Playing the part; Ren Maka.
Its funny how everyone assumes things and takes everything at face value, even the people that seem-and think, they know you the most , or the only ones that know you for that matter, and what's really amazing is that in my case there aren't really that many people who know me, or even know about me. There's just my family really. They're the only ones who really have any memory of me. They all claim to know me but they don't really, they each have their own ideas about who I am, all are wrong. They're simply assumptions on a subject they know nothing about. Of a person that they've all, for one reason or another, managed to let slip trough the cracks of their minds.
But I digress.
My parents don't really know me that well-or at all for that matter, even after I became an adult vampire, its as if they live in their own world. I go out whenever I want to, come home if and when, I want to, chances are I could drag a dead body into the house and they'd go on about their own business. My mother being…well, my mother, and my father being…my father. There really is no other way to describe them.
And then there's my two sisters. I do care about them, despite what people may think. The way I act probably doesn't help. But I assure you if they were in any sort of trouble I'd be if not the first one to find out, the first one to take action-with maybe the exception of my mother, Kami knows the woman will strike first ask questions later should anyone even think about harming her children.
But this isn't about my mother is it. It's about me acting like I have no concern for my sisters well-being when I probably care for them more than I'll care about anyone in my life.
How can I possibly not care about them? I'm their older brother! I don't think it'd be possible for me not to care about them-try as I might.
Suppose I should explain that since stating that I care about my sisters and then saying I try not to makes me seem rather 2-faced.
First there's Anju the youngest and most promising of the clan. It's no mystery that I love that little girl possibly as capable as I am of loving anyone and I should admit she is my favorite. She makes it easy, we think alike even if she's closer to Karin than I could ever be. She doesn't judge me or ignore me but simply accepts me as her brother. We treat each other as equals and that works for me. It certainly helps that she's nothing like Karin.
Then of course there's Karin, our own little family freak-would you believe me if I told you I care about her? That I worry ? That I think about her wellbeing so much it drives me insane?
And the only thing that makes it bearable is that despite it all I still love her.
I can tell you this there was a time when I wasn't so bitter about my little sister. A time when I though we'd be closer than any 2 people can be-after all no one else would remember us after we turned 14.
I remember back when we were younger, how much more closer we were-having parents who were only up once the sun set meant we were pretty much the only company each other had. And knowing( or rather thinking) what was going to happen to us there wasn't really a point in interacting with anyone else-or at least none that I saw. I'd always chalked up my sister's weird behavior to her vampire nature being dormant-or maybe even being her personality. Vampires like people came in all ways after all she wouldn't be the first quirky vamp in the world. Perhaps she'd be the only cheerful creature of the night.
Boy was I wrong. The more time that passed, the more distant we seemed to be from one another. Even before I awakened, it was as if a wall was being build between us and we were helpless to do anything about it. And the more annoyed I became with day walkers, the more Karin seemed to enjoy being around them. The sun never bothered her at all while I was suffering from constant migraines. Maki was now a common subject and she spent as much time in her house as she spent in ours-if not more. I actually felt pretty bad she had to part with a world she was obviously so attached to. Still I couldn't help but await her awakening with something akin to longing . After all my sister belonged with us not with the world of the sun.
But when the day finally came, some thing went very wrong. I remember it clearly, the look of surprise and dread that came over my mother's face when the school called. My father, having a near-meltdown when she told him-taking the caution to take him aside first. I still had no clue as to what was going on and found out from none other than Anju. The sun had trapped us both in the house and putting her advanced control of bats to good use my youngest sister had found out the truth. That Karin was in trouble and that she was being taken to a hospital which would inconvenience not only us but all the vampire families in Japan.
My father-whom at the time I'd just pegged as melodramatic, ran off into broad daylight to rescue his darling daughter. And my mother retired to the common room to await for them without so much as 2 words of explanation.
I suspected Karin the klutz has probably tried to walk in the sun after feeding, gotten some nasty burns which caused concern among the humans and was being dragged back home for punishment for being so careless about our secrecy.
Imagine my surprise when my father crashed in-quite literally, with my little sister in his arms. There was blood on her uniform which I at first assumed to be her victim's but soon understood with horror-struck realization that it belonged to her. Those are the things I remember, the look my father shared with my mother as he handed her Karin, how pale and near-death she looked. How Anju turned away and I finally got enough sense to take her to her room. The house was on a complete standstill. No one knew what was wrong with Karin. No one had ever seen anything like it. She looked like she may not make it and slept for three days straight. And although we all dealt with it and expressed it in different ways and the only one to actually admit it-rather loudly, was my father, we were worried.
And then we finally figured out about Karin's condition. Oh happy day.
As it turns out my sister had a condition-a vampire condition, imagine that. She had too much blood in her system so instead of making her first drink so to speak , she expelled all the blood out. In theory this shouldn't hurt her since she's just getting rid of some extra blood.
We had stopped relying on theories a long time ago.
It hurts her, and we have no other choice but to watch from the shadows, quite literally, as we loose her to the world of mortals-this time for good.
At least she's happy, lost to us but happy. I suppose it's a good thing she likes the world of the day and that she only thinks the worst of me. Because after Anju becomes an adult Karin will be lost to us forever. None of us will see her during the day, she wont wee us during the night. All we can do is hope the human keeps her safe and( at least in my case) think of what to do to him if he doesn't.
She belongs to us but not with us. We've lost her to the day and she will never be one of us. How can I care for her when I can't even be in the same room as her?
How can I protect her if I can't even be near her?
How can I possibly truly be her brother?