AN./ Totally self-indulgent fluff. Don't like, don't read. I'm just scratching an itch so while I love to hear that people are reading and enjoying what I write, I'm just not interested in criticism, constructive or otherwise. I'm even less interested in what you think about lesbian relationships, just putting it out there. My fanfiction is not a political statement... -Bec xx

Chapter 1

I woke up with a splitting pain in my head. Jesus, not again, was the first thought to cross my mind. Last time I'd ended up in hospital with blunt force trauma to the head the team had welcomed me back with a cake iced with the words Emily Prentiss: Head Injury Collector. Apparently I'd just made good on that title yet again.

There was nobody in the room when I awoke and I was somewhat disappointed. Usually when a member of the team went down somebody would hang around the hospital for them to wake up. Had my head injuries really become so common that they were no longer good for a bit of intra-team sympathy?

I flagged down a passing nurse who looked surprised to see me awake.

"Well look who's back in the world of the living," she said, smiling brightly. "You gave your friends a scare there, Agent Prentiss."

So where were they? I thought grumpily. The pain in my head continued to throb.

"Don't worry," the nurse went on, as if sensing my concern—or, more accurately, my annoyance. "I passed your girlfriend on her way to get coffee ten minutes ago. She should be back anytime now."

Before I had a chance to consider the possibility that I'd awoken in some parallel universe where my team didn't give a shit about me (but I apparently had a devoted girlfriend with a weakness for caffeine) or to weigh up the pros and cons of that situation, I heard JJ's voice.

"Kaitlyn, is Emily awake?"

Kaitlyn was apparently the nurse because she nodded and then smiled back at me. "Told you she'd be right back."

Holy hell. If I really had woken up in a parallel universe in which JJ was my girlfriend, I didn't want to go back! Sure enough, it was the bubbly blonde profiler, the star of my many shameless fantasies, who stepped past Kaitlyn into the room. In one hand she held a file and in the other a large coffee. Yep. Definitely JJ.

"I'll leave you two alone for now," Kaitlyn offered, which sounded great to me, and then she left.

"Jesus, Em," JJ laughed, shutting the door behind her. "We've been worried sick!"

"What do you mean?" I asked. I couldn't remember how I'd been injured but that wasn't necessarily a concern. I was used to head injuries messing me up a bit and was sure I'd remember with a bit of time and prompting. "How long have I been out?"

"Five days," JJ choked and now it became clear that her earlier laugh hadn't been one of amusement—'Haha, Emily's got herself another bump to the head'—but one of relief. And that relief was now causing her to fall apart.

Shocked and unsure what else to do, I held out my hand and when she took it I pulled her over to sit on the edge of the bed. With some difficulty I dragged myself into a sitting position and did my best to comfort her.

"Hey, Jayj, I'm fine. Seriously," I promised. "...Do I look like hell or something?"

"A bit," JJ half-laughed, half-sobbed. "Oh my god, this is embarrassing. I need to pull myself together."

I could only stare as she placed her coffee and file down on my side table and used her free hand to wipe her eyes. Belatedly, I squeezed her hand.

"I— Uh— Did you tell the nurse I was your girlfriend or something?" Emily, you idiot, why would you ask her that?!

I was grateful when JJ let out a real laugh. "Yeah, sorry," she admitted. "They were hounding me to go home. I just blurted it out to keep them off my back."

"How long have you been here?" I asked and JJ looked awkward.

"I rode in with you in the ambulance..."

"Jayj, you've been here five days?!"

"Shit!" JJ said suddenly. "I told Hotch I'd call if anything changed. Everyone will want to know you're up!"

I was honestly astounded. Clearly JJ was trying to play it down but for her to have stayed here all this time was so extreme I didn't know how to interpret it. I must really look like hell to have her so freaked out... I fought the urge to go and check myself out in the bathroom. My head wasn't reacting well to movement; I was still reeling from sitting up.

JJ left then, to make the call, and I surveyed the room around me. Now that I thought about it there were more flowers than usual—I'd clearly been out long enough to accumulate them. I reached out to the bunch nearest me and checked the tag: Garcia's handwriting signing on behalf of the team. I smiled. Beside them were a smaller, less flashy bunch of what happened to be my favourite flowers. They had to be from JJ because I didn't think I'd told anyone else what I liked and if Garcia didn't know then the information didn't exist in soft copy. The little card nestled between the stems proved me right.

