Diary Of The General - Part Two


April 24
AC 195
9:34pm

        I have finally returned, as promised. Many things have happened, since the last time I have made an entry. There have been more attacks from those five gundam pilots, the latest one on the Lake Victoria Base where Zechs Merquise is stationed. Thankfully he was not hurt, but many up and coming soldiers died. The worst part of it all is, they had no idea it was going to happen. Nothing could have been done to save their lives.
        For now, all we can do is stay on guard. Those pilots are menaces, and by bringing their gundams into this war, all they have done is create more chaos instead of solutions to the problems.
        Now onto the more interesting topics, which I know will interest you. If you remember, the last time I made an entry, I had gone into great detail about my personal feelings towards another man. I made a promise in that entry, to tell him, namely, Zechs, how I feel. Have I done that yet? The answer, yes and no.
        Yes, because one day, at the usual weekly meeting, when we were just talking, I slipped out a small "I Love You." Of course Zechs looked at me, strangely. I made some kind of pathetic excuse for it, and I think he bought it.
        No, because I wasn't up front with him. After that slip, nothing more. I have been too afraid to tell him. If anything, that slip made me more doubtful than I was originally when it came to telling him.
        My inner struggle has reached a new level. It feels as if my heart is being torn in two directions at once. One side is telling me to be up front with Zechs, and tell him everything I have been hiding inside for so long. The other side is telling me to not tell Zechs, to keep it a secret for even longer.
I wonder, what would people think, if they ever found out, the general of OZ was so deeply in love with one of his younger Lieutenants? I bet that itself would start a war. I don't understand why the citizens in today's world and colonies can't accept the fact that some people are attracted to the same sex. Now I'm not discriminating or anything, don't get me wrong, I just don't understand.
Personally, I have no problem with it, being as I am a man and attracted to another of the same sex. I only wish the people of the Earth and colonies could feel the same way about this issue.
I have strayed off topic again, and for this I am sorry. There really isn't much more to say right now. If I wasn't so worried about being rejected by Zechs, I would tell him everything, how I feel and what I have planned for us in the future. But unfortunately, I am. For now, this is the end, but again, soon... I will return.

Treize Khushrenada