. I was only an event. A note in time. A lonely soul picked out of billions at random to save the past. To make way for the future.
I smiled up at him. He was still standing, awkwardly wishing me his best.
"Oh, Inuyasha. You know, I really did love you."
His cheeks flushed as he looked away, his arms folded across his chest. "Keh, even I know that. We all love you too. It's what friends are for."
I ignored the pang. His naiveté was our undoing. How could I ever be with someone too dense to even realize that my feelings were so much more than friendship? At least he refused to acknowledge it.
"You were always so honest weren't you?" I asked, standing up and placing a hand on his shoulder.
He turned to face me and I saw how his face softened. "Well, you're so. You're so…"
I was hopeful for a moment, but soon his bashfulness took over.
"You're so damn nice! Who wouldn't be?" he said matter-of-factly. His ears were red, but that was the only visible stain to show that he was trying to be nice.
"I'm ok. But hey," I straightened up feigning chipperness, "I have to go home. My mom's probably worried sick. I haven't seen her in four months!"
"Kagome…"
"But I don't think she'll give me a talking to. Hopefully she'll just be happy to see me."
"Kagome…"
I turned around, my arms upturned in a shrug. "I mean, after all these years she'll gotten pretty used to-"
"Kagome!"
I stopped and turned to face him. His eyes were shut and he grasped my shoulders so tight that I thought his claws would stab me any moment.
"Y-yes?"
"You're not coming back are you?" The way he spoke, so soft, so caring. It broke my heart all over again.
I felt myself tense up and knew he could feel it too. Sense my stress. And probably smell it too. "No."
His arms dropped to his sides, eyes still downcast.
"I already said goodbye to Sango and Miroku. I decided to wait until after their wedding to leave. I really wanted to be there. I saw Shippo too, that's pretty much why he went to stay with his uncle."
About a year ago we had run into a fox demon family. It turned out to be Shippo's actual Uncle. Who would've thought he had living relatives? His father and Uncle had a falling out about seventy-five years ago, they were estranged. But I guess Lo-ji didn't hold it against little Shippo. And he felt personally responsible for not being there for his family.
I looked up at Inuyasha again. His eyes were so full of emotion that I couldn't stand it. I looked away. A few silent minutes passed. I could hear him breathing. From the corner of my eye I could see the pained rise and fall of his broad chest. I wanted to grab a hold of his haori and press my face into the rugged fabric of the firerat. I wanted to melt into his body and never leave, ever-pressed to be with him forever. Just as I was going to lose control of myself and renounce my family to be with him, Inuyasha spoke.
"Well then. You better be off. No since prolonging the unavailable."
I had to laugh, "Inevitable?""
He looked abashed. "That's what I said."
I would miss that about him. "Sure, Inuyasha."
After a little bit of a mental debate I flung my arms around his neck, feeling as he first stiffened then embraced me. I imagined that he did it tenderly. He smelled the same. Like nature. Not the stinky Tokyo outside kind of 'nature', but the feudal kind. It was such a fresh scent, flowers and trees, fields of endless grass penetrated by sun and cool breezes. You'd think they had deodorant in that time.
After sufficiently absorbing as much of him as I could, I let him go. I stepped back without another word. And without hesitating, perched myself over the edge of the well and jumped in. The last thing I saw was the shimmering amber eyes of a man grief stricken, staring after me as the blue, black, and purple void swallowed me up and sent me home.
Pain.
A hot jab to my ribs.
Again.
It hurt.
I reached out my right arm to grab whatever it was that was constantly jabbing me in my side. When I caught hold I yanked, hard, and heard an unmistakable voice squawking annoyingly over my head.
"Insolent wench! Crazy human girl! Pops out of the air then passes out of top of me! I've never—" He yelled some more and I couldn't help felt slightly nauseated that I was on top of that thing.
Opening my eyes and sitting up, I winced. "Ow." I put a hand to my head where I must have hit it when I fell on it in my arrival, then after righting myself, passed out on it again.
"It hurts?! Well look at this!"
I saw that he had a huge knot on his head.
"Oh yes wench! You did this, with that hard head of yours!"
I just stared at him for a minute, completely flabbergasted that I was even there. How? How had it happened? I hadn't even tried to jump in the well. I was minding my own business in the comfort of my own living room when I was suddenly lifted from the couch and thrown into a familiar void of blue, black, and purple lights, before dropping out of the sky onto my head in the middle of a field of flowers. In the middle of the past. And worse, Jaken was my welcoming party.
"Why are you here?" I could hear myself speak. Wait. What?
"Why am I?" He sputtered. "I'm here performing a ritual and you…YOU!!!!! are who shows up. No no no no no! You are not who I asked for. This is awful. Awful." He threw himself down on the grass sputtering and screaming curses at me and the Kami and at trees and other random things that I was sure did him no harm.
"What ritual?" I thought to ask.
Jaken abruptly stopped crying. His waterworks practically halting in mid-air. "What ritual? It is of no consequence to you so mind your own business!" he righted himself and stormed off, muttering words like "stupid human", "ditzy", "wretched," and "lie."
I looked around and noticed that no one was near. He was my only link to survival. Apparently he was the one who brought me here and he was going to tell me why and then fix it.
I was terrified. I knew that there was only one place that he would lead me to, and I was dreading the reunion.