TITLE: Too late…?
AUTHOR: Anika sleeplessdreamer42@hotmail.com
CATEGORY: Carter/Lucy romance, drama, character death
RATING: Oh, I was always bad at that… PG, maybe PG-13?
TIMELINE: In between All in the family and afterwards. Oh, I changed the events a little… I couldn't remember the dialogues so I made them up!
SUMMARY: Lucy lives a little longer…
NOTES: This is my very first ER fic so please be gentle! I am actually a Carby, well and a Cordano and a Susan/Luka shipper but I decided to give that couple (that never really existed) my first ER fic try. Hope some of you like it!
Carter's eyes flickered. As if from far away he heard voices. His eyes were still closed. He could only hear them. There was Peter Benton, there was Abby… there were so many people. There was the pain. It was everywhere. Carter opened his eyes. Even that hurt. Why was he hurt so much?
"Carter!" he looked into Abby's eyes. She looked so concerned. And Peter. Even he looked worried.
"Lucy…" he whispered.
"She is in the next room… don't close your eyes again!" Peter was as demanding as always. Carter would have loved to smile. There was nothing funny though… oh, Lucy… He couldn't change it, he had to close his eyes again… Carter drifted away…
No, Dr.John Carter and med student Lucy Knight had never really gotten along. Oh, how they had always fought! Sometimes it had been so stupid. But it wasn't that they didn't like each other. Oh no… there was so much chemistry, so much attraction. Only once it had almost happened… in that examining room… that had been one hell of a kiss! Carter had stopped just in time. Of course, he had wanted her. But he couldn't. They just couldn't…
Carter felt like loosing her. He had never told her about his feelings for her. How he regretted it now. She needed to know. If only he could open his eyes again…
"Carter, stay with us now." It was Mark Greene.
"How," Carter needed all his strength, " is Lucy?"
"She is stable for now." Abby told him, gently stroking his forehead.
"Hurts." Carter whispered. Never had he felt such immense pain. He rolled his head. There she was… he could see her. She was too far away from him. Were her eyes open or closed? He wanted to see her. He needed to tell her.
"Have to tell her." He said.
"We have to take you to the OP." Benton said.
"No," Carter felt a wave of pain going through him, "need to tell her first."
His wish was ignored, he was brought into the OP. He could hear Benton telling him something. Carter couldn't tell what though. He needed to be with Lucy. Shortly afterwards, the world became black again.
When Carter awoke, he felt exhausted but the pain was gone. His eyes opened slowly. The room he was in, was dimmed. What time was it? His throat was a little dry. He wondered if he could get water. Benton entered.
"How are you feeling?" he asked. He looked exhausted as well.
"Where is Lucy?" Carter didn't care for himself but for her.
"She is asleep."
"Is she going to make it?" It was the most important thing.
"We-We don't know yet." Benton answered honestly. "You were quiet lucky though." The doctor told him, almost a little smile.
"I need to see her." Carter said.
"Carter, you need to rest."
"No, I need to see her!" he said as loud as possible. There was the pain again. His back hurt like hell. As if the knife was still inside of him… Benton looked a little surprised. He nodded slowly.
Half an hour later, Carter was in a wheelchair on his way to see Lucy. Everything hurt but he needed to see her. Just for the case… the room she lay in was so quite. Shouldn't there be noises around her? Shouldn't someone be there? Why couldn't she get up and smile at him? Why, oh why… Benton left the room. They were alone. Carter felt tears dwell in his eyes. He felt pain. It was pain of seeing her so… hurt. Pain of knowing he was too late. And pain of knowing it was his fault. Sitting in front of her made him realize. Would it have happened if he had been there earlier? If he would have only listened to her. He should have so many times…
"Lucy? Can you hear me?" he said in a whisper. He carefully took his hand. It was warm.
"I can't wait until you wake up. I am not so good with relationship things you know. Lucy, please wake up." She didn't even stir.
"I- I want to be with you, Lucy. I want to wake up next to you in the morning, fall asleep with you in the night. I want- I miss our little fights. Our little, meaningless fights. I love to fight with you but I'd love it more to make it all up to you. Lucy, please open your eyes for me." Carter pleaded but she didn't. He heard the sound of the door. Elizabeth stood next to him.
"You both need to rest." Carter only hesitatingly left. He didn't want to leave Lucy.
Benton brought him back to his room. More he didn't remember. His body demanded rest…
Carter opened his eyes. He wasn't alone in his room. Abby was there. She sat in a chair close to his bed. He couldn't move. It hurt too much. Abby woke up.
"Morning." Carter said.
"Morning. How are you?"
"It hurts." As all he answered. What was he supposed to say?
"I have to tell you-"
"Lucy is dead?" Carter just knew it. Somehow he could tell. Abby looked down.
"Corday and Romano couldn't save her. She died last night. I am sorry, Carter." He turned away from her, to the window. Tears streamed down his face. Through the veil of tears he could see a Valentine heart on the window. Someone must have tried to take it off; one half was ripped off. A broken heart…
END
Ok, it wasn't very good but like I said my first ER fic. I hope you enjoyed it anyway. I liked writing it. I would be thrilled if you guys reviewed!
Written by Anika