Time had passed since their freshman year. Riley and Lucas had gotten together eventually, and a month later, they were happily broken up. The group remained intact, and Riley had blossomed, now that the pressure of the triangle was behind her. And Maya couldn't help but notice.
The thing was, neither of them liked Lucas anymore. They should be fine. They should all be fine. But they weren't fine, and Maya knew why, and she couldn't tell anybody. Every time Riley lay her head on Maya's shoulder, she would pull away, shrinking from the look of hurt in Riley's eyes and climbing out the window.
Maya missed Riley. She missed her in every part of her body. The pain of missing her reached to the ends of her fingertips and seeped out of her in big globs. And Maya knew Riley missed her too.
Really, their whole group was off balance. She hadn't really spoken to Farkle in ages. She kept Lucas at arm's length because she didn't want anybody to get the wrong idea - him or Riley. Smackle had her allegiance to Farkle and Zay to Lucas, and though she was friends with both of them, the less she saw Lucas and Farkle, the less she saw Smackle and Zay. For the first time since Riley had brought these friends to her, Maya was lonely. They all were, she noticed. Maya could stand the suffering of herself, but not of her friends.
So, after school on a Thursday, she was waiting for Riley in their bay window. She fiddled with the buttons on her jacket. She was wearing the faded pink sweater Riley had gotten her once when they were shopping and the black jeans Shawn had bought her back in eighth grade. She wanted to look nice.
After five minutes, Maya was restless, so she grabbed her sketchpad and started drawing. The picture was the silhouettes of two girls. One's head was filled with clouds, the other with stars. Where their lips met, a vivid sunset orange glowed. Maya had been working on it for the past week, and she was filling in the last bit of color as Riley pushed the window open.
"Maya?" She said. "What are you doing here?" Maya grimaced. A year ago, Riley wouldn't have even questioned her presence. But a lot had changed in the past year. Riley sat down next to her, looking at the drawing before Maya could even think to shut the sketchbook.
"Maya," she breathed. "It's beautiful." Maya said nothing, but when the intimacy of Riley's closeness got too overwhelming, she pushed herself to her feet, walking to the edge of Riley's bed and - after taking a breath - turning to face her.
"Maya?" Riley said, concern etched all over her face. "You're scared." Maya nodded, almost laughing. She could still read her so well.
"Terrified," she confirmed. "Riley… I'm in love with you and I'm terrified." She paused, her face contorting into a mess of relief and fear. A few rebellious tears, slid down her face. "But I'm telling you now, because if I don't - Riley, if I don't tell you, then I'll lose you. And I can't lose you," she said, voice catching on the last word and a few distorted sobs escaped her.
Like she watching it happen in slow motion, Maya saw Riley walking towards her and suddenly their lips smashed together. It was sweet and passionate and a little awkward and everything a first kiss should be. When Maya pulled away, she could still taste Riley's cherry lip gloss and she greedily came back for more.
"Maya," Riley started, but Maya cut her off.
"Save it," she whispered, a breathy laugh erupting from her. "You just told me everything I need to know."