Wake up soon, Em. We need you back... JJ

The handwriting was shaky, uncertain, nothing like the long confident strokes I equated with JJ. Why was she so shaken up? Bracing for pain, I raised a hand to my head and felt a tight bandage stretching all the way around. I traced my fingers over my face and winced as I discovered bruises and lacerations I couldn't remember receiving. Okay, so I really did look like hell and it was clearly more than just a bump on the head... Maybe it was a good thing I couldn't remember what had gone down.

I noticed the file JJ had left behind and picked it up briefly. I wasn't sure what we'd been working on before I was knocked out but I didn't think this was it. The rest of the team must already be on a new case. It'd explain why only JJ was around. Putting the file back on my side table, I reached for my handbag, which had been conveniently left on the floor beside me. I didn't think I could make it as far as the bathroom but I managed to dig out a small compact mirror and, groaning at my horrific appearance, applied make up to cover the bruising. I imagined the doctors would probably prefer my face clean, but I wasn't going under the bandage that seemed to be covering my major injury. I just wanted to look a little less like death when the team arrived. If they were coming at all. Maybe they'd already flown interstate.

As I placed the handbag back on the ground, JJ returned with Garcia. "The others are in Portland but they'll be here to see you the minute they get back," she explained.

"I was already in the parking lot when Jayj called," Garcia added. "Thank god you're okay, princess! You're looking better too!"

"She put on make-up while I was gone," JJ noticed, sounding somewhere between amused and annoyed. "Emily, you do realise this is a hospital, right? It's okay to look a little worse for wear?" Then she grinned. "Although maybe it's for the best—I was just about to tell you your mother's on her way too."

If there'd been any colour in my face it would have drained away at that. "My mother," I repeated disbelievingly. "Why?"

"Maybe because you died on the operating table, then slipped into a coma for five days?" Garcia suggested sarcastically, dropping into the seat beside my bed.

I glanced up at JJ for confirmation. "I died?"

"Twice," JJ replied tightly. "I had to resuscitate you at the scene before the paramedics arrived." She gave Garcia a warning look, which caused to technical analyst, who had been about to speak, to giggle and mime zipping her lips. But JJ moved on before I could get myself together enough to ask about it. "Anyway, you'll be fine. The doctor said so. We just..."

"It was hard to believe when you weren't waking up," Garcia supplied, squeezing my hand.

I wanted to throw a tantrum and demand they call my mother back and tell her not to come but, on the off chance she was actually worried about me, I felt too guilty to actually do it.

"Jayj, did you happen to stop by my place and get me some clothes to change into...? I don't really want mother to see me in a surgical gown."

JJ smiled understandingly and retrieved my go-bag from underneath my bed. "I restocked it for you," she confirmed. "Knowing how stubborn you are when it comes to being in hospital."

"Seeing my mother is stressful enough at the best of times," I sighed.

Garcia appeared nonplussed. "How bad can she be?"

"Ten bucks she offers to pay for plastic surgery on my face," I bet her revealingly.

"Don't do it, Pen," JJ warned. "The odds against are poor."

Garcia laughed, then reached for her phone as it began to ring. No cell phone signs didn't tend to mean a lot to Garcia—maybe she'd turned off one of the three she usually had on her. "Hot stuff? ...Yeah, I'm with her now. Yep, she's really up! ...Derek says hi, Em."

"Hi Derek," I called dutifully, then turned to JJ as Garcia signalled that she was going to take the call outside. "Will you walk me to the bathroom so I can change? My head is killing me... Not sure what my balance will be like."

"Of course," JJ replied quickly. "How do you want me to...?"

"Give me your arm?" I suggested, wincing as I leaned forward to toss the heavy blankets off my legs. I found myself blushing as I realised the hospital gown had shifted up considerably while I slept and JJ's attempt to preserve my modesty by running her hand along my thigh, smoothing it back down, didn't help matters.

Taking her arm, I swung one leg after the other out of bed and paused for a minute before shifting my weight to the floor. A wave of nausea washed over me and I gripped JJ's arm tighter.

"Em, maybe you should just stay in bed—"

I cut her off her with a look and she smiled weakly.

"Right. Stubborn..." She said. "Try putting your arm around my shoulders and I'll put mine around your waist..."

It took us a minute to negotiate a stable and comfortable position but with her help I was able to walk to the bathroom, keeping my head as still as possible. When she dropped my go bag onto the tiled floor I knew I was going to need more help than I'd thought. Looking down at it made my head spin. I gripped her arm tighter.

"Em, I'm getting you back to bed," JJ sighed, sounding annoyed. "There's no way you can get yourself undressed and changed."

"Can't you just help me?" I pleaded, hating how small my voice sounded. "There's a railing I can hold onto, and you can just..."

For a second I thought JJ was going to say no but instead she nodded, although her expression remained guarded. "Are you...?"

"I'm definitely wearing underwear beneath this gown. No bra though," I told her. "I don't mind you seeing me if you don't. I just want a bit of dignity back before my mother gets here. You know what she's like."

That made JJ's mind up and she unpacked a bra, t-shirt, and jeans from my bag and placed them on the plastic chair that folded out from the bathroom wall. I could see from the look on her face that she hadn't considered how difficult the jeans would be to get into when she packed them.

I also noticed that she hadn't taken out a change of underwear and I was conflicted. On the one hand, I didn't really want JJ to see that much, but on the other hand I'd clearly been wearing the same pair of underwear for the past five days and that made me feel a little disgusting. If I couldn't shower yet, I definitely wanted a fresh pair of panties to wear.

"What is it?" JJ asked, sensing my hesitation.

"Maybe I can manage changing underwear myself if you don't want to..."

"Em, I'm not going to be responsible for you falling and cracking your head open again," JJ moaned resignedly. "Let's not draw this out and make it more awkward, okay? Can you maybe lean back against the rail and hold onto it?"

I did as she asked, backing up until my lower back hit the railing behind me. I released JJ to grip the metal on either side of my waist and steeled myself as she stepped toward me. Slowly, she reached her hands around my back for the single string tie of my gown and I bit my lip as I felt it loosen, not meeting her eyes. I felt her fingertips drag over my shoulders as she pulled it forward and then the gown was gone and JJ quickly turned away to hang it on the door.

"Maybe give me the bra first," I suggested when she didn't immediately turn back around.

"Good idea," JJ replied gratefully, but it soon became clear that neither of us had thought this through.

JJ stood before me holding my bra in her hands, deliberately looking me in the eye rather than down at my bare chest. At least she'd chosen an attractive bra, I couldn't help but think. Not that I was trying to be alluring… Was I? The thought that JJ had been in my room, sorting through my underwear, was causing heat to rise unexpectedly in my groin. She'd chosen a pair of black satin panties fringed with lace and a matching bra. Had she wondered what they would look like on me as she chose them? In any case, she had good taste. I filed that thought away for future reference.

"This is ridiculous," I said, more confidently than I felt. "We're friends, Jayj. I don't care if you see my boobs. I know you're going to have to touch them to get it on." Okay, maybe I could've phrased that last part a little better. Getting it on was way too close to what I really wanted to do with her… Albeit perhaps when my head was a little less painful and I was steadier on my feet.

"Sorry," JJ replied, immediately stepping closer and lifting one of my arms to pull it through the bra strap.

When she let go I grasped the railing again and she did the same with the other arm. Her face burned with the most tantalising maiden blush as she gently manoeuvred each breast into its cup. I couldn't help but stare at her, studying her face. Holding my breath, I tried to detach myself from the sensation of her hands on me. As she pulled her hand out of the bra the second time her palm grazed my nipple and the breath I'd been holding came out in an unmistakeable gasp.

"You said you didn't mind," JJ protested weakly.

"I don't mind," I insisted, cringing as I heard how low my voice sounded. I fought the urge to run my tongue across my dry lips, knowing it wouldn't help the situation.

JJ clasped the bra behind my back hurriedly and then nearly ran for my t-shirt. Here lay another obstacle—how to get it on without sacrificing my balance or jostling my head. I raised one arm, then the other, leaning heavily into the railway and feeling the cold metal bite into my lower back. JJ stepped up against me and rose onto her toes to slide the t-shirt over my arms, then she gently eased it over my head. Her fingertips brushed my neck and then moved down my sides to pull the shirt all the way down. She pulled my hips toward her so the shirt could fall down past where I'd been leaning against the bar. Then as she leaned me back, her fingertips skimmed the waistline of my panties… Uh-uh, nope. I cannot get wet just as she's about to change my underwear. Way too dangerous.

Squeezing my eyes shut, I purposely knocked my head against the tiled wall. It was agony but it did the job—pain seared through every layer of my consciousness, overcoming all thoughts of arousal.

...At least until JJ's hands clamped around my waist, holding me steady.

"Em! What happened! Are you okay!"

I struggled to ignore the feeling of her fingers digging into my skin and tipped my head back again, choking out a moan which I hope was taken as 100% pain-induced (the actual figured was probably closer to 50/50 pain and arousal).

"Em?" JJ raised one hand to the side of my face, tilting my face down toward her, desperate for an answer.

"Fuck," I groaned, leaning my face into her hand, refusing to open my eyes.

"What's wrong? Em, please, tell me! Did I hurt you?" JJ brushed her thumb across my cheek, apparently no longer bothered about our proximity. My stupid ploy to be less affected by our situation was only making it worse - I'd shocked her into touching me unreservedly.

"It doesn't matter," I bit out. "Can we just keep going... so I can lie down again."

"Do you still want me to change your underwear?" She asked, her eyes searching mine.

I forced myself to nod, although I wasn't sure I could handle it. "I don't like knowing how long I've been wearing them," I sighed and this time JJ didn't hesitate. She was clearly keen to get out of the bathroom and I couldn't blame her.

Without looking at me, JJ slid her thumbs under the waistband of my underwear and slid them down my thighs, the backs of her hands brushing against me until they'd passed my knees and I could kick them off. She ducked to the ground to pick them up and, in the process, brought herself unthinkingly close to my exposed lower body. Looking down, I saw her whole body tense as the realisation hit. She didn't look but her cheek was dangerously near…

I wondered if she could smell me and the thought caused my legs to wobble unexpectedly. After that JJ launched herself to her feet and tucked my panties away into a pocket of my go bag without looking at them. Then she carried over the fresh pair and knelt, again without looking. I raised each foot and chewed my lip as JJ's hand on my ankles guided them into the leg holes. This time she made an effort to hold her hands away from my body as she slid the panties up my legs. The waistband snapped against my hips as she let go.

"Almost done," she promised and I couldn't read her voice at all. I automatically nodded in reply, then regretted it. I should've just stayed in the fucking hospital gown. I'd wanted to feel like I had some dignity left when my mother arrived, but this was definitely not dignified... getting aroused while my co-worker changed me in a hospital bathroom. Could JJ tell? Fuck, fuck, fuck...

As predicted, the jeans were harder to put on. As JJ knelt again. I felt a strong urge to place my hands at the back of her head for balance but resisted, knowing exactly where that thought (and image) was coming from and how it could be (correctly) interpreted. The jeans required some working up my legs and, with all my strength focused on using the railing to hold myself upright, I wasn't much help.

As she pulled the jeans up my legs, JJ raised herself slowly off the ground. She took a step closer to gain leverage as she tugged them up over my ass and then held my eyes as she reached down between us to fasten the zip and button. Jesus, why did that feel so intimate after everything else? Maybe it was the way she leaned into me as she pulled up the zip, her closed hand brushing against the front of my panties... I gasped and my head rolled helplessly forward onto her shoulder. She froze as I let out a pant against her neck.

"Are you okay?" she asked slowly, her hand coming up to my waist again just in case.

"I'm fine," I breathed against her neck. "I mean, my head is still… But I…"

"I'm sorry if I crossed a line there."

I was gobsmacked and pulled my head back to look into her eyes. "If you crossed a line?"

I watched in astonishment as a blush coloured her face. "You know what I mean."

"I honestly don't."

Her eyes searched mine questioningly, as if unsure whether or not to believe me. "I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable," was the answer she finally came out with, and the way she said it was… I don't know. I got the picture that she was misunderstanding the way I'd reacted, which both relieved and worried me. Of course I didn't want her to know how much being exposed to her eyes and her hands had affected me physically and emotionally, but I was even less happy for her to think that she'd done something wrong or that her touch had made me feel anything but high.

She pulled away to sling my go bag over her shoulder, then offered me an arm to help me back outside and into bed. I was sitting up against the headboard by the time I could make myself reply. "...You didn't."

"What?" JJ asked, her mind having already moved on to something else.

"You didn't make me feel uncomfortable," I explain. "I mean I was uncomfortable, but I uncomfortable like…" …Shit I need to get of this room before I start coming onto her and/or she realises how turned on I am. Fuck, I couldn't say that.

"Emily, you're up," came my mother's brisk voice from the doorway, interrupting us. I'd never been so happy to see her.

"Yes, mother," I replied, sitting up straighter.

JJ's hand immediately reached out to my elbow to steady me and I gave her a smile, which to my relief she returned.

"You've looked better," mother announced as she strode into the room. "Have you thought about corrective surgery yet?"

"The doctor said it wouldn't be necessary," JJ put in and I could tell she was trying to stem her amusement, resulting from our earlier conversation with Garcia.

"Are you sure?" mother chirped ever-so-thoughtfully. "My doctor is really quite magnificent, Emily. He could fix your nose up while he's at it."

"Mother—" I began, at the same time as JJ declared, "I like Emily's nose as it is."

Both of us looked at JJ in surprise.

"You have a lovely nose," mother commented, appraising JJ as if her presence had only just registered. "Emily's is a bit big, I find."

"I think it's elegant," JJ answered firmly, cutting off my protest. "Ambassador Prentiss, you've got a beautiful daughter who's lucky to be alive right now."

I blushed under my mother's gaze, while JJ looked decidedly away. …Did she really think I was beautiful?

"Agent Hotchner told me you revived Emily at the scene," mother recalled. Then, surprisingly, she added, "Thank you."

The sincerity of the simple statement shocked me. Of course I knew my mother was glad I was alive—she may never have been the most devoted parent but she hardly wished me dead. I just didn't expect her so say it so unambiguously. I reached for her hand, registering her own shock as I did so.

"I'll be fine, mother," I promised.

She held my eye for a moment longer then nodded sharply and pulled back. "Well, I— That's all I— I'm very busy."

Biting back a smirk, I nodded too. "Of course you are, go on," I encouraged her and, seeming delightfully uncomfortable, my mother escaped the room.

"Do you really think I'm beautiful or were you just trying to shut her up?" I asked once she was gone. What was it with me today? I really needed to repair my verbal filter—there was no way I'd have asked that so unobliquely a few days ago.

JJ only raised an eyebrow. "Emily, you let me see you naked and you have to ask if I really…?" She breathed out hard. "I thought it was obvious how much I…"

It was hard to mistake JJ's tone now and I offered her my hand, pulling her to sit on the edge of my bed as she hesitantly took it.

"You thought you were obvious?" I whispered, my voice unexpectedly low and smooth. "When you knelt down and your face was so close... I was waiting for you to comment on how wet I was getting."

Was may have been the wrong word, I couldn't help but think as JJ's intense blue eyes stared into mine.

"Emily, did me undressing you turn you on?" she asked carefully.

I could only nod, catching my bottom lip between my teeth again. JJ's eyes followed the motion and seemed to linger at my mouth.

I wanted to lean in and kiss her but somehow that felt far more dangerous than talking about being aroused. A kiss didn't just mean I'm turned on by you, it meant something else, something more personal that I didn't think I was ready for JJ to know right now. At least I knew one thing for certain—her reaction before had proved that she was as attracted to me, physically, as I was to her.

At that moment, Garcia returned, slipping her cell phone into her pocket as she did so. "Hey, sorry I took so long," she apologised. "Jayj, Hotch wants to know if you're okay to join the team in Portland now that Emily's up? I told him I'd stay here."

"What about me? I can come," I suggested hopefully, and both women gawked at me.

"Emily, you just came out of a coma," JJ reminded me. "I just had to dress you, remember?"

Garcia's eyes widened. "I was wondering how you managed that…" she admitted, then she winked. "You lucky thing."

JJ sighed roughly and, to Garcia's delight, asked, "Which one of us?"